12/15/09 – Tuesday

I spent most of yesterday cleaning the house. Without those five little Cookies running around, I managed to get quite a bit done. I hadn’t cleaned the bathrooms in forever and a day (which really can’t be blamed on the Cookies, because I can close the bathroom doors to clean, and in fact I did … Continue reading “12/15/09 – Tuesday”

I spent most of yesterday cleaning the house. Without those five little Cookies running around, I managed to get quite a bit done. I hadn’t cleaned the bathrooms in forever and a day (which really can’t be blamed on the Cookies, because I can close the bathroom doors to clean, and in fact I did so that the Wonkas wouldn’t come in and get in the way), so I got those done, got the Cookie room scrubbed, the litter boxes changed and cleaned, the entire house dusted, and the entire house vacuumed.

I started around 11:00, and when Fred got home at 3:30, I was still going strong. I got everything done that I wanted to get done, except for washing the floors. They’re pretty grungy throughout the house, but I ran out of steam (and had to get dinner started) at 4:00, so the floors will have to wait for another day.

It’s nice to have the house clean, at least for a little while. After he took his shower last night, Fred said “My shower was more sparkly than Edward Cullen in the sunlight at high noon!”

HA.

It was quite lovely and mild out yesterday, and we even got some afternoon sun! I know it won’t last (the mildness, at least), but it was nice while we had it.

 

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We have, lately, had an issue with cats on the right side of my desk moving around so much in their sleep that the bed slides over to the edge of the desk. I don’t always realize it’s happening, so about once a day one kitten or another has fallen (in the bed, often while sound asleep) off the side of my desk. They usually land behind the computer, and then either hunch there, scared, or go running off to hide.

I’ve been trying to figure out what I could do to stop the falling (taking the bed off that side of the desk doesn’t work – they still sleep there whether there’s a bed or not, and they still fall over the side). Finally, I decided that I could use the rack the printer was sitting on, move it over next to my desk – it’s the same height as my desk – then just get something else to put the printer on.

Then, of course, I had to think about it for a while longer before we actually did anything about it. I looked at printer stands, which are too damn expensive, and other pieces of furniture, and then last weekend when Fred and I were at Lowe’s, we found another rack that we decided would work perfectly.

This is kind of how it looked at that side of the desk before I moved the rack over. You can’t see it, but the computer was sitting on the floor next to the desk, the shredder (always turned off unless I’m in the process of using it, worry not) was sitting next to that, and the recycling bin was sitting in front of the trash can (which was sitting in front of the computer).


(Gus and Jake)

With the new rack put together, I moved the original rack over next to the desk, put the computer and shredder on the bottom shelf and a couple of cat beds on top of it, and put the printer rack next to that.

Two years ago, I had two cat beds in the computer room – one on either side of my desk. Then I moved the big oak filing cabinet to the left side of my desk and put a cat bed there. Now I’ve got the rack so that cats won’t fall off the desk, and to be honest, if I wanted to, I could move the printer down to the middle level and put the box of paper and the scanner on the bottom level, move the top shelf down, and put a cat bed there.

I suspect it’s only a matter of time!

 

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Remember Caleb, from The Seven?

He’s all grown up!

His mom says: Thought you might like to see how beautiful John has become! He is a wonderfully intelligent cat. Every morning we play a hunting game. I hide kitty treats around the room and he enjoys the hunt! It is a challenge to find new places to hide the treats. I sit and enjoy my morning coffee while the mighty hunter brings home the kibble! Thanks again to his foster family!
Merry Christmas!

Doesn’t he look like he could be related to our Jake and Elwood?

 

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My house was super quiet last night. I called the vet in the late afternoon to see if the Cookies were done with their surgeries and ready to come home. I waited on hold for a few minutes, then found out that they weren’t all done yet, and I’d have to wait closer to 6:00 to pick them up.

I really hate bringing them home when they’re still groggy from the surgery, because they stumble around and look so confused. I opted to leave them at the vet’s overnight, and I’ll be leaving in a few minutes to go pick them up. I expect they’ll be mostly recovered, and ready to run around like their butts are on fire!

When I dropped them off yesterday morning, I got confused and almost renamed the Cookies! We were weighing them and then putting collars on them with their names, and after she’d taken two of them off to the cage in the other room, I looked down at the two Meezer cookies left in the carrier, and I said “I have no idea who these two are. Who do we have collars left for?” She said “TimTam and Milano?” and I had to think for a LONG time before I realized that I’d told her Pink’s real name is Lorna Doone when OF COURSE Pink’s real name is Milano (Orange is Lorna Doone), so she had to go get Pink so we could rectify the situation.

Speaking of their weights, Hydrox weighed the most, at 3.5 pounds. The closest Meezer was Keebler, who weighed in at 2.7 pounds! There was another foster mom there dropping off her babies (hi Cydney!), and she couldn’t believe how heavy he was. He is going to be one huge cat!


Look at Orange looking at me, all “WHAT did you say about my mother?! I will kick your BUTT!”


Miz Poo’s all “FINE, let the BABY have the heated bed, I’ll just lay here in the PRETTY bed! And she can’t have it!”


If that look on her face doesn’t say “smug”, I don’t know what does.


“Hellooooooo, laydeez!”


I sure do love his gorgeous stripes!


Cookies, Cookies, everywhere!


I love it when one of them hooks her chin over the other one. They just look so content.

 

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Spanky say, relax.

 

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Previously
2008: It’s not been a good time to be a finger on the hand of Robyn And3rson lately.
2007: When one has to peck the ground for bugs and worms, one gets mud on one’s beak.
2006: So that’s the story of my search for the perfect bra, and how I found it.
2005: I probably have a brain tumor.
2004: I swear, my Grinchly heart grew three sizes right then and there.
2003: A tree with glass ornaments? In a house with five cats?
2002: No entry.
2001: No entry.
2000: I told Fred we should hire her out to the local police agencies and she could tell them when someone looks like a “drug person.”
1999: Fred and I came to an agreement last night. The end of March, I’m going off the birth control, and we’re going to start trying to get pregnant. (HahahahahahaHAHA! My, how times have changed!)

12/14/09 – Monday

If you’re a lover of the habanero jams and hot sauces, please be aware that I have now used up all the habaneros we had saved in the freezer, and what’s listed on the jam page is what’s available. Once all that stuff is gone, there will be no more available until next Fall at … Continue reading “12/14/09 – Monday”

If you’re a lover of the habanero jams and hot sauces, please be aware that I have now used up all the habaneros we had saved in the freezer, and what’s listed on the jam page is what’s available. Once all that stuff is gone, there will be no more available until next Fall at the very earliest.

 

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So, I went for my mammogram on Friday. I wasn’t particularly dreading it, because it’s a bit uncomfortable, but nothing too bad, and I was mostly interested in getting it over with so I could go on with my day and get my errands run. The place where I go gets you in and out pretty quickly – my appointment for the mammogram was at 7:30, so I showed up at 7:15 as directed, and I only sat in the waiting room for about ten minutes before they called me back. And then I only had to sit in the second waiting room for about five minutes, if that, before the tech (I have no clue what her actual job title was) called me back.

As she was positioning my right breast on the pad, she said “You’ve lost a lot of weight!”

“Yes I have,” I said. “I had weight loss surgery in 2006.”

“I’d love to have weight loss surgery,” she said. “But I’d have to gain weight to qualify for it. But that might be fun, just eat whatever I want and gain all that weight so I could have the surgery!”

I smiled.

We chatted as the mammogram continued, and once it was over, she told me I was all set.

“You had surgery in 2006… so, have you lost weight in the past year that would make a difference since your last mammogram?” she said.

“No, maybe a few pounds, but nothing big,” I said. My weight generally stays within a four-pound range, and has for the last two years. She jotted a note.

As I walked out of the room, she cheerily said “Well, keep going! You’re looking good!”

“Thanks!” I said, and headed for the dressing room to change back into my clothes.

I was halfway through getting dressed when what she’d said hit me, and I sputtered indignantly.

