Keith and the Girl to listen on on my iPod this weekend – a weekend spent entirely in the damn kitchen – I might have gone a wee bit mad.
Saturday, first thing, I made jalapeno jelly. Now, I know that I’ve mentioned many times that I don’t like jalapenos and I don’t like green peppers, and this jalapeno jelly has three green (bell) peppers in it and seven jalapenos. I made the jelly – it’s a fairly easy recipe – and I processed it in a water bath canner, and when the jars were cooling on the table, Fred could wait no longer, and he demanded that we open a jar, so we did. He tried a spoonful and made a considering face.
“The vinegar gives it a zing,” he said. “Here, try it!” Reluctantly, I gave it a try, and I LOVED it. I got out the Ritz crackers and ate several of them with jalapeno jelly on top, and finally had to leave the kitchen lest I eat every last bit of the jar of jelly. We ended up with a dozen jelly jars of the stuff, and Saturday night talked about making a few more batches and selling ’em on eBay, but an in-depth discussion of the cost of buying jars and pectin and having to ship stuff showed that people would have to pay something like $10 per jar (including shipping) just to cover the costs of buying all the supplies, and that’s a lot to ask for a jelly jar of jalapeno jelly, so I don’t think we’re going to.
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Also on Saturday, I finally got around to adding vinegar to the habanero hot sauce, and Fred tested it, exclaimed “Now THAT’S what I’m talkin’ about!” and proclaimed it a success. We have – I shit you not – 26 habaneros in the refrigerator, and we talked about making and selling habanero hot sauce, but it’s another case of having to charge too much just to recoup the cost of making the stuff, so I don’t see that happening, either.
I’m amazed at how many peppers are still coming in. I thought peppers really liked it hot, and it’s cooled down a bit lately, but the peppers are coming in like crazy.
What else did I do on Saturday? Oh, right – I blanched and peeled a big-ass box of tomatoes (bought at a local produce stand, because our tomatoes are done for the year) and then let them simmer for several hours to make tomato sauce. I peeled and cored a big bag of apples – also bought at the produce stand – and made apple sauce. At some point in there, I threw together what we’ve taken to calling Tex-Mex for dinner, and I washed approximately one hundred and forty-three thousand dishes, wiped down the counter a thousand times, and yelled at Spot to go away ’cause I didn’t have any goddamn food for him.
After dinner, I made a batch of ice cream with our new ice cream maker. We had banana ice cream (I made vanilla ice cream and added three ripe liquified bananas to it) and it was pretty good, but both Fred and I agreed that it was a little too greasy and in the future I think we’re going to try frozen yogurt instead, since that’s what we’re used to.
Sunday I hit the ground running, taking my shower as soon as I got up, scooping out the litter boxes, and giving the kittens their medication (more on that in the next section), so I could get started on the shit I needed to get done in the kitchen. Once the usual morning chores were done (and the first load of laundry was washing), I chopped up cucumbers and green peppers and onion to make sweet pickle relish. I think I mentioned that Fred did a second planting of cucumbers, and the cucumbers started coming in with a vengeance, and I would surely like to go back a few months and kick my ASS for even suggesting that he do a second planting. What kind of fucking idiot AM I, anyway?
(I informed him, yesterday, that he should feel free to pull up the cucumber plants, because I’ll shoot dead the next person who brings any cucumbers into my house.)
Once the stuff for sweet pickle relish was chopped on left to soak, I got out the tomato sauce I’d made Saturday, put it on the stove, and threw a couple of packages of mushrooms, a few bay leaves, some Italian Seasoning, a couple of cans of tomato paste, and salt into the pot, and let it simmer for a few hours.
I put the water bath canner on to boil, then went upstairs to put the kittens in the carrier, put them in the bathroom, and vacuumed the hell out of their room. I vacuumed it on Friday after two weeks of NOT vacuuming it, and I got up so much cat hair and dust and litter that I swore I’d never let it go that long again. Poor kittens, having to live in that filth. I mean, it wasn’t SO bad because I’d been getting the worst of it up with a hand vacuum, but a hand vacuum really can’t compare to a real vacuum.
