Y’all are some grumpy motherfuckers, aren’t you? Your comments yesterday cracked me UP.
I have to admit that loud chewers can get on my nerves, too. I can be guilty of chomping my gum too loudly (but usually only when I’m agitated!)
Lisa, I agree with you about Jorja Fox, she’s got quite the smackable face!
I have to agree with Leonore’s comment:
I teach writing and English lit at a community college. You know it’s bad when “could of” isn’t even the most annoying mistake anymore (though it will always produce the same apoplexy in me as it does in Robyn, I’m sure, as will their/there/they’re, your/you’re, and many others). See, there’s a new trend for people to forget that an essay is NOT, in fact, A CELL PHONE!! and so they feel perfectly comfortable writing such things as: “Their are ways u can help urself quit a bad habit coz sum ppl don’t know to quit and its bad to keep doing that habit.” The vein starts to twitch when I see the letter u sitting all by itself. I refuse to use it even on the very rare occasion that I text anyone on an actual call phone (maybe once every other month?) Even my 42-year-old sister is started to speak in text shortcuts! STOP IT! I SAID STOP!
The happiest day of my life (okay, maybe the happiest day of my week) was when I got a cell phone with a keyboard on it, so I can easily type out text messages without having to resort to “u” and “4” and “did u get ur msg?” and the like.
Rachel hates the word “undies” – I can’t say I care for it either, but “panties” annoys me even more.
Leslie: People who ask, “Where is it at?” Hello-o-o, you don’t need to add a useless preposition to the end of the question. Also – this really bugs me: If I am in a store and I say thank you to the cashier or bagger, and the automatic is, “No problem.” I didn’t THINK I was causing a problem by expecting you to do your job. I was just being polite, and the correct response is “YOU’RE WELCOME.” Also: Road Boulders – people who drive at or below the speed limit in the fast lane, so everyone else has to pass them on the right.
That reminds me that “We’re going to the store. You wanna go with?” bugs the shit out of me. Why not just “You wanna go?” Why you gotta add that “with” on the end? IT’S WASTEFUL. Also, I rarely say “You’re welcome,” it was beaten into me (figuratively speaking) when I worked at McDonald’s as a teenager that you answer “Thank you” with “Thank YOU!”, and it’s kind of a knee-jerk reaction for me. It’s not obnoxious, is it? The bagger at the grocery store always looks a little surprised when I thank her after she’s thanked me.
Cara: Pet peeves: People walking around in the grocery store talking on a cell — not just a brief chat, but long, drawn-out conversations/shouting-matches/etc. Don’t they realize EVERYONE can hear what they are saying? Sigh.
God yes, and the people who talk on their cell phone while they’re checking out. And they don’t END the call or say “Let me call you back,” they just keep talking because they are just THAT important. I can’t count how many times I’ve been in line behind someone holding a Very Important Conversation and rolled my eyes at the poor cashier.
Michelle: You can also add these games for my twitch factor: “I know I heard a cat barfing somewhere, now WHERE IS IT?” and “Stop it stop it STOP IT with the growling and hissing and chasing I’M TRYING TO SLEEP!”
What’s worse than knowing there’s cat barf in the house and not being able to find it is NOT knowing it’s there, and stepping in it. Gah.
Val: It’s “Good, Good, Good” that makes me twitch. A former boss said it all the time. He wasn’t a good boss. I can take Good, Good, but throw that 3rd good in the mix and my skin crawls and my ears bleed.
I say “Good, good, good,” but only when I am extremely super over-the-top pissed off. Imagine that the last “good” is bellowed at the top of my lungs.
Aimee: Everyone’s twitchy grammar stuff reminds me of what the girl at mcdonald’s said to me yesterday. “here goes your coke.”
Were you tempted to say “Where’s it going? Can I go too?” Hee.
Elaine: Ah man, I am with Devil on the “could care less” twitch. I run through the difference in my mind EVERY time I hear someone say it. Must be my little OCD issue. I cannot stand constant motion. Why for the love of God is it impossible for some people to be still, if only for a minute or two? I hate that only women are shown singing to their toilets on television. I am sure there are men out there that burst into song everytime they get to stick their scrubby paws into the toilet. Supposebly. ARRRGGGHHHH. I hate corporate speak. Some ahole is always going to Tee Up some Low Hanging Fruit for a Shot on Goal while we get Granular and Organic on some project. Help me Obi Wan.