I wanted to go back to the room where she was and knock on the door and yell “WHAT THE FUCK, LADY?! ‘KEEP GOING’?! Where the fuck am I supposed to GO?! I’m not gonna ‘KEEP GOING’ because I’m THERE. I’ve ARRIVED at where I want to be!”

But I didn’t because I would have sounded like an idiot. I’m sure she meant to be all positive and encouraging, but man. When someone who’s seen you naked from the waist up implies that you’re still a fat fattypants DESPITE THE LOSS OF ALMOST 200 POUNDS FROM YOUR HIGHEST WEIGHT, it tends to take the wind out of your sails, you know?

So it’s ironic that when I got home, Annette had left a comment telling me that I was looking skinny in the picture I’d posted of myself in the kitchen with 130 cats.

TAKE THAT, MAMMOGRAM TECH LADY!

(For the record, I was not really upset by what she’d said, because I know she meant to be encouraging. It reminds me of when Fred had lost 150ish pounds and went for a massage. He looked REALLY good and did NOT need to lose any more weight, but she, too, told him to “keep going”. WTF with these people and the “keep going”?!)

 

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I have put up zilch in the way of Christmas decorations this year and don’t intend to, because the idea of fishing kittens out of the Christmas tree a zillion times a day and hearing ornaments bounce all over the house makes me tired.

HOWEVER, I have recently learned that they make half trees that you can hang on the wall and put lights and ornaments on. I’m missing having a Christmas tree this year, so you better believe I’ll be getting one of those half trees for next year!

Also, speaking of Christmas, I’ve decided that I’m going to spend the next year hand-making Christmas cards to send out. So next year, the great Bitchypoo Christmas Card exchange will be back, because I have to admit that I’ve really missed it this year!

 

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I’ll be leaving in a little while to take the Cookies for their spaying and neutering. Right now they’re closed in their room, probably hungry (I took their food away at bedtime last night), and I’ll be flinging the door open in a few minutes, snatching them up, tossing them in the carrier, and hopefully I’ll have them at the vet before they know something’s up.

I’ll spend the day getting their room and litter boxes scrubbed down, and when they come home tonight, they’ll have a nice clean room to recover in.

Saturday night, after we’d put the Cookies and the Wonkas in their respective rooms, we were laying in bed, and suddenly one of the Wonkas started banging on their door. I figured they’d stop, but after it had gone on for several minutes, I suggested that we just let them stay out for the night. Fred agreed, so I let them out, and it worked out pretty well.

Gus is a very polite sleeper – he curled up against me and went right to sleep. Mike, on the other hand, would have slept on my face if I’d let him. He ended up flopped across my neck for most of the night, and I woke up several times to find him purring very loudly, gently kneading my arm. He stayed with me all night until Fred got up, and then he followed Fred downstairs. I also woke a few times to find Veruca and/ or Violet perched atop me. They’re super light girls, though, so it certainly wasn’t annoying or painful.

I love all the Wonkas, but I’ve got to admit that I’m going to miss Mike the most. Considering how hissy and spitty he was when he first came here, it continually amazes me how friendly and laid-back he is. Last night Fred picked Mike up with his hands under Mike’s armpits and then gently swung the lower half of Mike’s body forward (he said it was “The Mikey dance”), and Mike just kept on purring. It cracked me UP. Mike will just let you do anything to him, he’s happy no matter what’s going on. He prefers to be sitting in a lap or snuggled up against me when I’m at my computer – DEFINITELY a people cat, our Mikey.


I was going to say that Mike’s a ladies’ man, but since that’s Keebler right next to him, I guess I’d better say he’s a Meezers’ man.


Violet, sound asleep next to Keebler. I’m sure there was some hissing on her part before she gave up and went to sleep. She and Veruca always have to have their say when one of the little ones gets too close, but none of the other cats seem too alarmed or impressed by the growling.


Blue. I don’t know why I said Blue has those ear points like Keebler does, because she clearly doesn’t.


Miss Blue.


Gus, in the computer room, with the ear floof.


One evening last week, the Cookies had their vaccinations, and it knocked them for a loop the next day. They stayed in their room, in this bed, for the better part of the day. They finally found some energy around dinner time, but the house was certainly quiet without them running around making trouble!


Still sleepy.


Keebler (top) and Pink (bottom). Pink’s ear is bent over like that because she was in the process of shaking her head. Too bad it doesn’t stay like that; it’s particularly cute, isn’t it?


Sleepy Meezer.

 

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Pretty Jake.

 

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Previously
2008: No entry.
2007: Well, I don’t “always” say it. In fact, that would be the first time I’ve ever said it. But I’ll say it more in the future!
2006: “MY BABY IS IN PAIN, MAKE IT STOP!”
2005: I’m impressed with myself, if you couldn’t tell.
2004: It is in the 20s here today, IS IT OKAY FOR ME TO BE COLD NOW?
2003: (”Thanks, me! I’m so thoughtful!”)
2002: No entry.
2001: Trust me, it was far more horrifying-looking in person.
2000: Babbling.
1999: No entry.

12/12/09 – Saturday

Challenger’s House is having a raffle! Check out the great prizes above. The drawing will be on Sun December 20th. Tickets are $5 for 1 or $10 for 3 – you can call Challenger’s House (256.420.5995) and buy your raffle tickets that way. The money, of course, goes to a very good cause!   * … Continue reading “12/12/09 – Saturday”

Challenger’s House is having a raffle! Check out the great prizes above. The drawing will be on Sun December 20th. Tickets are $5 for 1 or $10 for 3 – you can call Challenger’s House (256.420.5995) and buy your raffle tickets that way.

The money, of course, goes to a very good cause!

 

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Wednesday night/ Thursday morning I had a very long and involved dream that Terry had been adopted. I woke up once or twice and went right back into the dream. In the dream, I even called Susan, the shelter manager, and said (I kid you not) “Did Terry really get adopted, or did I dream it?”

When I woke up, I was disappointed to realize that it was, indeed, a dream.

Well, I MUST BE PSYCHIC, because guess who got adopted last night!!!!

Not only did he get adopted, he got adopted alongside another Challenger’s House kitten, Treat, so he’ll have a little brother to play with.

I can’t tell you how relieved I am that all of the True Blood kittens now have loving homes.

It’s a Christmas miracle!

2009-08-19 (10)

I can tell you that it’s probably a good thing he was adopted. Fred and I had decided that if he was still unadopted when it was time for the Wonkas and Cookies to go to the adoption center, we’d bring him home to give him a break from the cage.

And I’m pretty sure he would have ended up here permanently.

 

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It is truly amazing that I ever manage to get anything done around here. (Pardon the weird angle of the picture. Fred snapped that.)


All five Cookies to the right of me.


All four Wonkas to the left (and Tommy in the background!)


Hydrox had better things to do, and abandoned his sisters, who sat and looked grumpy for a little while before going back to sleep.

The Cookies are going to be spayed and neutered on Monday!

 

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Previously
2008: I was under the impression that chickens don’t like to be wet at all, but they seemed to be handling it pretty well.
2007: I’m telling you, the book-buying thing. It’s an illness!
2006: I did a lot of nothing yesterday
2005: (If you must know, it’s the “Tinferl” that really hit my funny bone. I don’t know. Don’t look at me like that. Shaddup.)
2004: Those two just make me shudder. And not in a good way.
2003: “Hey!” he thought to himself. “I think that might be the same bird and the same feeder!”
2002: “That’s okay, Bessie. I hate you sometimes, too,” he said.
2001: No entry.
2000: A blue spark leapt from my tender, sensitive pinky finger to the door of the Jeep in the Wal-Mart parking lot, and I all but screamed.
1999: But if I end up MIA, y’all know where to tell the cops to look…

12/11/09 – Friday

Challenger’s House is having a raffle! Check out the great prizes above. The drawing will be on Sun December 20th. Tickets are $5 for 1 or $10 for 3 – you can call Challenger’s House (256.420.5995) and buy your raffle tickets that way. The money, of course, goes to a very good cause!   * … Continue reading “12/11/09 – Friday”

Challenger’s House is having a raffle! Check out the great prizes above. The drawing will be on Sun December 20th. Tickets are $5 for 1 or $10 for 3 – you can call Challenger’s House (256.420.5995) and buy your raffle tickets that way.

