Say!!!
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I got up early this morning to take Fred to work, because I have an appointment this afternoon on the other side of Huntsville that I want him to go to with me, and I would prefer to just drive home together after the appointment rather than have to drop him off at his office to get his car, or drive home alone. So I used his car to drop him off at work then come home, and this afternoon I’ll pick him up at work, we’ll go to the appointment and drive home together.
Convoluted enough for ya?
Anyway, I got up early to take Fred to work. We left a little earlier than he usually does because he wanted to stop at Lowe’s for steel wool (I swear, he’s gone to Lowe’s every single day this week. He’s turning into such a GUY.) and to stop at his favorite coffee place to (can ya guess?) get coffee.
I dropped him off and headed for home. At one of the many red lights I had to stop at on the way home, I looked around me and realized I was surrounded on all four sides by plumbing trucks. Apparently 7 am is when the plumbing trucks head from Huntsville toward Madison, and they were all around me. I suddenly felt like I was in an episode of The Sopranos, and the doors of all the trucks were about to fly open and I’d see a bunch of angry plumbing southern
goombahs pointing silencer-laden guns at my head.
But the light turned green and I breathed a sigh of relief.
You really don’t want to fuck with the Plumbing Mafia.
* * *
I was in the grocery store the other day, and saw that there are a couple of new – “bold”, according to the packages – flavors of Tic T@cs. Since I’m always concerned about breathing bad breath on other people, I bought a pack of the “bold” fruit flavored Tic T@cs to carry around in my purse.
When I got home I put the groceries away, and grabbed up the container of Tic T@cs to give them a try.
They were AWFUL. Now, I’ve never actually tasted boiled ass myself, but the “bold” fruit flavored Tic T@cs were pretty much what I’d expect boiled ass to taste like. I spit out the one in my mouth… and immediately tried a second one to be sure it was as assy-tasting as the one I’d previously had in my mouth.
It was.
“Bold” Fruit Flavored Tic T@cs – two thumbs down.
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When we were in Mennonite country last weekend, Fred held up a jar of apple butter and asked if I wanted to get it. I’m always willing to try just about any fruit-based thing that they sell up there – I LOVE their strawberry jam; I don’t eat much jam these days, but every now and then I’ll eat some – so I said he should buy it.
That evening when we got home, he tried a spoonful of it out of the jar, and gave me a small spoonful of it. It was very, very good, which didn’t surprise me, since the ingredients were apples, apple butter, sugar, and… something else I don’t recall and am too lazy to go look.
Monday evening I was hungry and wanted something to tide me over ’til snack time at 7. I looked through the refrigerator and saw the apple butter, and decided I wanted some of that. I didn’t want a spoonful of it, though – I wanted to eat it on something. I looked around for something to eat it on.
Toast? No. I didn’t want that much. Half a bagel? No. I definitely didn’t want
that much. I opened the pantry and looked around, and then I saw the box.
Melba toast. Apple butter on melba toast sounds kinda good, right? I pulled the box out and looked at it, and that’s when I realized it wasn’t just any melba toast – it was
onion melba toast. I started to put the box back, then stopped and reconsidered.
I’ve been known to eat (light) strawberry cream cheese on onion bagels, and it is DAMN FINE (light cream cheese, low-carb bagels, don’t need any “should you be eating that” comments, thanks). So maybe apple butter on onion melba toast would be equally as DAMN FINE.
I’m here to tell you, folks. It’s not damn fine. It’s not fine. It’s on the other side of the room from “fine”, curled up in a corner and sobbing for its Momma.
It tastes, in fact, what I imagine boiled ass would taste like.
Apple butter on its own? YUMMY. Two thumbs up! Apple butter on onion melba toast? Two thumbs down!
* * *
I am concerned about Maddy. She’s had several bouts of diarrhea, and she’s not been eating as much as she should. I consulted with the shelter manager, who suggested giving Maddy something called “Reb0und”, which has L-glutamine in it and helps to stop diarrhea. She also recommended starting Maddy on Alb0n, which treats diarrhea and coccidia. So I met up with her and got the Reb0und and the Alb0n.
Last night, Maddy just flat-out didn’t want to drink that Reb0und. I tried and tried to get her to eat, but she wasn’t interested, and since she had just eaten a few hours earlier I gave up. Her urine was perfectly fine, and she had a little squirt of diarrhea, but she was bright-eyed and very interested in exploring, so I let her explore for a while, then put her up. I gave her her first dose of Alb0n.
