Kill Reality since it came on. A show comprised of reality stars who sit around and act like giant pains in the ass? GIMME SOME OF THAT.
So far I’m enjoying it, especially since Reichen can’t seem to keep his shirt on. That is one good-looking gay man, and I don’t give a shit if he’s gay or not; that diminishes my appreciation of his partial nekkidness not one iota.
It squicks me out, on the other hand, that anyone on the face of this earth could be ATTRACTED to Jonny Fairplay. I’d let Cape Fear DeNiro rub his liver lips all over my face before I’d so much as be in the same room as the repulsive Jonny Fairplay. WHO HAS THE STUPIDEST NAME ON THE FACE OF THIS PLANET, BY THE WAY.
Tanya (Tonya? Tonia? Ever how the fuck you spell it) is adorable, but my lord that girl has issues. Plus, she’s attracted to Jonny Fairplay, so clearly she’s completely insane.
I know nothin’ about Trishelle (I stopped watching all the Real World/ Road Rules shows and all combinations thereof around… let me think. I watched them somewhat steadily through to.. Hawaii? Were they in Hawaii? With the girl who had the drinking problem and they had the intervention? I missed a few seasons up to then, but that was the very last one I watched, anyway.), but she’s got the skank lines rolling off her, doesn’t she?
I found Tanya/ Tonya/ Tonia annoying until Trishelle showed up, and then all my annoyance was transferred to Trishelle.
My favorite part of the show thus far is when all the women were matter-of-factly sitting around talking about their boob jobs.
Oh, and if someone could smack Jenna Lewis really hard for me, I’d be ever so grateful. Where does the porn tape queen get off on feeling like she’s too good for Trishelle’s “scraps”, anyway?
(Jenna Lewis porn: the most boring porn in existence.)
* * *
Why has no one ever directed me toward the fabulous
I, Asshole? Is it because y’all think I spend too goddamn much time sitting on my fat ass in front of the computer? Because that’s true, but that’s no excuse. I had to up and discover her on my own, and I hold you all responsible for the fact that I spent two hours reading part of her archives yesterday instead of napping with the kittens.
I have such a hectic life that when I miss a two-hour kitten-induced nap, it makes a huge difference. Why, I’ll probably have to get 12 hours of sleep tonight instead of my usual 10, just to make up for it!
* * *
So, tell me this, y’all. Is it okay to eat kale raw, or will it have disastrous effects on my digestive system? I was thinking of adding some to my lunchtime salad to add some zing to it, but if I’ll be paying for it later in the day, I’ll give it a miss.
* * *
Last night Fred and I were laying in bed and I was singing that damn Big & Rich song that will NOT leave my head, and I came to the line about “gigging frogs”, and I had to stop and ask Fred just what exactly the hell gigging frogs might entail. I had an idea in the back of my mind somewhere that it involved nighttime and flashlights, but knew nothing beyond that.
Well. Apparently gigging frogs is going out at night with a flashlight and a three-pronged spear, shining the light to locate frogs, and STABBING THEM WITH THE SPEAR so you can take them home and eat frog’s legs.
That’s certainly romantic. I can understand why the girl in the song was so overcome with lust – between the frog-gigging, the introduction to the old bird dog, and the Willie Nelson songs, what girl wouldn’t be overcome?
I ran across
this site while I was searching for more information about gigging frogs (a search I gave up pretty quickly, ’cause I felt sorry for the damn frogs, minding their own business one minute and being stabbed by a spear the next), and check out
this line-by-line translation of the slang in the song. It makes me laugh, because I imagine a guy in a suit and tie in front of a whiteboard, saying “Now, in the line where Misters Big and Rich mention Willie Nelson, the point therein is that Wilie Nelson is a famous country singer. Gigging frogs, bird dogs and Willie Nelson are all associated with country people – the singer uses these activities to impress this woman that he is really a cowboy.”
I also particularly enjoy the translation of Radiohead’s
Creep. Seriously, who thought that it needed to be translated? It seems pretty forward to me. I’d think that most everyone knows that “so fuckin’ special” translates to “very special”, but I suppose I could be wrong on that score.
Speaking of frog legs, have I ever mentioned that two years ago when we went to Vicksburg, Mississsippi, I had frog legs a couple of times? (Actually, I see in
the entry I wrote about the trip that I did, in fact, I mention it.)