The money, of course, goes to a very good cause!

 

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This will be a quick one – I’ve got a mammogram very early this morning, and then I have errands to run, so I don’t have a lot of time before I have to leave.

 

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I need another mug like I need a hole in the head – I NEVER EVEN USE THE DAMN THINGS! – but I’m having a hard time restraining myself from buying this one. Seriously, is that not adorable? Also, this one.

Must. Resist. First I start buying mugs I won’t use, then I start developing an unnatural attachment to the boxes they came in and then HELLO HOARDERS CAMERA CREW, COME ON IN! WATCH OUT FOR THE 638 CATS!

 

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Desi emailed to let me know that you can get free access to Consumer Reports using a library card. Check it out!

Consumer Reports Online Access for Free.

 

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I am not sure where I got this, but I always thought a Dutch Oven was when you are in bed with your partner and they fart and pull the blankets over your head (Or pull the blankets over your head then fart). Either way, farting was involved.

That would be the alternate, much less fun and much more pungent definition of a Dutch Oven!

 

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Have you tried PW’s chicken spaghetti? It’s the only thing I cook a whole chicken for.

I have not, but I do have a recipe for chicken spaghetti that I made just last weekend (Fred was out of lunches for the upcoming week, so I whipped up a batch of chicken spaghetti, which gave him lunches not only for this week, but next week too! Don’t worry, he freezes them, doesn’t let them get nasty in the fridge). My recipe for chicken spaghetti involves a lot less cheese, no green peppers, and zero pimentos, which are the work of THE DEVIL. Mine also includes black olives, and mushrooms. I’ll try to remember to get mine typed up and posted over at my recipe site one of these days.

 

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Even though I have never thought about purchasing a dutch oven, now all of the sudden I feel like I HAVE to have one. May I be one of your lemmings, Robyn?

Indeed you may. You NEED a dutch oven, you really do!

 

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OK, cook some stew or pot roast or beans in your big pot. Then cook same in a dutch oven, in the oven or on the stovetop. That should convince you that you need one.

Everything seems to cook better in one. Use your big pot for cooking soup or pasta.

P.S. we’re talking cast iron here, right?

Of course it’s cast iron – enamel coated cast iron, so it’s easy to clean, doesn’t need to be seasoned, and yet still a total workout when it’s time to cook! Mine are Lodge Dutch Ovens, and did I mention I LOVE THEM?

 

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Because you gave me a reason to look up the etymology of another idiom, I found this:
http://www.word-detective.com/2007/03/01/champchomp/

I think I knew it was champing, but to be honest, I don’t like it. (As if THAT matters, lol) I don’t even like it now that I know it came from “champion”, because it doesn’t seem to make much sense. This is one of those times I will NOT be sorry to see a word/phrase evolve into the incorrect form.

“Chomping at the bit” does roll off the tongue a lot easier than “Champing at the bit”, doesn’t it?

 

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I’ve lost count — how many felines are y’all taking care of now?

11 of our own + 5 Cookies + 4 Wonkas = 348!

(Or at least that’s how many it feels like we have when they’re all running around the kitchen screaming that they are STARVING! TO! DEATH!)

Which reminds me – last Friday, local reader Jean challenged me to get as many cats in one picture as possible. I guesstimated that 10 in one picture was going to be the max we’d be able to achieve, but imagine my surprise when at snack time one night the kitchen was overrun with cats, and Fred started snapping pictures.

Fifteen!

And yes, I know that #1 is only Newt’s tail, but I’ve decided that it still counts! I’m really, really surprised that we were able to get that many cats in one picture. AND that no one was smacking anyone else, since there’s a LOT of hissing and growling and smacking when they’re waiting for snacks to be doled out.

 

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In the first picture, with the Cookie and the Blues Brother, does the Cookie have ear tufts like a lynx? OMG.

Three of the Cookies have these tufts of hair at the ends of their ears – I don’t know if there’s a particular name for them, but I’ve been calling them “points” – as in “That’s not Orange, Fred, that’s Keebler – see his points?”


The point at the end of Pink’s right ear.


Those two pictures above are Keebler – they show his points quite nicely, don’t they?

The other Cookie with points is Blue, but I didn’t happen to get a picture of hers.

 

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“Awesome” seems to be making a comeback. I thought we lost that with Lionel Ritchie. What I was noticing was people saying Yea Yea Yea instead of simply yes or yea. Being on the receiving end makes it seem like the person is actually irritated with you and is trying to get you to shut up.

I have to admit that I use “awesome” a lot – I picked it up in the 80s and never stopped using it!

That “Yea yea yea” thing drives me nuts – I think people are using it to show that they’re enthused or that they understand what you’re saying, but I always hear it as “Shut up so I can say something much more important and interesting!”

 

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Dead cats? OMG. I watched Hoarders maybe once or twice and I just can’t bear it. Besides the godawful mess these people have created, at least in the ones I saw, they had trouble accepting help to clean it up. Had to look at every single thing. Interrupted whatever progress there was to make sure nothing “important” had been thrown out. It scares me.

I used to watch Clean House sometimes too (muted) and that scared me, too.

But dead cats? Wouldn’t they smell? OMG, the houses already smell don’t they? Ok, officially creeped the eff out now.

People, please skip this if you’re eating.

I think in one of the shows – the one with the cat hoarders – someone explained that the cats die, but there isn’t time for them to start stinking up the place, because THE OTHER CATS START EATING THEM.

Gah.

But yeah, those houses have got to have the most horrific smell to them. One of the hoarding specialists on one of the shows (I don’t remember which – I think it was the guy who lived with his alcoholic father) said that the smell of the house was burning the back of her throat.

I’ve never seen Clean House, but enough people have mentioned it, that I’m going to have no choice but to check it out!

 

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I tend to forget this until I see all of them together, but Keebler (back left of the picture) is much darker than his Meezer sisters. Look how strikingly dark those stripes on his legs are!


Pretty, pretty Hydrox. I love the way his whiskers look so striking against his black fur!


Another shot of Keebler. Look at him, looking so innocent when he was JUST biting that tail right in front of him and making his sister cry!


They are such sweet little monkeys, I can barely stand it!

 

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“Well, hellooooooo, ladies!”


Gus and Veruca, snuggling.


Violet.


Veruca keeps a suspicious eye on Elwood.


All four Wonkas in one bed – and Miz Poo as a bonus!

 

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I can’t help it, this picture makes me laugh and laugh. Sugarbutt slept right through this horrific invasion of his privacy.

 

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Previously
2008: You know how a body at rest wants to stay at rest?
2007: Mister Boogers regarded me
2006: How these cats aren’t the size of Tubby, I will never know.
2005: No entry.
2004: And if I ever get the urge to go shopping at the mall on a Saturday two weeks before Christmas, I’ll lay down until it goes away.
2003: Thank god I’m not famous. I could handle being followed around by the papparazzi, but live interviews on the TV and radio? Fuck THAT.
2002: My favorite Christmas entry, ever. Chock-full of the Bitchypoo Christmas Spirit.
2001: Of course my world revolves around me and the people I care about. And yours revolves around you. Except when it revolves around me.
2000: I think they should hire me to play his girlfriend – the stripper with a heart of gold – because I just love that man right to pieces
1999: No entry.

12/10/09 – Thursday

If you check out my blog you will see some photos of deer in our neighborhood that have been horribly treated. Not only are these living animals these activities are illegal. Can you help me spread the word that these gentle creatures are not to be kept as pets or treated as targets for practice? … Continue reading “12/10/09 – Thursday”

If you check out my blog you will see some photos of deer in our neighborhood that have been horribly treated. Not only are these living animals these activities are illegal. Can you help me spread the word that these gentle creatures are not to be kept as pets or treated as targets for practice? I was hoping you might be able to help me spread the word. Thanks, Wendy

 

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Tuesday it rained all day, and that night when Fred went off to bed, he called me into his room to look out the window. The entire back forty was covered in water, the garden was covered, the back yard was covered. As far as I could see, there was nothing but water.

