Jane? Somehow, I think not.), but they aren’t where you necessarily want to spend half an hour of your life, standing over the toilet and gagging up processed meat.
Though once I barfed up a few pieces of meat, my stomach settled down and I felt better, if a tad weak. See, I’d opted to bring the laptop to Maine with me, and somehow walking all over hell and creation with my travel purse stuffed full of my contacts case, my glasses, all my medication, three books (better to have too many than not enough, I always say), all the usual assorted bullshit, AND two 1-liter bottles of water, combined with the sheer ungodly weight of the laptop case hanging off my opposite shoulder was enough to make it so that my legs weren’t willing to do much more than they had to. And when I had to go up a flight of stairs, my fucking right leg almost went out from underneath me, but with my lightning-quick reflexes ( :snort: ) I grabbed onto the railing and forced myself to stay upright.
Anyway.
So I was sitting in the airport, trying to figure out how to use the laptop, since there were signs everywhere saying that the entire airport was a hotspot (hot spot? I don’t know whether it’s one word or not.) and people everywhere were using their laptops. Only, I couldn’t connect to Google or anything, so I gave up without much of a fight and sat there looking around me enviously at the people with the much smaller laptops who didn’t have to deal with sore shoulders for three days after lugging the goddamn thing through the airport LIKE I DID. Then they announced over the loudspeaker that the flight was oversold and they were looking for someone to give up their seat and take a flight the next morning. Giving up your seat would net you a $300 flight voucher, good for a flight anywhere in the continental US, a voucher for a hotel room, and meal vouchers.
Why the holy fucking hell I didn’t jump on that, I have no fucking clue. I waffled about it each time they made the announcement, and I thought about calling Debbie (who was going to be picking me up at the airport at 11 pm) and asking her opinion, and then I waffled so long that other people gave up their seats.
I vowed, however, that if they oversold on my flight home, I’d give up my seat without a second thought.
The flight from Cincinnati left on time and I was happy because (1) Losing 115 pounds means you have more room in your seat AND you don’t need seatbelt extenders (2) I was in a single seat by myself (the plane being small, there were two seats on the left side and one seat on the right). I was unhappy because (1) My seat was the last row in the plane, which meant that I was directly in front of the bathroom, and (2) GODDAMN those airline toilets can stink to high heaven.
Anyway, we took off from Cincinnati, and I took several thousand pictures of the sunset, because I always carry my camera with me when I’m flying. I know there are people who prefer to pack their cameras, because I’ve SEEN their cameras at the Unclaimed Baggage store. Why anyone would pack any kind of electronic equipment – laptop, camera, iPod – instead of carrying it with them, I don’t for one second understand.
The flight was pretty uneventful, except for the fact that I got freezing cold about halfway through the flight, put on my jacket (see? I’m no dummy. I knew I was going to get cold!), and immediately the flight attendant turned on the heat and I started sweltering.
(But I wasn’t complaining, because one of the many oddities of having lost weight is that I would 63 times rather be hot than cold.)
We landed in Portland on time – if not a little early – and I was pretty much the last one off the plane. I called to let Fred know I’d arrived, and then headed off the plane and across the concrete toward the set of stairs leading to my gate.
And the goddamn camera fell out of my purse and landed on the concrete, and the fucking thing shattered like you wouldn’t believe.
I immediately called Fred and said “You. Are. Going. To. KILL ME.” but he remained really pretty calm, and we discussed how I could look for a camera at Best Buy or Staples the next day, but use my father’s camera (he has the exact same model we have) until then.
I got my luggage as it came off the carousel (and how impressed am I that Portland now has THREE luggage carousels? SO VERY impressed, I am.), and was just headed toward the door to bring my luggage outside and call Debbie (we’d agreed I’d just call her when I had my luggage) when I said “Huh. That kid looks just like Brian, only Brian isn’t THAT tall!”, and then I realized that it was, in fact, Brian and he was looking around, talking on his cell phone, and looking puzzled. He finally saw me grinning like a buffoon at him and did a double-take.
“Who are you and what have you done with my Aunt?” he said, as I gave him a hug.