This morning I walked into the kitten room to find that she’d had a bout of diarrhea in the middle of the night, with a small amount of blood in it. That didn’t worry me so much, because bloody diarrhea can be a sign of coccidia, which I was already treating with the Alb0n. I pulled her out of the carrier and cleaned her up, then offered her the bottle of Reb0und. She flat-out refused to eat any of it, and after a while I came back downstairs and made her a bottle of formula, which I – after a LOT of coaxing – got her to eat 2/3 of a Tablespoon’s worth. She did a little bit of exploring and remained fairly bright-eyed and perky.
My concern is that since Monday she’s lost almost half an ounce. I don’t know if that’s due to the diarrhea and once the Alb0n kicks in she’ll be okay, or what. Half an ounce is a lot for a little kitten to lose, and so I emailed the shelter manager about it and am waiting to hear back. It worries me that she ate less than a Tablespoon of food this morning, since her first morning feeding is when she usually eats the most, around 2 Tablespoons.
So I keep peeking in at her (she’s laying in her cage snuggled with the stuffed monkey) and worrying about her, because that’s the way I am. I’m a worrywart. I’m sure she’ll be fine once the Alb0n kicks in, but if y’all want to send “Knock it off, Maddy, and stop worrying your Momma” thoughts in this general direction, maybe they’ll help.
Maddy and Miz Poo come face-to-face over Tigger. And then Miz Poo ran away from the terrifying kitten.
“Are you my mother? You’re not my mother! You’re a Tigger!”
She’s more interested in biting than actually eating.
Maddy smiles. ‘Cause it’s warm under there, and there’s lots of bare skin to dig her claws into!
All of today’s uploaded pictures are
here.
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Yawny reader pet pics!
This is reader Blair’s 5 month-old kitten, Gwen. Blair says, I DARE ANYONE TO BEAT THIS ONE IN CUTENESS! That’s quite a challenge – she’s awfully cute! She kind of looks like she’s yelling “Mom! I can’t believe you got me The Simpsons! It’s what I always wanted!”
This is Anne’s Mini. Anne says, When she’s not unhinging her jaw or being a pain in the ass, she kind of looks like a girly Sugarbutt. I see the resemblance. And Sugarbutt, too, very much enjoys being a pain in the ass. They’re soulmates!
This is Teresa’s Buddy. Teresa says, My almost 12 yr old cat Buddy yawns all the time, but I have never been able to catch him at it when holding my camera.
And, His almost 1yr old sister Reverb would get jealous if I didn’t show off her as well. Here she is in HUNT mode.
Y’all have got some seriously cute cats. I love the pictures you guys share with me! Thanks for sharing, Blair, Anne, and Teresa! The rest of you – keep ’em coming.
* * *
Sleepin’ Sugs.
* * *
Previously
2005: “GodDAMN you, Mister Boogers!” I yelled.
2004: “This book makes me want to have a baby!” I said to Fred when I was about halfway through the book. “Let’s have a baby!”
2003: No entry.
2002: Gag city.
2001: I think you know what I’m thinkin’.
2000: I’d like to return to my regularly scheduled life, please.]]>
Cinnamon.
were they the lemon lime bold ones? because thoses shits be nastay!!!! I too spit them out. Not even Aimee the Cat wanted to play with the box of them! And I am happy to see you feeding Maddy with pinkies out!
Did you get a new camera? Those look good, all yours do, but slightly different, crisper maybe.
Jenn: I don’t think they were lemon/ lime. They were in a red container, and it just said “BOLD FRUIT FLAVORED” on it. Gah. SO GROSS.
Audri: Not a new camera, but I did mess with the settings a little, so maybe that made the difference!
I hope Maddy gets better soon!
Apple butter on raisin toast is the food of the gods.
Sending good thoughts Miss Maddy’s way. Hope she starts eating soon.
I LOVE apple butter. I got hooked on it while on a trip to Tennessee, so now I am in constant search of a good jar of it. We eat it with pork chops, so yummy!
What does Maddy think of the big cats? Is she scared of them? I love the pic of The Poo glaring at her.
Maybe it’s just cuz Miss Maddy is teething. Human babies get diarrhea and don’t well when they are teething. Any drooling going on? Ha ha!
Maybe you should give her something to chew on that will help those toothies come in. . .
Hope she’s feeling well soon. Poor baby – only has Mz Robyn to love and protect her. Oh wait – she could not be in better hands!
Oh yeah – just wait ’til those teeth come in. You think those claws are sharp. Ouch!
Reverb has a Tubby face – especially her eyes!
I’m notice a “boiled ass” theme in this entry….
“I spit out the one in my mouth… and immediately tried a second one to be sure it was as assy-tasting as the one I’d previously had in my mouth.”
That was the funniest thing I”ve ever read.