Half worried that we were all going to float away (or at least that the chicken coops might), I went to bed.

Yesterday morning it was clear and bright and sunny, and the water had receded quite a bit.

Last night, the temperatures dropped into the 20s, and it’s supposed to be COLD AS SHIT for the foreseeable future. I’m actually not complaining, believe it or not, because I’d rather the ground get cold and hard so every time I go out to the back forty, I don’t sink into six inches of mud.

 

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I finally got around to watching Hoarders. I know y’all mentioned it to me when it first came on, and I swear I thought we didn’t get A&E, so I made a mental note to watch an episode or two online. I never got around to it – mostly because I hate sitting and watching anything longer than a few minutes on the computer – and then last week I checked again, and lo and behold, we DO get A&E. I set up to tape, and have recorded a few episodes.

Tuesday, I decided I was going to have a lazy-ass day, so I snuggled up on the couch with a varying number of kittens, and watched TV.

SKIP THIS PART IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN THE MOST RECENT EPISODES OF BROTHERS AND SISTERS.

1. That whole shit with Nora and Simon and her ending up giving him money is so OBVIOUS AND HAM-HANDED that I’m embarrassed to watch that shit. I tell you what, if I ever end up a rich widow and start dating some guy who runs a “charitable organization” and needs “funding”, I will boot him out on his ass so fast he won’t know what hit him. DON’T BE A VICTIM, NORA. (That said, I’m sure it’ll end up being TOTALLY legit. Or whatever. I don’t care for this particular storyline, though Kitty stumbling across Nora and Simon in the shower cracked me UP.

2. Why the fuck do people who have serious illnesses feel the need to hide shit from the people around them? I hate that shit.

3. Oh, and of COURSE Kitty’s got to collapse at Justin and Rebecca’s wedding. Did I mention “ham-handed” and “obvious”? Also, that blond wig has got to GO. I cannot believe Rebecca would ever want to marry into that crazy-ass

OKAY IT’S SAFE, BROTHERS AND SISTERS WATCHERS.

So then I watched three episodes of Hoarders. And why did two of them have to feature people who had DEAD CATS in their houses? I was watching the one with the elderly couple who had cats all through their house (they thought they had 20 or 25, but as it turned out, there were 70-something cats in the house, about half of them dead) and I was watching them walk around putting cat food on plates for cats in various parts of the house, and I had a mental image of myself EVERY FUCKING NIGHT standing in the kitchen with ten million cats dancing around me and squawking and whining about how starving they are, and how I’ve started putting Stinkerbelle’s nightly snack on the top of the canning cabinet because she’s all “I am hungry, but THEY’S TOO GODDAMN MANY CATS IN THERE” and then how I follow Spanky to another room because he’s all “I would enjoy a snack but THEY’S TOO GODDAMN MANY CATS IN THERE” and I leave the snack wherever he settles, and I was all “HELLO I AM SEEING MY FUTURE.”

When your cats are telling you that you’ve got too many cats? You might have too many cats.

(But does the fact that nine of them are transitory make a difference? And also, I don’t use paper plates? I use REAL plates. And then I wash them. Oh god help me, I’m a fucking lunatic, aren’t I? I’m going to go look under my bed and make sure there are no dead cats.)

The last one I watched, that I finished watching and then COINCIDENTALLY got up and started cleaning house, no correlation between the two, of course not, was the woman in Louisiana whose house was so bad that they devoted the entire show to her. Who had had no plumbing for six years, and the cleaning crew started cleaning her house, hit the bathroom and were all like “Um, FUCK NO THANK YOU, WE’LL WAIT OUT HERE.” They hauled something like 8,000 pounds of garbage out of her house.

Watching that shit makes me itchy, because OF COURSE I have hoarding tendencies. If one cat bed is good, sixteen is sixteen times better, right?

ARGH.

Seriously – if you’re not watching Hoarders, you’ve gotta give it an episode or two. Trust me.

 

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My Kindle arrived on Tuesday. I gave it to Fred to play with, and downloaded Uncle Tom’s Cabin for him (because it’s free), and after about fifteen minutes of him using the Kindle, he came in and gave it back to me and declared that he doesn’t like it.

MORE KINDLE FOR ME, THEN.

(Still can’t believe I have to wait ’til Christmas Eve to get Under the Dome on my Kindle. FUCKERS.)

I haven’t downloaded any books yet, mostly because I’m kind of stocked up on real books, and I ain’t gonna go pay for the same book again. I’m sure I’ll find something I want immediately, it’ll just take me time to figure out what.

Oh, and for the record? I REALLY like the Kindle.

 

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Anyone know what this bug might be?

 

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Miss Pink.


I know not why, but every kitten in the house adores playing in the can where I toss all my junk mail and magazines to recycle.


Keebler, pondering.


I don’t know why Elwood’s got that grumpy look on his face – he LOVES to snuggle with the little ones, and it’s not like they’re crowding him.


Five Cookies in one bed (you’ll note that Miss Orange almost always has her eyes on me. She’s a lovah, that one.)

 

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The many faces of Mike Teevee.

MY GOD I JUST LOVE HIS SWEET LITTLE FACE.

 

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Newt, in the back yard. Not lookin’ for trouble – but somehow, trouble always finds him.

 

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Previously
2008: I AM BESIDE MYSELF WITH EXCITEMENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007: It’s a pisser that the things that are the least fun – cleaning, laundry – are a neverending cycle.
2006: No entry.
2005: No entry.
2004: I want to marry you, Consumer Reports.
2003: The Bean’s nickname for today is “Stanley Rotten.”
2002: Xmas meme.
2001: And then Miz Poo SMACKS him again.
2000: No entry.
1999: I’m just saying.

12/9/09 – Wednesday

Finished your Christmas shopping yet? Are you STUMPED trying to come up with the perfect gift for one of those hard to buy for relatives or friends? Do you kinda wanna punch them in the nose when they shrug and say “Oh, just get me any ol’ thing!”? LOOK NO FURTHER. In these cold and … Continue reading “12/9/09 – Wednesday”

Finished your Christmas shopping yet? Are you STUMPED trying to come up with the perfect gift for one of those hard to buy for relatives or friends? Do you kinda wanna punch them in the nose when they shrug and say “Oh, just get me any ol’ thing!”?

LOOK NO FURTHER.

In these cold and gray days of winter, all anyone wants to do is bundle up in front of the fire and not move ’til Spring, am I right?

But unfortunately, there are things like “jobs” that are even more unfortunately not located near fires where you can bundle up and keep warm.

What is a cold person to do? What oh what?

I HAVE THE SOLUTION FOR YOU!


The ACME Portable FURnace is here to save the day! You just take this super-warm little ball of fluff, put it on your shoulder, and although it has a head that is stuffed with marshmallow fluff, it SENSES where the warmth is needed the most, and it will settle there!


NO difficult and messy settings, no annoying electric cords! You put the ACME Portable FURnace on, and forget it’s there!


You can place it on your shoulder for easy kissing access, or you can place it on the back of your neck for maximum warmth! A little rub between the FURnace’s shoulder blades turns on the vibrating massage function!


You’re taking phone calls! You’re filling out reports! You’re even attending meetings! AND NO ONE KNOWS IT’S THERE, KEEPING YOU WARM! If you weren’t so toasty and warm, you’d hardly know it was there yourself! It runs so smoothly it purrs!

SET IT AND FORGET IT!

The ACME Portable FURnace recharges itself AS YOU USE IT! Give it a bowl of food and some water, empty it occasionally in the nearest litter box, let it stretch its legs while YOU sleep, and it’s ready to go again the next morning!


OPERATORS ARE STANDING BY!

Call 1-800-FLUF-HED and place your order today! Act now, and for a short time only, you can get TWO FOR THE PRICE OF ONE! One can keep you warm while the other one is off whining about how hungry it is despite the fact that it JUST ATE!

Don’t delay! Order now for Christmas delivery!

