Solitude by Edwin McCain being the biggest tear-causing culprit of the day).
And none of you bastards nominated me for a Pulitzer for the BEST PICTURE EVER, so HERE YOU GO AGAIN.
How can you not die from the cute?
Seriously, this fucking PMS is pissing me off. My fucking hormones are pissing me off. If I go off the pill I have my period closer and closer together until I’m on a one-week-off/ three-weeks-on schedule. If I go ON the pill, I’m on a three weeks off/ one week on schedule, but I also have breakthrough bleeding at random, inopportune times.
AND MY BOOBS HURT.
I knew my hormones were going to go all fucked up and floopy after the surgery but this is FOR THE BIRDS. I’m tempted to make an appointment with the gynecologist and demand she just yank everything out, but I’m sure that’d just make everything worse.
FUCKING HORMONES.
Maybe I just need to take up some good ol’ heroin.
KIDDING.
* * *
And fucking WordPress with their fucking new version, now all the comments y’all leave come to my mailbox as if they were mailed from bitchypoo @ wordpress.com, which means that GODDAMN GMAIL lumps them all into the same “conversation” and so I can’t file single comments away into my archives without filing them ALL away (I file comments that I intend to answer in the future) and I hate Gmail and their goddamn insistence on lumping emails into “conversations”, it REALLY PISSES ME OFF AND I FIND IT UTTERLY USELESS.
And I can’t figure out how to fix it in WordPress. THANKS WORDPRESS! YOU GODDAMN SUCK!
(If anyone knows how to fix that, let me know, would you? THANKS.)
* * *
I pounded down so much low-carb hot cocoa yesterday that my skin is probably going to go from golden yellow (though to be honest I don’t think I’m yellow anymore; certainly not nearly as yellow as I was a few weeks ago) to warm golden brown.
PMS, did I mention? It’s like, I NEED something chocolatey-tasting, but anything really chocolatey (3 Musketeers, M&Ms, Snickers) is going to make me sick, so I have to make do. It’s a pale imitation of what I (or rather the PMS monster) really wants, but it takes the edge off the craving at least.
* * *
As I was chopping the mushrooms to have sauteed mushrooms and onions over hamburger patties for dinner Sunday night, I heard Mister Boogers run through the cat door. I thought nothing of it, since he does it sixty billion times a day, but then I heard him growling, and looked over to see him standing in the hallway, something in his mouth, growling.
“Baby,” I said with an edge of annoyance as I didn’t for one minute pause in my mushroom-chopping duties, “he’s got something. And I think it’s dead.”
Fred came in from the computer room and had one hell of a time prying Mister Boogers’ jaws apart. As he tried, I could see that it was a bird he – Mister Boogers, that is – had in his mouth, and that not only did he have a bird, he had it by the feet.
Fred got Mister Boogers’ jaws apart, and the bird took off flying down the hallway.
“I guess it’s not dead,” I said helpfully, still chopping. I listened as what sounded like a herd of elephants went running up the stairs, and then I heard a door slam. I stopped chopping long enough to open the back door wide, then went back to my chopping.
Eventually, Fred came down with the bird cradled between his hands and his stomach.
“The door’s open,” I pointed out.
He went out back and the bird took off.
“We chased that thing up the stairs, and Mister Boogers leapt up and caught it in mid-air. I was impressed!” Fred reported.
That Boogers is such a little bastard.
This morning he brought a cricket into the house and began dismembering it. He yanked off a leg and let it crawl halfway across the kitchen before toying with it again. I didn’t witness this myself; the spud was in the kitchen getting her lunch to take to school when she reported it to me. I told her to get a piece of paper towel and toss the cricket into the toilet and flush it. Better to have it die quickly than be tortured by a Boogery bastard, right?
When I went into the bathroom just a few minutes ago, I found that the spud had yanked about a foot of paper towels off the roll to pick the cricket up and carry it into the bathroom.
She left a cricket leg in the middle of the kitchen floor.
My guess is that unless Tommy or Mister Boogers suddenly desires a mid-day snack, that cricket leg will stay there ’til I vacuum the entire house on Thursday.
* * *
I have an appointment this afternoon with the doctor who performed my weight loss surgery. It’s my six-month follow-up appointment, which was originally scheduled for a little closer to my actual six-month date – I’m now closer to my seven-month date – but they had to reschedule me.
I’m not looking forward to the appointment, only because I’m sure I’ll have to explain what’s going on with my bilirubin/ gall bladder/ whatever and I’m SO FUCKING BORED with the whole freakin’ topic. And I’ll have to inform him that I’m having an MRCP tomorrow, and I can’t fucking remember without looking at the piece of paper where I wrote it down whether it’s called an MRCP or an MRCE. Isn’t an MRCE some kind of test you have to take to get into medical school or law school or something?
I’m just tired of the whole fucking thing. I want the issue figured out and solved – it’s been a freakin’ month, now – and whatever steps need to be taken, taken.
IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?
On the up side, they scheduled the MRCP in Madison and it’ll take me about five minutes to get there. Hopefully it won’t be too scary or traumatic.