Which reminds me – Fred told me last night that he might have to go back to Vicksburg in the next month or two, and then he did the ha-ha-ha dance that goes “IIIIIIIII get to eat at the Huuuuuuuuungry Fishermaaaaaan, and youuuuuuuuuuuuu donnnnnnnnnn’t, ’cause you said you never wanted to set foot in Mississippi agaaaaaaain, ha-ha-ha!”
I felt not one iota of jealousy, because Mississippi in August is hot as fuck, and I truly never want to go back there during the summer, if ever.
Nothing personal, Mississippians.
* * *
We had a gorgeous sunset last night.
* * *
I weighed the kittens last night. Would you believe that Rambo gained THIRTEEN OUNCES over the past week? That puts both of them well over two pounds, which means they can be spayed and neutered. They’re still recovering from their upper respiratory infections, though, so I’m going to wait until they’ve recovered to call and make the appointment.
We decided last night that, as piggy as he is, “Wilbur” would be a good name for Rambo. Fred also thinks that “Worm” would be a good name, too. Which I have to agree with, ’cause Rambo DOES look like a Worm. A good name for Jodie would be Nellie, ’cause she’s a nervous nellie. She’s not skittish, exactly, but any unexpected loud noises will send her running for cover under a chair or the couch.
I’m uncertain how this happened. We left the room, and Mister Boogers was asleep in the bed, and Rambo was snoozing on the couch. We came back ten minutes later, and this is what we saw.
Rambo really likes
Dog Blog.
No good can come of this.
What a pretty girl.
Jodie’s checking to see if anything’s going on at
Catie‘s. I think she has a crush on Seamus.
Chubby Girl Brigade makes Jodie giggle.
See? She’s giggling.
More giggles.
Rambo steals a piece of popcorn. And yes, he ate the entire thing. No wonder he’s gained 13 ounces in the last week!
It’s tiring work, all this napping.
All of today’s uploaded pictures (the ones you see above, and more) can be seen
here.]]>
That IS a gorgeous sunset! And I though something was horrible wrong with Rambo’s mouth until you clarified the culprit as popcorn. Maybe popcorn is why I, too, have gained… no wait, it’s probably more likely the chocolate malts.
Woo hoo, “I, Asshole” is back in bidness. She’s a hoot, thanks for linking her!
Robyn, I must thank you for your research on frog gigging. I, too, have had that Big & Rich song stuck in my head, and every time I heard it I would remind myself to look up what that meant. But I never did (even though I’m a librarian and research is pretty much my job). And now I don’t have to! Yay Robyn!
Incidentally, the nickname worm comes from Zilpha Keatley Snyder’s (and I didn’t spellcheck that) “The Witches of Worm”, a stunningly good book I read as a kid.
Rambo certainly reminds me of the mental image I have of the feline from that book. I’m sure he’s just as evil, down deep.
That book’s still in print, too, if’n anyone’s interested.
Mister Boogers and Rambo? I just went into sugar shock. That is the cutest picture evah!
Rambo looks just like a tiny kangaroo in that picture with the popcorn. How cute!
Forgot to ask for an update on Fred — is he feeling better? Any ass-wiping assistance happening over there? Heh.
I have been watching “Kill Reality” too.
Though I did FF through the last one some.
Have any idea how long it is supposed to run?
You hit the nail on the head with the Kill Reality comments for me…. I was thinking the same exact things… mind if I cut and past for my own blog LMSO just kidding ๐ Trishelle is quite the nastyness, she was on another reality TV show after The Real World, I’m trying to remember which one, (it may have been the Surreal Life, but don’t quote me, although I think it was) and she was quite the drunk/sleazy twit on there too.
Never tried raw Kale (is it even any good??), although I do know that if you do not peel celery well enough it can lead to bowel obstructions in Gastric Bypass patients… true that! LOL
And I will leave you with this… if you think that gigging frogs is hilare… try “Noodeling for Catfish”!!! Go ahead… google it… its about the dumbest most moronic thing that I think a man ever thought up. And yes, I said man… No woman would have ever said, “Hey, let me try to do this!” Duh! LMSOOOO!
The only Real World I saw was Chicago…and that Tonya was a train wreck….it was horrible, but I just had to watch. Always bitching about the black people scaring her, and her boobs, and her kidneys, and what was up with that mysterious old man that gave her money all the time?? And talking on the phone to Justin non stop??