I put the kittens back in their room (when they exited the carrier, they did the something’s-different-what’s-different-something’s-different slink around the room, and I left them alone, and went off and vacuumed the rest of the house.
I finished the vacuuming, saw that the water bath canner was pretty close to boiling, and put the applesauce on the stove to heat up. I ended up with one quart and one pint jar of applesauce, and given the cost of the apples, I’m thinking that applesauce from the store is cheaper. Also, less of a pain in the ass.
(I’m going to make apple crisp and vanilla frozen yogurt for dessert next weekend. That’s my favorite thing about Fall, the apple crisp.)
Once the applesauce was processing, I drained the cucumbers, etc for the sweet pickle relish, made that, and by the time the applesauce was done, the sweet pickle relish was made and in jars ready to be processed. Although the recipe told me I’d get about 8 half-pint jars of relish, I ended up with two pints of relish. How does that translate, I ask you?
With the pickle relish processing, I decided the spaghetti sauce was ready to go, so put the pressure canner on to boil, did some dishes, cleaned up the kitchen, and then put the spaghetti sauce in jars, took the pickle relish out of the canner to cool, put the spaghetti sauce in the pressure canner to process, sliced eggplant into slices, sprinkled them with salt, and put them in the colander to drain.
When the spaghetti sauce was done processing, I rinsed the eggplant off, breaded it, and put it in the oven to cook. When it was done, I let it cool off, bagged it up, and put it in the freezer.
I feel like I never stopped doing shit this weekend, but I look in the refrigerator, and I want to shoot myself. Sitting there glaring expectantly is a metric ton of jalapenos, habaneros, and green peppers, and I don’t know what the fuck I’m going to do with the fucking things.
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Next year, I am told, he wants to “experiment” with “different peppers” and “different kinds of salsa”, and to that I say: you go right ahead, motherfucker. HAVE FUN.
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“How about now? Is it time for the snuggle now?”
“NO.”
Good Lord . . kitty c-diff is what that is 🙁 Having just gone through c-diff myself I can certainly relate! People take metronidazole too just a larger dose.
Robyn, try a little cream cheese on the cracker before adding the hot pepper jelly. Jars of hot pepper jelly sell for $8.oo around here at the fall festivals and they are small jars. loved the pictures of the kitties. I don’t think that I have ever seen an ugly cat. with all the canning and freezing this year, you may not have to do as much next year. You could open a roadside stand or join the local Farmers Market. Try not to work so hard, please.
I made some jalapeno jelly that had cider vinegar in it and it is fantastic — something about the sour flavor is so much better than the usual bland sweet kind.
I worked on apples this weekend too. Made a pie and some roasted sweet potato and apples last night, might be making applesauce this week for the freezer.
Hope you find something to do with the peppers, seems like there’s always way too many and beyond salsa and jelly I’m at a loss. . .
Have you tried a dab of cream cheese with the jalapeno jelly on a wheat thin? Heaven.
Robyn, the fund for Aaron is up to $2200 as of this morning! Thank you so much for linking to it last week, we had over 300 visitors coming from Bitchypoo. You made a tremendous difference and I very much appreciate it!
If they wouldn’t pay $10, then you’re not marketing right. 😉 Go to the dollar store and get a bunch of cheap raffia and fabric to “dress up” the jars, make some sort of fancy-looking label (I bet a creative reader could design something perfect) and print on your own printer, and use keywords like “organic,” “country-grown,” or “hand-made.” If you sold on Etsy as well as eBay, I think you could easily make that money back – and if you didn’t, it’s not as though the jelly would go to waste, would it? 😉
You could also print out a few “recipes” (mix with cream cheese for a “Spicy Spread” to roll in tortillas, etc.), and adding the booklet would probably ensure that you’d make the money back.
Just a quick check on e-bay showed that there are people selling jars of jalapeno jelly for $5, shipping and handling is about $5 so I think you’d have no problem selling them. Why don’t you get Fred to make up a little fruit/veg stand and put them out at the end of the driveway, do you think the honor system would work around there?