Debbie was out in the short-term parking lot where someone has to stay with the car, and after I gave her a hug, we loaded my luggage in the car (did I mention that I brought two bags with me so I wouldn’t have to mail a big box o’ stuff home? HA.) and headed for Lisbon Falls, but not before stopping at a Big Apple (similar to a 7-11, for those of you not in the area where they have Big Apples) to try to find something I could eat. I ended up buying a Slim Jim-type meat stick and cheese stick, took two bites, and tossed the rest.
We got to my parents’ house pretty late. My father was still up, but my mother had gone to bed. We talked for a few minutes, and then I popped out my contacts, brushed my teeth, and went to bed.
For once, I didn’t sleep very well in my parents’ basement. It’s so dark and quiet down there that I usually sleep like a rock, but I tossed and turned for most of the night, finally giving up and getting up around 7 or so the next morning.
(When I was 17, I actually worked down near 5 Islands. On Malden Island, to be exact. If you go here and look at that picture, the island you see off to the right is Malden Island. Or if you go look at this picture, that gray building in the distant background was the kitchen/ dining room building for Malden Island; Malden Island itself is to the left.)
Friday, I don’t really remember what we did. I think we went shopping to various places – maybe in the Brunswick area; that might be the day we hit some stores in the Cook’s Corner region. I got some pants and a shirt at Fashion Bug, a metric ton of bath crap at TJ Maxx, and a bunch of extremely cheap t-shirts (among other things) at Wal-Mart. We had lunch at Applebee’s, then headed home for a little while before we got ready to go to the movies. Liz met us at the theater, and Debbie’s friend joined us as well, so it was quite a little crowd of us.
(Liz hugged me when I saw her at the theater then called me a bitch because I now weigh less than her. Heh!)
We saw The Devil Wears Prada Friday night, and I really liked it. I have to say, Meryl Streep looked FABULOUS and she did a really good job in that role. Ann Hathaway is just about the cutest thing around, and I really liked her in that role, and it was a bonus to see Vince from Entourage, and Franco from Rescue Me.
After the movie we stood out in front of the movie theater for 15 or 20 minutes, just talking. My mother finally headed home, and I got a ride from Liz, who had to go through Lisbon Falls to get home in Lewiston, so we stopped at Debbie’s to get her car, and then she dropped me off at home.
Debbie’s cats – Punki (the dilute calico) and Tigger (the orange cutie).
(Eagle Island, former summer home of Admiral Robert E. Peary; currently maintained as a state park.)
(Little Mark Island Monument; constructed in 1827 as a memorial to shipwrecked sailors. Food and water once stored in the base to assist marooned seamen.)
So once the cruise was over, we went over to Cook’s Restaurant to have lunch, because we were both hungry. Cook’s is a seafood place and we talked about getting lobster, but I wasn’t in the mood to take a lobster apart, so I ended up ordering the lobster casserole, which was lobster, surprisingly enough, in a casserole. Basically, it was covered with sauce and 63 pounds of bread crumbs. I got that and the house salad, and a side of coleslaw, and while the salad was good and the coleslaw wasn’t bad, the lobster casserole wasn’t all that. Once I got the breadcrumbs pushed off, the sauce the lobster was in was good, but the lobster itself was overcooked.
At least the tea was really good, I’ll say that.
We left Cook’s to head toward the strip mall where my mother gets her manicures and pedicures, but about halfway there, the salad I’d eaten with lunch was starting to go through me, so we decided to go for the mani/ pedi later in the week, and just went home.
Debbie and Brian were at the house when we got there, and we sat downstairs and talked (and I surfed online a little from my laptop, still trying to get it to hook up with my father’s wireless network, which just really wasn’t working, and I couldn’t figure out WHY). Debbie and I were supposed to meet up with Liz – we were going to see Click.
“There’s nothing I want to do less than go see this movie tonight,” Debbie said.
“I’m with you,” I said. “Let’s go get dinner!”
We ended up going to Be@le Str33t BBQ in Bath (when I told Fred where we’d gone later, he said “Stop right there. There’s no such thing as Memphis Barbeque in MAINE.” Heh.), and the place was hoppin’ but the food… not so much. I was unimpressed; I think we all were, really.
We went back to Debbie’s and hung out for a little while, then Liz and I left, and Liz dropped me off at my parents’ on the way through Lisbon Falls.
More tomorrow!
All of today’s uploaded pictures are hither.
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8/7/06