Disclaimer: ACME Portable FURnaces are guaranteed to be as adorable as the one pictured above, but may not be as well-behaved; some FURnaces occasionally emit fountains of vomit down your back with no warning and for no particular reason; FURnaces are sometimes known to walk through their own feces and track it all over the place, leading one to sniff and say “Does it smell like butt in here to you?; FURnaces need to have their claws trimmed regularly or may shred your clothing in an attempt to keep their claws sharp; wearing loose clothing is unadvised, as the FURnace may take it as an invitation to go exploring and then pop its head out the front of your shirt to see what’s going on; FURnaces may regard hair as an attractive snack; FURnaces sometimes sneeze and get snot all over the nearest surface (which could be the back of your head); FURnaces will sometimes develop the habit of sitting an inch from your face in the middle of the night and howling “MAO? MAO? MAO?” until your brains leak out your ears; FURnaces are self-cleaning and may interrupt important meetings making smacking noises as they loudly clean their nether regions; though self-cleaning, FURnaces might need the occasional bath (see above regarding walking through their own feces) – use gentle shampoo and the warmest and fluffiest of towels when bathing the FURnace; do not shake the FURnace; do not let the FURnace get cold; speak kindly and gently to the FURnace; do not yell or scream at, shake, fold, spindle or mutilate the FURnace.

 

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Previously
2008: Fred laughed and laughed and laaaaaaaaughed, because it’s always funny when someone else is the idiot, isn’t it?
2007: Miss Stinky Seethes.
2006: No entry.
2005: It’s the little things that amuse us, obviously.
2004: Mister Boogers does his Donald Trump impression
2003: FUCKING spam.
2002: Are you an innie or an outie?
2001: No entry.
2000: No entry.
1999: God, the smell.

12/8/09 – Tuesday

Yesterday, I had an appointment for an ultrasound (so that, theoretically, my gynecologist can figure out why I’m spotting 8 – 10 days out of every freakin’ month). It was originally scheduled for the day before Thanksgiving, but they called and rescheduled. I knew, going into the appointment, that there was no way on earth … Continue reading “12/8/09 – Tuesday”

Yesterday, I had an appointment for an ultrasound (so that, theoretically, my gynecologist can figure out why I’m spotting 8 – 10 days out of every freakin’ month). It was originally scheduled for the day before Thanksgiving, but they called and rescheduled. I knew, going into the appointment, that there was no way on earth I’d be in and out of there quickly, and I was not disappointed (or rather, I was disappointed to be right!). My appointment was at 10:15, and when I left it was 11:45.

The ultrasound showed nothing. The wall of my uterus was so thin that she couldn’t even see the fibroid that showed up during my ultrasound in June (my uterus has been dieting, apparently). She’s ordering copies of the lab work done by the hematologist who did (ordered) my iron infusion, she’s going to look those results over, and then call me.

It looks like we’re headed for an endometrial ablation at this point. We’ll see.

This fucking horseshit sure is moving at a fucking snail’s pace.

 

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If I might inquire: what the holy fucking shit does “Jesus Gay” mean? It appears to be some sort of exclamation one uses to stress one’s point (“Jesus Gay is it cold out there!”), but for some reason I find it EXTREMELY irritating and thus please be warned that using it in my presence (or on your blog, which is where I’m stumbling across it) means you are giving me permission to hunt you down and smack you upside the head REALLY FUCKING HARD.

Other irritants:

1. The usage of “my man” instead of “Bob” (or whatever the fuck his name is). Yes, we know you have a man. Very impressive. Can we grow up now? Also, when you use lots of initials to refer to your children or coworkers or relatives, and they’re all so similar that I don’t have one fucking clue which one you’re talking about. Come up with a pseudonym and keep it simple. (Did I ever mention that 10 years ago (!) when I started my journal, I was going to use pseudonyms for Fred and the Spud and I, because OMG THE INTERNET STALKERS, but I couldn’t come up with ones that fit for Fred and I, so I gave up the idea. Clearly I kept the idea for the Spud, though!)

2. Bloggers constantly flogging their other blogs. (Like, I don’t know, ME and Love & Hisses?) I don’t want to go ELSEWHERE to read your shit, I want to read it IN ONE PLACE. (And thus just this second, I have decided to start posting my Wednesday all-cats posts here (and the weekend ones, too) as well as at Love & Hisses so you don’t HAVE to click over there. I didn’t really start Love & Hisses so you’d have to go elsewhere to read my shit, I started it so that those of you who like to show cat pictures to your kids wouldn’t have to wade through all the goddamn/ motherfuck/ horseshit/ fucking/ assface/ jumped-up-christ on a saltine cracker (etc.) talk. See? I can be thoughtful!)

3. When people go password protected and don’t leave a link to their email address or even a form to send a request, thus making it impossible for you to email them and ask for access. I GUESS I DIDN’T WANT TO READ YOUR BLOG ANYWAY, GODDAMNIT.

4. Those popup ads. Not the ones that pop up into another window (thanks to Firefox, I rarely ever see THOSE, thank god), but the ones that pop up and block the main part of the page, and you have to fucking FIND the “x” to close it, and then if you so much as look in the direction of where the ad came from, it pops up and does another song and dance, and honestly? Whoever thought that shit up should be crucified at dawn. Or sunset. I’m not picky. But DEATH TO THE CREATORS OF THAT HORSESHIT. Also, ads that have MUSIC or TALKING. I was on Dr. Phil’s page yesterday (shut up, I was looking for Alexandra’s blog) and there was this ad up at the top of the page with Hershey’s kisses, and if your mouse went anywhere in the upper right quadrant of the page, the GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING HERSHEY’S KISSES STARTED CLEARING THEIR THROATS IN PREPARATION FOR A GODDAMN HOLIDAY SONG. It pissed me off so much I yelled “OH DR. PHIL, I HAVE A SHOW IDEA FOR YOU, MOTHERFUCKER!”, and then I went and bought a couple of bags of Hershey’s kisses and ate the hell out of them to show them just who the boss is.

5. That you might think I’m talking about YOU. I am not talking about YOU, I’m talking about those OTHER annoying bloggers (unless you have those annoying ads on your site, then I am TALKING ABOUT YOU). You, I love because you obviously have excellent taste.

 

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I’ve had to stop reading Under the Dome (the Stephen King novel) for the time being. It causes me great emotional pain to lug that fucking thing around (Dear Stephen King: You had to use 1,000 pages to say the same thing that I AM SURE could have been said in approximately 500? They really do NOT edit you in any way anymore, do they? Sincerely, Your Biggest Fan.). My Kindle should be here today, and the first thing I’m going to do with it is download the Kindle version of Under the Dome.

Stephen King better be getting kickbacks from Kindle, because I’m SURE I’m not the only one who was pushed into a Kindle purchase by the sheer weight of that book.

I bet the Kindle version of that damn book won’t crack my sternum the way I can sense the hardcover version wants to.

Stupid heavy-ass books.

 

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It is cold and it is rainy and it is gray and ugly outside. I hate the weather this time of year. I told Fred that if we didn’t have so many kittens running around, I would have made a fire in the big fireplace by now. He said “They’re not going to JUMP in the fire! Give them some credit!”

I’d give them credit, except they have marshmallow fluff for brains. I have had to stop Orange and Blue from leaping into the fiery-hot oven at least twice each. Every time I do laundry, I’m paranoid that one of them has jumped into the dryer while my back was turned. On Sunday, I had just seen one of them hanging out by the dryer, and then after I’d put the clothes that were in the washer in the dryer he was nowhere to be seen, and I was worried that he’d jumped into the dryer while I wasn’t looking. So I pulled all the clothes out, to be sure there was no kitten in there. Then I started the dryer, walked away, and became concerned that somehow I’d overlooked a kitten among the wet clothes even though I’d pulled them all OUT of the dryer, so I stopped the dryer, pulled everything out, double-checked, started the dryer… And then went through the house counting Cookies (and Wonkas, while I was at it), just to be safe.

Damn kittens are stressing me OUT. But then they climb all over me, purring like crazy little Fluffheads, and the stress goes away.