Gads, I couldn’t stand to look at her again after that show. I hear from friends that she has been on 2 or 3 reality shows since. God Tonya,get a real job!! ack!
Well sorry I went off on a snit fit there.
Thanks for the kitty shots. Great ones, as usual.
And how is Fred? Tell him I said hey.
And, did you ever see that Starved episode yet, with the hydroflow colonic plot?? I still laugh when I think of it!!!!!!
Aww..I love the picture of Mister Boogers and kitty! So sweet!
Trashelle (misspelling intentional, hee!) was on Surreal Life, my FAVORITE trainwreck show. (I have an unnatural love for that show, it’s HILARIOUS.) Anyway, Trashelle is also now the commentator on Battle of the Network Reality Stars, which is similar to the old Battle of the Network Stars, so that’s also hilarious. She says things like, “Girl to girl, we’re both girls, we’re both girls who like boys…” Little person Charla from The Amazing Race is also on it, which is awesome.
I have never seen a cat eat popcorn before!
Oh yeah, I happened by Celebrity Poker Showdown last night, which had Charla, Trashelle AND Johnny Fairplay (EWWW!) on it. Trashelle was out first, and was actually lying on the couch in the Loser’s Lounge. Newsradio’s Dave Foley is one of the commentators, and he was clearly aggravated by Fairplay and even said that his trash-talking wasn’t making any sense, damn it! hahaha!!
Great kitty pics!
Poor Rambo — that position with Boog looks pretty stinky. And the popcorn pic? It looks like he’s got giant jibbers!!
I had forgotten about Jenna Lewis and her sex tape scandal and the one where she left her 7 yr old twins to elope with that dude she barely knew.
Yes this show is a trainwreck, I hate Jenna ever since Survivor and Jonny Fairplay? I didn’t realize that was his REAL last name? Or isn’t it? I feel stupid.
I knew Jodie was my favorite.
ROBYN, I have yet to find one other person watching Kill Reality. We simply must chat so we can hash out all the “Can you believe she didย?” and “I hateย!” and “Johnny Fairplay couldn’t be more disgusting if he was sniffing old lady panties in a nursing home.”
Also, I vote for Battle of the Blah Blah Blah Reality Stars (I can’t remember the actual name).
Ummmm…..Robyn? When did you get a *yellow* keyboard? That is too cool! (You’ve probably had it a looooong time and I just didn’t notice it.)
Be careful! I remember reading/hearing/ESPing somewhere that cats shouldn’t eat popcorn kernels. The fluffy white yummy part is okay, but not the hard, well, kernely part. I think they could choke, or it can get stuck in their throats, or something digestive or something. It’s also a possibility that I made this up and made myself believe it because I’m really paranoid!
Mr. Boogers’ butt smells like roses!
Mr. Boogers and Rambo was toofreakincute!
I love, love, love, love, LOVE that photo of Mr. Boogers and Rambo! My heart is melting!
I was just thinking that you have a lot of pictures of the cats/kittens yawning. And then I thought about how much cats sleep, and it all makes sense. ๐ If I had to be reborn as an animal, it would definitely be a cat. To have a cat’s life . . . . .
I love the Kitty Kaptions. Especially when Jodie is giggling. I giggled, too.
Robin, This is a completely out of the blue question. Once you mentioned having mild hair thining maybe due to your thyroid. I wondered what happened. I am experiencing the same thing. I had my thyroid tested which returned normal. At this point I feel crazy because every says they don’t see what I am talking about. Unfortunately this is causing me cocern than I would like to admit.
Otherwise, the little longish hair silvery gray kitty does my heart good every time you show her pix. Growing up the only kitty I went to the shelter and picked out looked just like her. Salem lived to 19yrs. Not to be over sappy but- She was my friend and I still miss her. Thank you for showing such kindness to these animals.
I stumbled across your site one day through SkinnyDaily and just love it to effing death. I think your cats are adorable and I love your sass.
And I agree; Johnny Fairplay is the slimiest thing out there and soooo undo-able, thanks.
Take care,
Hilly
Howdy, thanks for the name check. I am enjoying all these cat pictures. It’s nice to see someone who’s been flashing the general public with awesomeness for even longer than I have. You are old-skool. ๐