Either way, y’all know I’ll be reporting back as to how it went. I don’t expect to hear from the doctor about the results until sometime next week. I’m hoping that the MRCP shows what’s going on so I don’t have to have a liver biopsy.
Liver biopsy. Doesn’t the thought just give you the ookies?
* * *
Tomorrow’s entry is going to be another question-answering entry (at least for part of the entry). If you have a burning question, leave it in the comments!
* * *
Sugarbutt makes himself at home.
“HEY! Turn it DOWN! I’m trying to SLEEP over here!”
Spot, looking paranoid.
“Let us out! LET US OUT!”
All of today’s uploaded pictures are
hither.
* * *
Previously
2005: So, that’s why I won’t be updating this week.
2004: No entry.
2003: And for the rest of the drive I would occasionally call him “Fo’-Thray”.
2002: Surely they can hear the thunder of Tubby approaching from miles away – you’d think they’d hide somewhere he can’t go, like under the shed or on the other side of the fence.
2001: That’s me, an expert at reading between the lines!
2000: It gives her a rakish air.]]>
Hee. I didn’t look too closely to that lat picture and thought for a second that the cat was on the ceiling.
Hee.. the test to get into medical school is the MCATs. Medical College Admission Test.
Hope you feel better tomorrow!
-Nancy
Hmmm, I did nominate you – They haven’t contacted you yet????? Beautiful baby kitty….
Hope your week gets better!!!!
When you’re PMSing, do you cry over Century 21 commercials? I do, and I’d like to know that I’m not alone in that freakishness. I miss being on birth control … I used to have a lovely pill that stopped my periods altogether. I had to stop taking it because of my blood pressure, and now my PMS and periods seem to get progressively worse every month.
Robin, I am re-discovering my Maine roots (genealogically speaking) and discovered a whole bunch ‘o distant relatives in Aroostock County, in the Weston area. Have you ever been that far north in Maine? I guess since I do not hunt, nor fish, nor snowmobile, there is not much reason for me to visit, eh? I asked if there was a nice hotel anywhere nearby, and you could have heard the laughter all the way to Alabama, I swear!
Have you ever heard of endometrial ablation? Its an outpatient procedure where they destroy your uterine lining. No more periods, and supposedly less PMS. I am going to look into as soon as I am done having kids.
Hey Robyn tell Fred to try this..
when my cat has a bird and won’t let got just hold their scruff firmly get up close and blow hard right up their nose! Sounds weird but they let go right away… works every time!
Clara- my girlfriend had the ablation thingy done and it did NOT stop her PMS. I repeat… DID NOT stop her PMS. It did nothing for her and they had to root around and take the whole mess out eventually anyway. Do tons of research before considering such drastic measures!
Robyn- I feel your pain on the PMS. When I PMS I want to act like the Bean and rip the legs of things except the legs belong to the A-hole who is pissing me off at the time. I do customer service for a living. Not good when PMSing. A-holes are everywhere!
I had that endometrial ablation, and..neither expected outcome was the case for me. I still bleed and I’m still a bitch. Of course that last part might be explained by noting that it was not PMS, but the first part is quite a disappointment.
New tagline for September – putting the bitch in bitchypoo? :0)
i have a question. i know you’ve probably said why before, but my parents are considering replacing the (old-ass) linoleum on their kitchen floor: why do you hate your stone floor?
My cat, Smudge, jumped 3 feet into the air this morning to catch a mayfly that was flying around our house. He got it. It was pretty impressive!!!!
Seeing the “yelling” pic of Mister Boogers made me think – you should have reader participation and ask for our best yawny pics of our kitties. Not best kitten pics b/c that clearly has been done (above) by YOU!
Okay, here’s my burning question…I am wondering what brand of kitty litter you use and how often you change it. And how many litter boxes do you have for 6 cats? I have three cats and have recently discovered the Tidy Cat crystals which I think are awesome! They cover the smell incredibly well and are easy to scoop clean everyday.(I don’t mean to sound like a commercial!) I hate the smell of regular kitty litter and tried every brand/type out there with no luck until now.
Hi Robyn,
I actually have a question that I have been wanting to ask you and since you declared tomorrow a question answering day………. what better time to ask. 🙂 I heard some where not long ago that losing weight helps you to think more clearly. Have you found that to be the case with you? Have you noticed that maybe you aren’t as forgetful as you might have been before?
Just wondering.
Thanks. 🙂
On the boobs hurting part of PMS – I have to say that that’s almost completely disappeared since I started taking Evening Primrose Oil every morning (one flavorless capsule with my multivitamin). Seriously. It’s been three years now; I went from excruciating pain every month – where putting on a bra makes you want to scream – to exactly two days of vague discomfort. Two. Days. in Three. Years. It’s awesome stuff!
On the Burning Question front – Since your surgery, I know you’ve been really active, even more so than you used to be. But how about your motivation? Are you finding it easier to get up and move now that you’re so much smaller? Or do you still have to talk to yourself just as sternly about hoisting it off the couch?