Sometimes when I walk through the house, a herd of cats in front of me, fighting with each other, trying to trip me up, rubbing against each other and me and the walls, I sing a little ditty. It goes like this:

Too many kitties up in my shit. Too many kitties up in my shit. TOO MANY KITTIES UP IN MY SHIT.

Sounds like a hit, no?

 

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We have hit the point in time (and it happens with every litter, no matter how old they are, no matter how many of them there are) where I can’t do anything without having to shuffle along for fear of stepping on a cat. If I’m doing something in the kitchen, they sit there and scream at me about how they’re starving to death. Orange, the hungriest of the hungries (which makes it ironic that she’s the lightest of the Cookies – she’s at just under two pounds; Hydrox, on the other hand, is now three pounds. He’s going to hit double digits before Orange makes two pounds, I swear!) has learned to climb up me. She gets as far as my waist, and then she hangs there, howling angrily about her starvation.

Someone’s always growling at someone else. Jake and Elwood don’t understand that Violet and Veruca do not care to have them too close, and some evenings it seems that I hear a hellcat scream from every corner of the house. Those Wonka girls have some LUNGS on them.

The Wonkas have sneezed a few times, but don’t seem to really be developing colds (fingers crossed!). A couple of the Cookies have slight colds, but it’s been a few days, and they don’t seem to be turning into anything too bad. I had thought that I’d get them fixed this week, but it looks like it’ll have to wait ’til next week. Which is probably for the best – that way, Orange can pack on a few more ounces.


The Cookies seem to really like the bigger cats. Jake and Elwood don’t mind when the little ones snuggle up with them.


Of the Wonkas, Mike’s the only one who doesn’t much seem to mind when someone who is NOT of his litter snuggles up with him. The girls will hiss and growl and complain, but if Jake and Elwood are persistent enough, they’ll eventually give in. But they’re not HAPPY about it.


Mike was sleeping in the cat bed on Fred’s desk, when Blue came up to Fred asking for some love. Fred held her for a few minutes, then put her in the bed with Mike. They both sat there for a minute, like “What is THIS happy horsepucky?”….


…and then this happened.


Hydrox will snuggle up with anyone, anywhere, anytime. He’s not picky.


Jake got too close to Gus, and this was the result. Gus is NOT up for snuggling with anyone, anywhere, anyEVER. Unless they’re from his litter. He’s picky about who he snuggles with.


Keebler found yet another stack of cat beds, climbed inside, and declared it good.


Violet and Veruca are all “Do you SEE what we have to put up with?!”


Mike would like to know why Elwood thinks it’s okay to snooze in the foster room. Elwood and Jake LOVE to hang out up there. So does Stinkerbelle, for that matter.


Check out the size of those ears!


Front to back: Veruca, Violet, Mike, Gus, and Miz Poo.

 

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Spanky in a box!

 

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Previously
2008: ::DESPAIR::
2007: Stinkerbelle: “I have put my stamp of love upon him, and now I shall lay here and seethe with hatred for those hussies who think they can have him. THEY CANNOT.”
2006: Newton (full name: Newton “Newtie” McNewterton, the salty country kitty) is pretty, yet aloof. It drives the wimmins CRAYZEE.
2005: “Us”? Who’s this “us” kemosabe?
2004: I suppose I need to actually start buying lottery tickets to make these dreams come true.
2003: And also because you Canadians are so cool that I want to canoodle with each and every one of you.
2002: No entry.
2001: No entry.
2000: God bless the internet and online merchants, god bless their little black hearts.
1999: More Christmas talk.

12/7/09 – Monday

What we did this weekend. Saturday Got up early, went to Lowe’s to knock out our mile-long list that we’ve been adding stuff to for weeks now. Stopped by Walmart to pick up a few things. Fred put the truck in the back forty, and hooked it up to the trailer, which was partially in … Continue reading “12/7/09 – Monday”

What we did this weekend.

Saturday

Got up early, went to Lowe’s to knock out our mile-long list that we’ve been adding stuff to for weeks now. Stopped by Walmart to pick up a few things. Fred put the truck in the back forty, and hooked it up to the trailer, which was partially in the pig yard. He does that a week or so before it’s time to take them off to Freezer Camp so they’ll be used to it. Usually, he feeds them in the trailer, but the pig yard is now so freakin’ wet and muddy all the time that they were tracking tons of mud into the trailer. Once he determined that they had no fear of the trailer, he went back to feeding them on the ground so they wouldn’t be slipping around in mud in the trailer.

At 10, our weeks-long discussion about whether or not we wanted a Kindle as a joint Christmas present (from us, to us) came to a head due very much to the fucking FIFTY POUND book Stephen King just put out (reading in bed with that book = PAINFUL. Stephen King must be getting a kickback from Amazon for that freakin’ book), and I simultaneously placed an order for a Kindle at Amazon, and placed an order for this “Room with a View” for the cats (I know, I know, we do NOT need it, but it was HALF PRICE! God, I love Jeffers Pet.) I had to wait ’til 10 to place the order for the cat thing because it wasn’t going on sale ’til 10, and we had intended to be in the car AT 10, so when we left 10 minutes late, I was STRESSED and snapped at Fred who was wandering around the kitchen wanting to know where I’d put his cinnamon gum.

“DID YOU NOT KNOW YOU NEEDED YOUR GUM TEN MINUTES AGO!” I snarled. “WHY ARE YOU WAITING UNTIL NOW TO LOOK FOR IT?!”

So, we left. We got to Petsmart about 10 minutes late, but it was okay because the other helper was already there, and the display was set up and… oh? Did I not tell you?

Guess who played Santa at Petsmart on Saturday? And guess who was his helper?

Of COURSE I didn’t tell you in advance that Fred was playing Santa at Petsmart. He would have killed me and buried me in the back forty if I’d announced that he was playing Santa and y’all (or even some of y’all) showed up!

It was kind of fun. He played Santa a few years ago for another animal rescue group; this year it was for Challenger’s House. I’ve never been a “helper” before, so I had no idea what to expect. I’d been told that coming in costume was not only allowed, but encouraged, and as the day approached, I was starting to worry because not only did I not have any kind of costume, I had no kind of Christmassy outfit at all. I ended up buying a long-sleeved green t-shirt at Walmart and wearing a red t-shirt over it, and getting a last-minute Elf hat at Walmart. It was fine.

The other helper took the pictures, and I handed out the envelopes, printed out the pictures, and put them in the frames. It wasn’t super busy, and there was lots of down time. The time, not surprisingly, went by a lot faster when we were busy.

There were a LOT of adorable dogs, and they were all surprisingly well-behaved. I was disappointed that there were no cats or other animals, though.

So, if you’re local (or even if you’re not – I’m pretty sure Petsmarts across the country are all doing this) and want to help out Challenger’s House (or your local animal rescue group), go have your animal’s picture taken with Santa! It’s going on next Saturday and Sunday, and the Saturday and Sunday after that from 11 – 4.

I tried to convince Fred that we should go next weekend and take a chicken to have its picture taken with Santa, but he doesn’t seem to be going for that.

Sunday

I slept in ’til 6:03 (I’ve been getting up at 5:30ish so we can dose everyone with Lysine before Fred goes to work – and Saturday I had to get up early so we could get to Lowe’s and Walmart and home again as early as possible), then got up and did all the usual morning stuff (shower, litter boxes, dosing kittens with Lysine). I started going through the house gathering up boxes (we had a LOT of boxes laying around, because every time I get something in the mail and take it out of the box, the kittens are all “I LOVE THIS BOX IT IS THE BEST BOX EVER” and so I leave the box. The house was starting to look all hoarder-y, so it was time to do some cleaning. When I was done, the boxes were either stacked in a closet (if they were a good size for shipping stuff) or piled by the door (to be piled in the garage for the next trip to the recycling center), and then I cleared a few things off the table, did laundry, vacuumed the downstairs, and canned black beans.

(You are pondering to yourself at this very moment, I know you are, you are saying “Self, I wonder just because I am the curious sort, how many half-pint jars of black beans does one get from a one-pound bag of black beans once they have soaked overnight and then cooked for half an hour?”, and the answer is seven. Seven half-pint jars from one pound of dried black beans. Honestly, I thought it would be more.)

