I’m glad you guys are enjoying Dumbversation – Nance has more to post in the future (we were up late that night!), and we’ve come up with a way to continue it even though we live so far apart.
You’ll note that 9/10ths of the time, Nance is the one being funny and outrageous, and I’m just sitting there reacting to her. I’m totally her Ed McMahon.
And yes, I’ll add a link in the sidebar one day soon so y’all will be reminded that it exists!
Oh, and I should add here that though I said my mother and I didn’t talk about sex, she did try to bring it up several times when I was a kid, whereupon I maturely screamed “GROSS!” and ran away.
I went to Sam’s Club yesterday, y’all, and I will be goddamned if I didn’t ONCE AGAIN leave that place having spent LESS than $100! I honestly never thought it was possible, and now I’ve done it three times in a row.
I deserve a Nobel peace prize or something.
It helps that I’ve been sticking to the list (well, except for the rawhide treats I got for the dogs. PRIORITIES, people!) and the good thing about Sam’s is that I can go there starving to death, but I’ll never buy snack food. While I MIGHT buy a single candy bar or donut or something at the grocery store if I’m really hungry, at Sam’s if you want a candy bar you have to buy like 300 of them, and well – that ain’t gonna happen.
My favorite part of shopping at Sam’s is that I have my membership through Fred’s company, thus I have a “business membership” and so I can go into the store between 7 and 10 (as well as during regular hours), before the unwashed public is allowed in. It’s a lot less busy before 10, as you can imagine, and I can go in, sail through there, load up my cart, and get out in about twenty minutes.
It’s surprising how many people don’t realize that they don’t have the super-special business membership – at least three people were turned away when I was going through the door at 9:00, and they were completely surprised that they weren’t allowed in.
After Sam’s, I went to Michael’s to look at picture frames and debate on what kind of crafty supplies I thought I should buy. I don’t know what the hell it is about that store, but I come up with these brilliant ideas while I’m in the store, and then I get home and think “Now, what was I going to do with this calligraphy pen, double-sided tape, basket, and pinking shears, again?”
I went over to Target, which was jam-packed with mothers and kids buying stuff for school, which I believe is going to be starting again soon. I poked around the store, looked for things on my list, loaded up my cart, checked out, and then headed for home.
I made a quick stop at Kohl’s and ended up buying frames there. I’d looked at frames at Michael’s, but they were so expensive and not what I wanted, that I hadn’t bought any there. The frames at Kohl’s were on sale (which, don’t get your panties in a bunch, everything’s always on sale at Kohl’s, it’s just everything starts out at three times the normal price you could find for the same item in any other store, then when they mark it 50% off, you feel like you’re getting a SUPER bargain. I’m wise to your ways, Kohl’s, yet helpless to resist your 50% off!!!! signs.), so I bought several of them.
THEN I headed home. I was about ten minutes from home when I had to call Fred and bitch to him about the fact that I’d just heard a McDonald’s commercial for their new 1/3-lb Angus burger (or whatever it’s called), and they used the phrase “vice versa”, only they didn’t use the phrase “vice versa.” They used the phrase “vice-a versa”, which is NOT A PHRASE AND DOES NOT EXIST AND YOU WOULD THINK ONE OF THE FUCKBRAINS AT THE ADVERTISING COMPANY WOULD HAVE CAUGHT THAT ONE GAH I AM GOING TO BOYCOTT MCDONALDS UNTIL SUCH A TIME THAT I AM IN DESPERATE NEED OF AN EGG MCMUFFIN GODDAMNIT.
By the time I got home, it was almost 1:00, so I went out and checked on the turkeys (Fred was concerned that they’d have all died for no reason in the 4 hours since I left to go do my errands). The turkeys ran over to the fence and looked expectantly at me. I tossed them a handful of scratch, and in unison they looked at the scratch and then looked at me expectantly again. I tossed them a handful of cat food (since we don’t leave a full bowl of cat food on the front porch anymore, we have leftover cheap cat food that I don’t feed our cats, and it’s a good source of protein for the birds) and they looked at the cat food and then turned again to me, looking expectant.
I don’t know what they were expecting, but it wasn’t scratch or cat food, I can tell you that.
I spent a good part of the afternoon going through old foster kitty pics, choosing ones to print out so that I can hang them on the wall in the foster kitten room. It was surprising to me that there were actually some fosters I didn’t remember very well, but they were mostly the ones who came and went in a matter of days.
I had a really hard time choosing pictures of Kara and her kittens because I took over 1,400 of them, for god’s sake. But I narrowed down the total pictures printed out to 99 (in addition to the 20 or so I ordered and got last week), and when they arrive next week, I’ll get to work taping them to the big-ass canvas I bought at Michael’s today for just that purpose.
I also sent off some pictures of Mister Boogers, Spot, Tubby and Fancypants to be printed (I use Shutterfly). I bought a picture frame that will hold two pictures of each of them, and I think it’ll look nice once all the pictures are in the frame and it’s hung on the wall. Our own little memorial.
Poor Suggie. We’ve come to realize that using the Bite Not collar on him doesn’t work because he’s a smart little fucker and he’s figured out that if he streeeeetches his leg just so, he can reach it, and still lick his toes raw. This has been going on for far too fucking long, so we dug out the victorian collar yesterday afternoon and put it on him, and he went from his usual super-happy ass-on-fire self to super-depressed and sad and “Why you hate me???”
If we can just get his toes to heal up, we can take the fucking collar off him, and he can go back to being the happy Sugs we know and love so much.
Previously
2008: This is MY SITE.
2007: No entry.
2006: I reflected for a moment that I wasn’t hovering over him in the dead of night, so I didn’t know how I could have possibly scared him.
2005: See that? I made a thinly veiled joke about his age! I am SO FUNNY!
2004: As for where the odd socks go – the bad ones go to hell, don’t they?
2003: Oui, I am back! Let the rejoicing begin!
2002: No entry.
2001: No entry.
2000: So we were at the beach this morning by 10.