“Supposably” reminds me of the episode of Friends when Chandler said something about idiots who use the word, and then after he left the room, Joey repeats it to himself a few times, and then nods like he knows it’s the right word. I sure do miss Friends. ::sigh::
Leanne: Anyone who uses the term “ax” as in, “I axed you a question”. !? Add to that “fustrated” and “subbosably”. I swear I am THIS CLOSE to murdering stupid people when they insist on talking like IDIOTS.
My friend Liz cracks me up because she (jokingly) likes to say “If you don’t know, you better AX SOMEONE!”
Also Leanne: As well, as a basement dweller, my issue is with people who live in upstairs apartments who have no consideration for the people below them.
When I was pregnant with the spud, my ex-husband and I lived in a basement apartment, and the woman who lived upstairs got up every morning at 5:00, and she apparently IMMEDIATELY put her heels on, and she walked back and forth. And back and forth. And back and forth. One morning I counted how many times she stomped back and forth, and it was about 40 trips back and forth across the kitchen – which was directly above our bedroom.
To my surprise, no one brought up the usage of quotation marks when they’re not called for – such as the recent sign I saw that proclaimed We don’t take “checks.”
There were lots of good comments yesterday, those are just a few of them. Y’all ought to check them out if you’re not in the habit of reading them regularly!
Thanks, you guys, for your hand lotion suggestions. I’ve written them down, and I will start working my way down the list ’til I find something that works for me. If I’m lucky, the first thing I try will work. A girl can dream, right?
So, I got plenty done yesterday, despite the fact that it was too freakin’ cold outside and I didn’t want to do anything but go back to bed. I did lots of cleaning, plenty of laundry, and I even cleaned a window or two. I’m not going to go overboard* cleaning, because the house is really in pretty good shape, just needs dusting and decluttering. I moved a bunch of stuff around in the front room, and I think the side of the front room we never use looks a lot better.
I think we ought to put up a wall to divide off the unused portion of the front room and turn it into another cat room or a sitting room or something. It’s going to waste the way it is right now, but I’m at a loss what else to do over there. We spend the majority of our day in the computer room, and just a couple of hours in the evening in the front room – there’s that whole unused space over there. It’s a CRYING SHAME, is what it is.
One thing I never did do yesterday is take my jeans off the clothesline. They’ve been there drying for three days now. I wonder if the neighbors shake their heads at how long I leave stuff on the line sometimes. I bought a tote bag at the Hard Rock Cafe back at Christmas time, and I think it’s made out of recycled material (or mostly recycled material). I don’t know what the problem is, but that bag fucking REEKS. I ran it through the washer twice and have let it hang on the line for three and a half months, and it still stinks.
It’s like Nance’s Purse o’ Stank, now that I think of it! I’m such a freakin’ copycat. I’m sure that next I’ll get myself a MacBook.
Maybe I’ll just turn the damn bag into a clothespin bag and let it live out on the line. Except then would it transfer The Stank to the clothespins and ultimately to the clothes the clothespins are holding on the line? I guess we’ll see.
*Remind me I said that when I’m frantically scrubbing under the bed in the guest bedroom and alphabetizing my lotions Thursday morning, would you?
Ezra can’t quite seem to get over the lip of the kitty condo…
“Ezra, give me your paws! I’ll help pull you up!”
“It sure is a long way down…”
Jasper: “Can’t… pull… you… up. You’re too heavy! Caleb! Get something soft for Ezra to land on!”
Ezra: “I have so much to live for! I’m so young! I haven’t even had my snack today! I don’t want to die!”
Caleb: “I likes to chew on this rope.”
“Hold on, brother! I won’t let go of you!”
Jasper: “Can’t… hold… on! My grasp is slipping!”
Ezra: “TELL MOM I LOVE HER IF YOU EVER SEE HER AGAIN! TELL HER I MADE SOMETHING OF MYSELF! TELL HER I WAS A CONTENDUH!”
Jasper: “Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!”
Ezra: “Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!”
Caleb: “This is just some tasty, tasty rope. I wonder if it’s some of that special Italian rope?”