Here’s a tip you might try for Maddie’s feeding — get a small syringe (from the shelter lady or pet store or vet), the kind used for needles but without a needle. Put some of her formula in it, and she might suck it right out the tip…or you can squirt a little in her mouth (not down her throat) and she’ll consume more. I did this when Kitten was being bottle-fed, and believe it or not, she preferred the syringe to the bottle-nipple. Soon I could put her whole amount of formula in it, and she’d suck it right out of that syringe. I loved seeing the plunger go down, down…as she sucked the food out, knowing she was really getting her nutrition.
Another tip: When Maddie’s teeth come in, be VERY careful if you are still feeding with the bottle-nipple. Those sharp kitten teeth can cut the soft nipple in two, and she can swallow the piece of rubber before you know what has happened!
Coccidia is most likely the culprit causing the runny stools, and if that’s cleared up, all will be well. You might also get the Reb0und down her by mixing it with formula, and feeding through the syringe.
It’ll all work out…but it CAN be a bear while you’re being a “mama” to a motherless kitten!!
The boiled ass comments made me think of what we call my husband’s white russion concoction. He doesn’t mix the way all the recipes say to and he makes a full bottle size at one time so we’ve nicknamed it “Ass in a bottle.”
One of my cats is going through an “I don’t want to eat” faze also. I know how worrisome you can get over it.
Sending get well and good thoughts Maddy’s way.
Robyn, Did you get my yawning cat photos? Just checking. If not, I can resend them.
Poor Maddie. She is so cute. Our kittens are almost 6 months old now and are teenagers and not cute little kittens any more. Still, they are very, very cute.
I second Cara’s suggestion on syringe feeding. When my chihuahua was so sick a few years ago and refused to eat, my sister (a vet) suggested it. It’s sort of a gentle form of force-feeding; if you squirt the soft food or formula inside their mouths, they have to swallow. It worked like a charm on Charlie, who’s sitting on my foot right now demanding attention.
Maddy, stop worrying your mama!
Apple butter on graham crackers = YUM!!! The pic of Maddy and Miz Poo is adorable. I love how it looks like Maddy is looking up at her in awe.
I was wondering about your camera, too. Those pictures are kick-ass fine. Course it doesn’t hurt that Maddy is the cutest kitten ever …
Apple butter on homemade bread (with regular butter spread on it first). One of many things I ate as a kid (and I wonder why I was so fat).
I assume Maddy has been tested for worms… that could make her fell less than well… Sending healing thoughts your way for the cute little angel.
Get Well/Stop Worrying thoughts coming your way!
Those bold tic tacs are HORRIBLE. I agree. I had to toss them.
Reminds me – Mark and I were eating taffy last night – I’d pull one out and go – pink looks tastey! and throw it across the room to him. Well, we tried, “pretty blue with the white swirl” and I was making a face…and he was making a face. When I spit mine out, I asked, “Does that one taste like a public bathroom smells?” He agreed.
UGH!
And just so you know, I’m now carrying my camera around waiting for one of those cats of mine to yawn. They are fast!
Awww…poor Maddy. I also agree with using something else other than a bottle. I had a cat with diabetes that I had to force-feed for a couple of weeks and I used something similar to an eye dropper.
As long as you put it in the back of their throat, their reflex is to swallow.
I know that cat’s livers take over and produce fatty acids when they aren’t eating to make them feel “full”, which causes them lose weight and not feel hungry.
Just a thought or two.
Did you give Maddy the amoxicillin you picked up several days back? I don’t know about cats, but I know antibiotics can lead to diarrhea in people, they kill the good bacteria in the digestive tract. Whatever it is that is causing her diarrhea, I hope it stops soon and she’s doing better. She is such an adorable kitten.
I am not a kitty expert but one thing I always think when I see a picture of Maddy is that her eyes look glassy, don’t you think? Isn’t that a sign of a respiratory infection?
(((Maddy))) Sending vibes your way! Wow, she’s SO TINY! Miz Poo looks like a giant checking her out!
Maddy really does look she’s smiling in that one picture. God, she’s cute. Can’t wait for the diarrhea update later.
Can you tell us where we can watch missed shows online? I know you mentioned it before and I had book marked it but then the hard drive failed. I missed the first half of Biggest Loser and would like to see it.
No wonder it tasted like boiled ass. Being of the mennonite persuasion, one must never eat apple butter on anything other than zweiback (freshly baked).
We don’t do bagels, or onion melba toast, but we have been known to eat pickled pigs feet. We are a picky lot!
Hey Robyn….
I work with crazy Nance and she has been showing me pictures of this perfect little angel kitten. I can’t believe that after you has nursed this little beauty that you can give her away….What kind of mother are you?? You are all she knows. You will damage her for life you know.
Oh nevermind for this show, nbc has it online. lol
Diane: I work with crazy Nance…
How do you manage that from over in Virginia, when everyone knows Nance is in Pennsylvania.
Damn, IP address logging is a bitch, isn’t it?