Then Fred went out to his workshop and he used some of the wood he’d bought at Lowe’s the day before, and he made a crate for me, a crate that will perfectly hold a dozen half-pint jars.

It was PERFECT. It was sturdy and the perfect size, and I liked it one hell of a lot. So he went back out and made two more for me. And I liked those a hell of a lot, too. Then I said “How many more crates can you make from the wood you bought?” He said “One more.” I said “Huh.” He said “What?” I said “I could use about ten more of them, to be honest.”

(I am using the crates to store jam and chicken broth because I’ve run out of room in the canning cabinet.)

He offered to show me how to make them myself, swearing that it was easy as pie. So once my black beans were done processing, I took them off the heat, and we went out to his workshop.

And I’ll be goddamned if it wasn’t awfully damn easy. I mean, they’re certainly nothing fancy, but I am certainly nothing fancy, and I certainly do not require fancy crates to store jars of jam and chicken broth in.


Mademoiselle Orange, with the great big mouth, approves. She guesses. But thinks the crate would be much better if there was a plate of food in there for her to scarf down.

I said to Fred, “Now that I know how to make a wooden box I FEEL LIKE THE WORLD IS MY OYSTER!”

I can sense myself champing at the bit* to become a box-making motherfucker.

At almost 2:00, Fred went out and lured the pigs into the trailer with food (HE USED THEIR LOVE AGAINST THEM) and then closed the trailer. I held the gate for him while he drove through (it’s always stressful for me, because I’m afraid George and Gracie will get out and then be impossible to recapture), and then we left. Driving any kind of distance at all with the pigs in the trailer gets me all stressed, too, because while I know the trailer is good and solid and they can’t break out or anything, THERE’S ALWAYS A FIRST TIME.

But we got them delivered to the, uh, camp counselor safe and sound, and then we made it home safely, as well.

Then we ran a few errands, and by the time we got home it was Snackin! Time! for everyone, and then time to settle down for the evening.

It was a busy weekend, but a productive one, I think.

*After arguing with Fred about whether it’s “chomping” or “champing”, I throw this link in here so that those of you who are about to leave comments telling me that “ROBYN, you are an IDIOT, it is CHOMPING at the bit, DUH” will resist. Except that you probably went and left that comment already before you came back to read the rest of the entry, didn’t you? DUH TO YOU, I SAY.

 

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Since we were at Petsmart for five hours on Saturday, guess who I got to see?


True Blood Terry!

It was SO nice to see him and pet him and snuggle with him for a few minutes. He came right to me when I opened his cage, and he purred like mad, and he rubbed his face on mine, and he talked to me.

I hated putting him back in his cage, but he was so friendly and happy that I just know he’s going to find a home soon. The right person just hasn’t come along, but he would certainly make someone a good Christmas present, don’t you think?

 

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Sweet, sleepin’ Hydrox.

That’s it for the Cookies pics today. Obviously I need to get the camera out and get to snapping more pictures!

 

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Oh, these teenagers and their attitude!


The Wonkas REALLY like sleeping in the bed on the dining room table.


See?


Ahem. It appears that Violet wants to be the focus of the picture!

 

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Okay, cat experts. This is Stinkerbelle. What would you call her? A Lynx point? A Lynx point Torti (because of the orange)? Something else entirely? I’ve never been quite sure exactly how to describe her!

 

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Previously
2008: No entry.
2007: That’s approximately 100 pounds of litter every two weeks.
2006: “I LOOK LIKE SID VICIOUS!” I said.
2005: I love my husband, but “Mrs. Fred And3rson” IS NOT MY FUCKING NAME.
2004: (I never claimed not to be a dumbass)
2003: I would be ever so grateful if you would restrain yourself.
2002: No entry.
2001: I knew y’all were a hip and happenin’ bunch of readers!
2000: Stuff I’ve bought.
1999: And it tasted excellent, of course, which made the eggfart stenchiness more than worth it.

12/4/09 – Friday

Vote for Suzanne!!! Good Mood Gig from SAM-e   * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *   I was reading a site the other day that led me to another site, that ultimately led me to … Continue reading “12/4/09 – Friday”

Vote for Suzanne!!!

Vote for Me
Good Mood Gig from SAM-e

 

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I was reading a site the other day that led me to another site, that ultimately led me to a site for some special kind of sea salt. The person who’d linked to the sea salt had raved about how excellent and amazing it was, and honestly when it comes to food or food preparation tools, it’s not that hard to get me thinking “I NEED THAT!” So I was reading about this amazing sea salt, and I was seriously thinking about ordering some (I am such a freakin’ lemming), and then I came across a sentence that included the words for the discriminating palate.

I closed the web page.

My palate does not discriminate. I do not have a discerning palate. I have a low-down and dirty pedestrian palate that is attracted to the lowest of the low. Diet Coke. Egg McMuffins. Laffy Taffy.

A few weeks ago, to thank someone for the help they’d given him, Fred ordered a small box of chocolates from his store. They were special, hand-made chocolates that were filled with things like honey from bees exposed only to the Xtabentum Orchid in Central America (I did not make that up). He had nothing that included milk chocolate, because guess who likes milk chocolate and cannot abide the bitterness of dark chocolate?

Me and my pedestrian taste buds.

Of the twelve chocolates he sent, there was only one (Opium: The flavor & aroma without the narcotic) that I liked. Most of them, I just didn’t care for. (The Opium was really good, though – after I ate it, I felt like I’d eaten honeysuckle)

I do believe I’ll stick with Dove chocolates, with the occasional foray into Godiva, thanks.

 

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Okay, recipe-havin’ people. Give me recipes for things to do with cooked, shredded chicken, would you? I made some fabulous Chicken Enchiladas with Creamy Green Chile Sauce last week (a recipe left in my comments – I used flour tortillas, warmed them in the microwave instead of frying them, used cheese only on top of the enchiladas, not inside them, and half as much butter as the recipe calls for), and am planning to make Baked Chimichangas next week. I can always use more suggestions, though – we don’t want to get bored, and we’ve got a LOT of canned chicken.

 

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If you love your dutch oven, please explain to me why it’s better than just a big pot. I always see recipes calling for a dutch oven but I don’t have one and have never used one.

I loved my 6-quart Lodge dutch oven so much that I went and bought a 3-quart dutch oven to use when I don’t need such a big pot!

I love my dutch oven because it heats much quicker and more evenly than my other pots. It’s the perfect size for just about anything I want to use it for. I always use it to make jams and jellies, I boil chickens in it, and at this moment I’ve got black beans soaking in it (I’ll be canning those later). Since I got my dutch oven, I almost never use the big pot I already had.

Everyone else, chime in here – let’s convince Shelly that she needs a dutch oven! 🙂

 

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I watched Four Christmases and Funny People over the weekend…Funny People was the worst movie I have seen in a long time, did not bother to finish it. I have not seen anything I really liked in a while, what are your recent LIKES, REALLY likes, and loves…from this year or years past?

You know, in recent memory the only movie I recall liking (aside from Food, Inc) was Star Trek, which we saw at the theater over the summer. We liked Taken, The Wrestler, Yes Man, Slumdog Millionaire, and Milk. Other than that, I’m truly drawing a blank.

Perennial favorites: Forrest Gump, The Stand (the miniseries), The Shawshank Redemption, When Harry Met Sally, The Bridges of Madison County (it took a couple of viewings before I actually appreciated that one), annnnd… that’s all that comes to mind.

What about you guys? What are YOUR recent and all-time favorite movies?

 

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I swear, you could just about braid that ear floof.

 

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Orange (left) and Blue.


I! HAZ! A! COMPLAINT!


Our front room (one half of which is our living room, and the other half of which goes mostly unused and I’m trying to convince Fred we should turn into another foster kitten room, but I’ve been unsuccessful thus far) gets kind of cold when the weather turns cold, so I have an electric throw on the couch to keep warm. The kittens love to curl up on it whether it’s turned on or not.


Orange, Keebler, and Pink.