Ezra: “Huh.”
Jasper: “He’s alive! He’s ALIVE! IT’S A MIRACLE!”
During the time before we let the fosters out into the house, we need a way to stop them from getting away when we open the door to the room where they are. We were using a box, but it was flimsy. I tried to get Fred to build something for me, but before he got around to it, I saw the fireplace screen and a lightbulb went on over my head. It’s the right size, the kittens can’t push it over, and they don’t really try to climb it. It’s perfect!
You’ll note that they’re all trying to get Tommy’s attention, but he cannot be bothered to give them the time of day.
Previously
2008: Detective Boogerton, the grizzled, cranky veteran detective who has seen it all, is disgruntled that his day off has been interrupted.
2007: No entry.
2006: FYI.
2005: Meme.
2004: Lime green would work.
2003: I called Fred at one point and said “Maybe it’s SARS!”
2002: Well, you can just bite my coconut-scented, soft, smooth, butt.
2001: No entry.
2000: No entry.
“You mean the panties your mother laid out for you?” When you mentioned panties, I thought of an episode of Seinfeld. Sorry.
I love those kittens!
I was first!
That last picture with all those kitten butts looking at Tommy is precious!
A day late and a dollar short, but I really HATE when people feel the need to use an apostrophe for plurals. I’ve been noticing it more and more lately. I actually have a cousin who is VERY stupid and named her child Lar’s. WITH AN APOSTROPHE!!! GAH!!!!!
OMG, that last picture really shows how tiny Beulah is!
Funny story – great shot of Ezra in mid-fall.
What a heartless Tommy to ignore such cute little faces!
ARGH! I HATE the term panties-it just sends shivers down my spine and makes me think of an old, nasty pedophile lusting after young children. A co-worker once found out I hate this word, and spent the better part of a week using it in almost every sentence.
Because I am a repository of useless information, I recall reading somewhere that “panties” was high on the list of irritating words. Also high on the list was “moist”. I guess “moist panties” would send the greater part of the population over the edge…heh.
Maybe I read it in the comments on bitchypoo…
I have so many grammar pet peeves, I’m almost always in a constant state of twitching. I rarely send texts or IMs anymore, but I always use complete sentences and punctuation!
How about this for a non-grammar twitch: The ad campaign for Always. “Have a happy period!” NO, NO, NO! Even when I am not PMSing, those commercials will make me twitch for a good five minutes. I’d like to find the clown who came up with that ad campaign and string him/her up by their toenails.
Oh, YES, what ChristineQ said about apostrophes for plurals. I HAAAAAAAAAAAATE that!! There’s a local plumbing company that has “Acme Plumbing Supply’s” painted in huge letters on the side of their brick building. If they were the last plumbing company in town, and every one of my pipes burst, I STILL wouldn’t give them my business just for that stupid misplaced apostrophe.
Um, moving on…
These kitty pics make me want to get in my car right now and drive to Alabama (from California) to adopt all seven little bitty kitties. Of course, I’d have a divorce on my hands. But I’d have seven kitties to console me!
Divider line wars make me smile 🙂
Hahahah.. I love Beulah in the back. “Let me see! Let me see! I wanna see!”
oh my god, jean couldn’t have said it better. I hate MOIST. HATE. Also, snack. a moist snack? EVEN WORSE!!
And that kitty story was too cute. Glad he survived that great fall!
Diane, I hope you’re close to Chicago. The ad campaign was designed by Leo Burnett Agency.
Heeeeeeheehee, at Tommy. “La la la, there are no kittens behind me, I do not hear you.”
That last picture is adorable. Little kitten butts!
Ah,I hate the word panties also. For some reason it sounds like we are simpletons. And about 5 years old.
Wonderful picture story. The falling picture is great. No blurs or nuthin’.
Tommy is hysterical.
Jean ~ nope, but my employer is based out of Chicago. Maybe I can get one of my cohorts to do my dirty work.
