* * * Yesterday, on the way home from the pet store, I stopped at the grocery store to pick up a few things, and I happened across a rack of gift cards, and as I stood and looked, I realized that there were a bunch of gift cards from the places I’d intended to order them online (is that a convoluted sentence? You know what I mean!), and so I ended up buying a bunch of gift cards at the grocery store. The cashier apparently highly disapproved of something – I don’t know whether it was the fact that I was purchasing so many gift cards, or that I’d brought my own bag, or that I turned down the bagboy’s (bagman? Can you call a 60-something a “boy”?) offer to carry the bag out to my car (I said “No, that’s fine. I can get it.” and he said “But it’s heavy!” and I smiled and said “I COULD BENCH PRESS YOU OLD MAN, NOW UNHAND THE BAG!” or maybe “No, really. I’m stronger than I look!”, I don’t remember which.) or the fact that I was chomping on gum like it was my job* or – my secret fear – maybe she’s happened across my site and knows that I throw “fuck”s and “goddamn”s around like confetti, so she was waiting for me to bellow “GODDAMN, OLD MAN, GIVE ME THAT MOTHERFUCKING BAG AND GET YOUR ASS OUT OF MY MOTHERFUCKING WAY! MOTHERFUCK!”. I don’t know what her issue was, but she had the “I disapprove” vibes coming through loud and clear. Obviously it makes no difference in my life whether a random cashier at the grocery store disapproves of me, but I am curious. I wonder what the fuck her issue was? In any case, woohoo! After a trip to the grocery store and some quality time with my computer last night, I am 99% done with my Christmas shopping for my side of the family, and just have to wait to hear what to buy for Fred’s family. Woot! *Oprah hates gum-chewing, did you know that? It grosses her out or something. Shut up, Oprah. JESUS. I can’t stand the way your audience howls and claps and hoots and hollers and somehow that doesn’t get edited out, but I still watch, don’t I? Seriously. I couldn’t even stand to watch the Favorite Things show because of all the screaming. I suspect that if you told them to hold the hooting and howling and screaming until the end of the show, they would, OPRAH.
The look on Elle’s face is cracking me UP.
“It is time for the pettin’.”
Elle is just the happiest cat. She rolls around and purrs and if you don’t come and pet her, she’ll come to you and demand petting.
Punki has claimed Sugarbutt’s basket as her own. You can just imagine how THAT went over!
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Sweet sleepin’ Stinkerbelle.