Hydrox, Orange, Keebler, and Pink. Blue must have been off doing something important.

 

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Happy Spanky.

 

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Previously
2008: (you’re welcome for that visual)
2007: She’s a force to be reckoned with, that one.
2006: They are NOT OUR CATS. They have owners, damnit, and they’re not us!
2005: No entry.
2004: It is FUCKING cold downstairs in our house.
2003: And then I got the Best Picture EVER Taken.
2002: Fluff? Perhaps. But very entertaining fluff.
2001: “Who’s Robyn?” said the realtor.
2000: “You little bastard!” I yelled, and then ran at him
1999: Through three moves and a name change,
they’ve managed to keep up with me, sending address labels all the way.

12/03/09 – Thursday

I was reading a blog the other day (for the love of god, don’t ask me which one, I don’t remember), and she mentioned that another blog – a “mommy” blog – had gone passworded, and if you were a frequent commenter, you’d get free access, but everyone else had to pay a monthly fee. … Continue reading “12/03/09 – Thursday”

I was reading a blog the other day (for the love of god, don’t ask me which one, I don’t remember), and she mentioned that another blog – a “mommy” blog – had gone passworded, and if you were a frequent commenter, you’d get free access, but everyone else had to pay a monthly fee.

And that just blew me away. Because I truly do not get why anyone on earth would pay to read ANYTHING on the internet. There’s no information on this planet that’s not available for free on the internet – why the hell would anyone pay to read someone’s personal site? There’s no one so fascinating that I’d pay $5 a month to read what they have to say.

I mean, good for her for attempting to make money off her site and all, but (1) I’ve never heard of her before (this is a common thing – except for Dooce and…. well, Dooce, I only have a vague idea of who the “big” mommy bloggers are, and only because Nance tells me something about them and then has to explain who the hell she’s talking about. I sure as shit don’t read any of them. I didn’t know half of the names on the BlogHer list, mostly because mommy bloggers aren’t really my thing. I mean, I read plenty of bloggers who are moms, but I don’t consider them “mommy bloggers.” They might consider themselves mommy bloggers, but I don’t particularly. And it’s funny, I certainly enjoy reading about other bloggers’ kids, but most of them are bloggers (could I say “bloggers” just a FEW more times?!) who do not have their heads up their asses. I get quickly bored by the “Oh my special snowflake, let me tell you AT LENGTH about his/ her special snowflakeness.” shit. To be fair, I’m sure they’d get quickly bored by my “Let me tell you about MAH KITTEHS” shtick, too.) and (2) No one is that fucking fascinating.

I know y’all know of my deep and abiding love for Stephen King, but I wouldn’t even pay to read a blog personally written by him, that’s how opposed I am to paying for access to a site.

For a little while – about a year, I think – I paid to be able to get onto the Consumer Reports site, but then I thought “This is fucking ridiculous. There’s nothing Consumer Reports can tell me that I can’t find FOR FREE on the internet, fuck this paying horseshit.” and let my membership lapse. They email me sadly every few weeks to try to convince me to come back, but I will not be wooed back into that relationship, thanks. I HAVE MOVED ON.

There’s a site I read for a while about frugal cooking and such, and she recently started up a pay forum. Because there aren’t 3 million PERFECTLY free frugal cooking/ shopping sites? I don’t mind clicking on the occasional ad, but paying my own money to read something I could read somewhere else for free?

Ain’t gonna happen.

 

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This will only be interesting to those of you who use Google Reader to keep up on your blog reading. Swistle Twittered the other day about this awesome Google Reader add-on for Firefox.

This one here.

It is AWESOME. There are a lot of options that I don’t even particularly understand so I don’t use them, but the ones I really like are the “preview” one, where you can read those incredibly annoying truncated posts IN THEIR ENTIRETY right there in the Google Reader, and the “cleaner font” skin.

Highly recommended.

As you were, non-Google Reader users.

 

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Grossmans Garden and Home is going to donate a $100 Gift Certificate to the Verona Street Animal Society’s Frosty Paws Silent Auction if we can help get their number of Fans on Facebook to 500 by the end of the year (they are currently at 170). It’s a stretch but doable.

If you are currently a member of facebook, you can become a Fan of theirs by going to www.grossmans.com – toward the bottom right there is link to become a Fan (or you can search on Grossmans Home and Garden in Facebook and then become a Fan that way).

They are also asking for people to post holiday pictures of their pets up on their Fan page.

 

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The Wonkas have been spayed, neutered, rabies’d, and ID chipped! I picked them up yesterday afternoon, and the boys spent the evening racing around like wild things, then sleeping in my lap. The girls were still a bit dopey, and slept the evening away at my feet.

This morning, it’s like nothing even happened to them. It’s amazing how quickly they recover!

A couple of people asked when they’ll go off to the adoption center. It all depends on when there’s room, but I imagine it won’t be too long now.

I am CERTAINLY going to miss them, so I’m spending as much time loving on them as I can. They’re such a sweet and friendly bunch, I don’t imagine it’s going to take long for them to get snatched up!


I calls him “SnuffleFLOOFaGus.”


::thlurrrrrrrp!::


Peekaboo!

 

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Forever Foster asked how I resist the urge to smooch my fosters all the time. The truth is, I never ever resist the urge. I am ALWAYS kissing a kitten. If there’s a kitten near me, I’m usually kissing it, about to kiss it, or have just kissed it. I am a kitten-kissing fool. My lips are actually chapped from all the kissing.

Fred occasionally wonders aloud what cats think about all the kissing that goes on, whether they understand that it’s a sign of affection. I think they might not understand exactly what’s up with the kisses, but they must like it, because they almost always start purring as soon as I do it.

I forgot to mention about Pink’s eyes in yesterday’s post. Basically, the vet doesn’t know what’s going on. She says it’s probably not herpes, because it would be unusual for only one in the litter to have it. Her eyes aren’t goopy or bothering her, and there’s no corneal abrasion. She said that it’s possible that Pink is just more sensitive to her environment, and suggested a few things to try. For now, we’re giving her Chlorpheniramine, and Lysine. I think it might be helping, but I’m not quite sure. I’ll probably be better able to tell after a few more day.

All the kittens are getting Lysine right now, as a matter of fact. A cold/ virus started making the rounds with our cats, back before we let the Cookies out of their room. We hoped that it wouldn’t spread to the Cookies, but of course it did. It doesn’t seem to be hitting them as hard as it did Spanky and Miz Poo, and it doesn’t seem to be all of them, but we’ll see if it really develops into anything in the next few days. The Wonkas don’t seem to be affected so far, though I’ve heard one or two sneezes from a couple of them. I’m hoping like hell it doesn’t spread to them!

(And if you guys have any advice on lessening the length/ severity of a virus in cats/ kittens, I’m all ears!)


Pretty Cookie in the sun.


I believe there was a hiss from Spanky right after this picture was taken.


Meezers, but no Tuxie. (Wouldn’t “Tuxie and the Meezers” be an excellent band name?)


Orange and The Brick.

When I took Pink to the vet, I put Hydrox in the carrier with her, as her travel buddy. After the vet had examined Pink, I made her hold Hydrox (she laughed when I told her we call him “The Brick”), and she was amazed at what a solid, heavy cat he is. He’s got such big paws and such long legs, that I think he’s really going to be a big cat. He’s certainly headed that way!

 

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The cold started with Sugarbutt. I’m calling him Typhoid Suggie. (What? You don’t pile your dining room table with cat beds and clean laundry with the intention to fold it and put it away (or find places for the cat beds), only to leave it all piled there for days?)

 

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Previously
2008: I’m off to get my boobs squooshed!
2007: Sitting in the portal, waiting for the mother ship to arrive.
2006: No entry.
2005: No entry.
2004: Meester Boogers howled even more forlornly.
2003: I’ll be ONE OF THOSE FUCKING PEOPLE WHO WALKS AROUND SMELLING LIKE CAT PEE WITHOUT KNOWING IT!
2002: Lay on it!
2001: Fred smiled his asshole smile.
2000: No entry.
1999: No entry.