Another suggestion for your dry hands…unless your hands are actually dirty don’t wash them use hand sanitizer. Yes I know they are alcohol based but we have one where I work (I’m a nurse) and it is so easy on the skin! I have eczema and my hands are a mess if I wash them too much because I can’t use regular lotion I need a prescription cream to get the inflammation under control. So like if you are washing your hands after going to the bathroom or something where you are just making sure you are killing any germs (as opposed to having dirt on your hands from gardening for example) you can use hand sanitizer. You’ll have to find one that has got some moisturizing ingredients in it, I have seen sites where you can even make your own. The infection control people at our hospital say we can use the hand sanitizer 10 times before we have to wash our hands with soap and water. No one keeps count of course and I wash my hands tons with soap and water but using the hand sanitizer helps the dryness of my hands.
I’m a day late too, but change it up and uptight really annoy me.
I once bought cloth holiday napkins that had a disgusting odor. After many washings and never using them I finally gave up and threw them out.
Christine Q-Lar’s-thank you that was the best laugh I’ve had in a while.
Robyn answering “Thank YOU” would just make me think you were very polite-not a bad thing. At the car dealership where my husband works they are extremely focused on giving excellent customer service. When a customer thanks anyone they are instructed to reply, “My pleasure.” I think it sounds very classy-much better than that stupid no problem thing.
Went to the drs. today and remembered a big twitch-people who bitch about the wait the entire time. It doesn’t make it go any faster and I want to shout “Shut up I’m trying to read damn it”. More quiet readers would make the world a better place.
Lastly it would be nice if the pharmacy told me they only had three of my thirty pills instead of letting me find out at home. Now I get to go back again tomorrow or Friday-what fun. P.S. Googled a lot about dog fights/agression yesterday. It seems rescue dogs are like foster kids they take a while to show their true selves. Working on firmly being the alpha and seperating them for meal/snack times. It’s helping so far.
If I taught English and someone handed me in an essay with text-speak, I would put U FAIL LOL at the top, followed by, NO SRSLY; NO A 4 U, and KTXBAI!
You must keep Beulah. She is too cute. I want to squish her with love.
Dom: I think I am going to have to do that now. They already get points off for every text abbreviation that I see. I was also considering shaming them into not doing it by announcing it as I hand essays back.
The kitty butts are going to make my head explode with the cuteness.
Oh, and I’d like to add “munch” to the list of hated words.
Since you asked, when people use the pronouns I, she, or he after a preposition or as the object of a verb it makes my ears hurt. People usually make this mistake when the object of the preposition or verb is plural. Examples: My mother gave presents to he and I. The farmer dickered over the price of eggs with George and I. ARrrrrrrrggggg!
Ask yourself, if the object were singular, would you use the word I by itself? My mother gave a present to he. The farmer dickered over the price of eggs with I. NO!
As far an annoying words are concerned, “squat” ranks right up there!
I’m with on you on the missing Friends thing. God, that show was just awesome!! I still quote the show all the time. The other night during my bowling league, one girl on the team bowled about 4 frames in a row in which she got 7 pins on the first ball. Knowing she was a fellow Friends Fanatic I quoted the line “SEVEN!! SEVEN!! SEVEN!!” from the ep where Monica was teaching Chandler about the erogenous zones on a woman. We cracked up and kept saying it all night long.
Leonore, I feel your pain with the text speak in essays. I always mark off those mistakes and then talk about them to the whole class. I find that it is only the first essay that has those errors. I don’t even need to call anyone out by name. Although, I am going to joyfully use Dom’s suggestion if I have any repeat offenders.
Golly, I’m so glad I’m not the only one who cringes at the P word. Everyone’s (wait, is the apostrophe in the right place?) comments reminded me of the Country Doctor’s Wife’s (oh, jeeze, more apostrophe doubt!) entry http://countrydoctorswife.blogspot.com/2007/12/people-who-say-panties-alot.html
Funny enough read that I can forgive her the “alot.” (Oh, man, should alot be in quotes? Where does the period go?)
Two things. First, I think you should keep Beulah, she is just too small and you and Fred are the only ones that will take excellent care of her. (At least that sounds like a good excuse. Doesn’t it?) Second, did you watch RHoNY and then a sneak peek at RHoNJ? Man, I would just like to smack Kelly!!!! She is on something, no one can act that weird/goofy/strange. And do you think she has rosacea, or her own tanning bed? My husband hates the RH shows, but I cannot turn them off. Is there something wrong with me?