It IS the best picture ever! It REALLY IS! (Backing away slowly.) Heh. All kidding aside, my PMS was causing my family to consider moving out for a few days every month. Then I started taking one of those plant estrogen supplements. (Promensil, with red clover but no black cohosh.) It might be just a placebo effect, but I don’t feel like killing everyone who looks at me cross-eyed anymore. I still get a little weepy, but the killing urges? They have passed. I don’t know whether it’s OK to take those supplements if you’re not perimenopausal, but I doubt it could hurt.
While I could be selfish and admit that heroin induced entries would be DA BOMB, I will have to do the right thing and tell you, um, no. Don’t do it.
😉
That baby kitty pic is priceless, looks like a baby Sugarbutt!
Hope they get your gallbladder/liver mess figured out and fixed and that your hormones get righted quickly!
I can’t recall if you’ve mentioned having elevated liver enzymes, but if you do, I’ve heard milk thistle can help. I think Vitalady sells it, but I’m sure you can get it anywhere.
We have a small city here called Deer Park (saw your water bottles). That’s where Santa Ana was captured by Sam Houston.
Thanks for sharing the cuteness of kittens!
Also, I have a question, not really a burning one, but – you mentioned in the past buying some clothes from eBay as you’ve been losing weight. I’m losing weight now too, and I’m looking into cheaper ways to fill in the wardrobe as I drop sizes. Have you been pleased with the clothes you’ve bought off eBay so far? Did you only buy New With Tags stuff or used things too? Any other hints for inexpensive clothes?
Thanks!
good god – sugar butt is handsome. clone him!
Question — when you guys make the big move, will you still have a fenced-in area for the kitties to enjoy? I’d be a paranoid furbaby mom and worry about them wandering free through acres of land. Also, if you have a pesticide company come out, will you be asking about pet-safe treatment sprays?
Suggestion — I’ve been using an estrogen hormone patch called Vivelle Dot, and it has helped me more than anything else with PMS/mood swings and other “lady problems”, heh. It’s plant derived and bio identical, and not as dangerous as HRT pills. Maybe you could ask your doc(s) about trying it.
Hey Robyn,
You’re looking fabulous , by the way! You go girl!
Anyhow, I used to have that P.M.D.D. apparently. And HORRIBLE cramps.
I had 3 teen sons and all I had to do was say , in my Devil voice “I HAVE IT!”
and they would steer clear in fear! lol
So …few years ago …HYSTERECTOMY baby!!! The best thing in the world!
Come to find out had some fibroids….between that,the pain & the horrible p.m.s. and since my kids were grown…the doctor reccommended it and my insurance covered every last dime.
I still feel like doing cartwheels every time I walk down the tampon isle.
I’m assuming you mean a layer a foot thick off the paper towel roll. Because really, aren’t most paper towels about a foot long, anyway? =P
Ali M, your comment made me snort. I live in Baytown, which is 10 minutes from Deer Park, and did not even notice her water bottles.
Call me observant, huh?
Hi Robyn,
Congrats on your awesome weight loss! It’s been encouraging to see how you’ve progressed! Quick question, with all the weight loss are you having any trouble/issues with “extra” skin? Will you need to have some removed in the future?
I can commiserate with your hatred of Gmail’s insistence on lumping everything into conversations. It’s RIDICULOUS! But did you know that you can use Outlook Express for gmail just like any other e-mail? You just have to configure the POP settings. It is GREAT if you’re pretty much always on the same computer when you check your gmail. Then you only have to use the stupid web interface with the infernal conversations if you’re checking from another computer. Good luck!
Here is a question and if it is one that was already asked & answered I apologize and just ignore it. I am half brain dead lately.
What does your mother think of your weight loss?
Speaking from the grave (because I DIED FROM THE CUTE!!!), I have to say, that is the cutest damn kitten picture I have EVER seen!!!
“I guess it’s not dead,” I said helpfully, still chopping. I listened as what sounded like a herd of elephants went running up the stairs, and then I heard a door slam. I stopped chopping long enough to open the back door wide, then went back to my chopping.
I nearly spit applejuice out of my nose when reading this. Just the thought of that happening is making me crack up! 😀
I was wondering what Spud is doing after you move? Is she going to college or traveling? Is her dad coming to her high school graduation?
Please supply online DIY journal about the new house upgrades.
If you do foster the new kittens, we need a calendar for 2007. (hint hint)
Good luck with the medical tests.
My PMS got so bad it was lasting 2 WEEKS of the month. I went on anti-depressants.
Please please PLEASE have yourself tested for PeCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome, expecially if your prior menstrual history is one where you’d go months without a cycle. it messes up your hormones and causes menstrual problems. if left untreated, it can cause uterine cancer. you won’t find much online about it, but i do know there is some kind of blood test that can tell. i tried for years to tell the doc’s something was wrong, they all said it was because of my weight, and gave me birth control and diet plans. neither ever worked (except to make me the biggest PMS bitch around) and i had to have a hystorectomy 2 years ago because of a precancerous condition. please please PLEASE!!!