The summers we got really serious about vegetable gardening and canning were over 15 years ago but I still have vivid memories of those LOOOONNNNG days in the kitchen. That’s when I became a tennis fan because some exciting US Open matches really helped to provide diversion.
It doesn’t surprise me that the addition of vinegar made for a tasty salsa/sauce because I discovered Valentina hot sauce when I went to language school in Cuernavaca and our host family served it. It’s a very popular brand there (if not, the most) and it has a definite vinegar tang.
My mom makes some to-die-for red pepper jelly — perfect on egg rolls!
I think those peppers would look lovely hanging from string, festooning your busy and productive kitchen!
Don’t even get me started on selling things off the driveway via the honor system. We tried that this weekend with eggs, and had ourselves a load of FAIL.
Stephen King’s The Stand was on t.v. last night. Of course it made me think of you guys. M-O-O-N that spells peanut butter and jelly sandwich!
Ahem, and where is the entry on egg selling??? Hmm? Hmm? Don’t keep us in suspense!
Robyn, Robyn, Robyn! Surely you know by now that to get a cat to sit down sooner, you must simply lean over and sniff their ass!
My vote for the hot peppers? Learn how to dry them on strings. People make wreaths out of them and everything. They sell for a fortune and would not be as hard to ship as glass jars! Every Yuppie in the City wants one of them thar dried red chili pepper strands!
Hi Robyn,
I bought the same ice cream maker for my boyfriend last Christmas but we also didn’t care for the taste of the ice cream – to me it was awfully metallic tasting. We haven’t tried making frozen yogurt though so I’d love to know how yours comes out.
Oh Robyn, your posts make me so hungry these days. I’m hoping you can help me with a dilemma that’s plagued me for years. We have that exact same ice cream maker and would love to use it — but we can’t find the manual! Is it simple to use? Any tips? Thank you for any advice!
hey, I’ve got the same ice cream maker too! And stacee, I lost the manual too, but was able to find it on the Cuisinart website, here.
Robyn, I am jealous of your beautiful peppers. If I had that bounty, I’d try making a slow-cooking vegetable chili out of a good bunch of them.
Poor kittens and now they’re going to be expecting snacks whenever you visit. 😉
I’d make some stuffed peppers with the green ones and ditto on the cream cheese with the pepper jelly. Yum!
I’d pay $15 with shipping…I’m just sayin. $20 if you throw Maryanne in the box with it!
After reading about what-all you did this weekend, I needed a lie-down. 🙂
I was going to say please let me know if you ever find an answer for the cat-standing-there question, but Miss Pink answered it. Not that I’m tempted to TRY that solution anytime soon, but at least I know the answer!
Also, I wanted to tell Celestial I was THRILLED with the inside scoop on Shmayalan’s new movie. I’m a huge fan of his movies and love hearing any news about them.
I’m sorry, but when did you get taken over by Betty Crocker, Robyn? Has Fred actually killed the real you and replaced with a Robotic Becky Homecky?? Listen to you spending all weekend slaving away in the kitchen!! HA!!!
Speaking of Betty Crocker, you might enjoy the book “Finding Betty Crocker”. Fascinating book.
> Sitting there glaring expectantly is a metric ton of jalapenos, habaneros, and green peppers, and I don’t know what the fuck I’m going to do with the fucking things.
Sounds like salad to me.
I think when cats are standing with their backsides to you, they are spraying some chemical in the air that marks their territory. Or maybe that’s a digusting myth I picked up somewhere.
thanks so much, quirkybook!
Drying the peppers in a good idea! Also – next year, try Serrano peppers. they are awesome in guac! 🙂
Poor, poor ‘Lil Miss Stinkerbelle….. I think there should be a mandatory snuggle time… especially when you are as lovely as she is !
Have you thought about renaming them shittens, instead of kittens? 😉
just slice and dehydrate the peppers. Keep them in your vacuum-seal bags for whenever you need to add some peppers to something. Eh?