Month: February 2006

* * * Currently reading: The Undomestic Goddess, by Sophie Kinsella. I really do like Kinsella’s books. The Shopaholic series started to seem very much the same after a while, but I still enjoyed them. Good chick lit, and I need something kind of lighthearted to cheer me up after reading… Finished last night: Night, by Elie Wiesel. And y’all shut up and don’t tell me Oprah’s leading me around by the nose. She is NOT, I just looked at the description after she announced it on her book club, and I thought I should read it. It’s such a sad heartbreaker of a book; I recommend it. Also recently finished: Killing Yourself to Live, by Chuck Klosterman. Pretty good book, actually. Another one I wasn’t particularly looking forward to, but ended up enjoying it despite myself.

* * * So, I don’t think I mentioned that Saturday morning Fred asked if I wanted to take a trip to the flea market and wander around for a while. I was up for it, so we got ready and went. We ended up with socks for Fred, a toy for the cats (but of course!), a book for both of us, and a Figure Skating National Championship tape for me (one dollah!). Altogether we spent less than ten dollars and came away with something for everyone. Well, except for the spud, who was at home, still sleeping. That’s the beauty of when kids get older, you know. You can go out and do stuff while they’re still home sleeping UNTIL NOON, and not have to worry about them, because if there’s a problem they’ll call on your cell phone. And to think that I can still remember the day when she couldn’t pour her own cereal… (This is where Fred would make a joke about how that was just last week) Fred dropped me off at home and then went back out to the movie store to see what he could find for us to watch that night. When he came home, he had not only some movies, but also a balloon from the grocery store near the movie store. See, Fred’s mother and stepfather sent me flowers and balloons the day I came home from surgery, and there was this one mylar balloon that was just – almost two weeks after I got it – starting to die. Tommy likes to play with the balloon – well, to be specific, he likes to grab the ribbon and run around with the balloon trailing behind him. The ribbon on the balloon Fred had purchased at the grocery store was pretty long, and since we didn’t want to worry about the cats getting ahold of it when we weren’t around (because I think we all know that we’d end up with Tommy running around with the balloon sticking out of one end of him, and a ribbon sticking out the other) Fred snipped it. And then he tied a loop into the end of the ribbon, because Tommy sometimes has trouble getting ahold of the ribbon (do you see how we bend over backwards to make sure our cats never ever have to suffer one moment of frustration?), and the loop seemed to be a big hit. Tommy grabbed it and ran around with it in his mouth for the longest time. And then Fred thought it would be funny to put the loop around Mister Boogers’ neck to see what he’d do. Mister Boogers chewed at the ribbon a little, and then batted at the balloon, and then figured out how to slip the loop from around his neck, and the cats sat and watched as the balloon floated to the ceiling. THEN, Fred had a Very Good Idea. He put the loop around Sugarbutt’s neck. Sugarbutt started to walk away, and the balloon followed him, and Sugarbutt stopped and shot the balloon a dirty look as if to say “I see you following me. Is there something I can do for you?” The balloon bobbed gently about, and Sugarbutt walked away again, and again the balloon followed. Sugarbutt stopped again, and again another dirty look. “Stop following me,” Sugarbutt said. “Or I shall call the gendarmes and they shall kick your ass all the way back to Paree.” The balloon bobbed gently. Sugarbutt sat down and began busily licking his nether regions, perhaps hoping that the balloon would get bored and go away. He finished his grooming routine and began chewing on the ribbon hanging off the balloon, as if to demonstrate that the balloon’s presence did not disturb him. When he was sure that the balloon had gotten the message, he stood up and began walking toward the window. The balloon followed. And Sugarbutt lost his shit. He ran in circles around the dining room. He ran from the dining room to the computer room, to the dining room again. The entire time his ears were flat back on his head, and his eyes were wide and dark. I wanted to catch him to help him, but he was moving so fast – and I was so weak from laughter – that I couldn’t do a thing. Finally, he ran upstairs, and Fred ran after him while I sat in the computer room and laughed until I cried. Fred came back downstairs about ten minutes later, the balloon in his hand, the ribbon on the balloon frayed at the end. “Did he chew that off?” I asked, impressed. “No, I think it got caught on something and tore. I found it under our bed, and Sugarbutt’s under the spud’s bed with the loop still around his neck, and he won’t come near me.” Poor Sugarbutt. I immediately felt bad for laughing at him… until I remembered the wild look on his face, and started laughing again. Sugarbutt ended up hiding under the spud’s bed for a good hour or so before Fred could convince him to come out and have the ribbon removed from around his neck. And when he did venture downstairs, any time there was the slightest unexpected noise he’d shoot behind the couch and hide. At one point he climbed up into the couch and couldn’t get back out again, requiring a rescue from Fred and the spud. Mid-afternoon, the spud cleaned her room (!), and when she came downstairs with a couple of trash bags full of trash and stuff she wanted to get rid of, Sugarbutt heard the sound of the trash bags rattling, and I’m sure he thought it was a gang of balloons, out to kick his ass, and he ran behind the couch and hid for a few hours. I was concerned that he’d be a skittish kitten for the rest of his life and that we’d ruined him, but as of yesterday afternoon, he was back to his old self. Thank god, ’cause I sure do like his old self! Brudderly love. Sugarbutt figured out how to get on top of the refrigerator, and now it’s his favorite place to hang out. Snack time! Spanky’s such a pretty boy. Lookin’ guilty. All of today’s uploaded pictures (including the ones above) are here. * * * Previously 2005: “I wasn’t worried,” Fred said to me. “Because any party where the invitation suggests bringing Dance Dance Revolution pads is not one that’s going to get out of hand.” 2004: No entry. 2003: No entry. 2002: Be our valentine, bitch! 2001: Could this get any more exciting, talking about the weather? 2000: Is it wrong that hearing about that incident gives me a whole new respect for Maria?]]>

Hi Robyn- I know you don’t do this very often – but can you help me find someone who taped the “Top Superbowl Commercials” that played on Saturday night before Superbowl? We forgot to tape it as we had a BB game we had to go to (my daughters). I have not heard the end of it……still! My husband is a whining and with his birthday coming up in March – I thought I could shut him up if I could find someone who had taped it. I am willing to pay for the tape and postage plus a little extra for thier time up front). If anyone can help out, please email me or leave a comment, would you? Thanks!

* * * Readers, I know you’ll be able to tell me this: how do you pronounce the name “Sia”? I can’t imagine how on earth it’s pronounced, and it’s driving me nuts! * * * I walked into the bathroom the other morning, and glanced into the tub on my way to the toilet. And then I stopped and thought “What on god’s green earth is all over the inside of the tub?” And I peered closer and thought about it, and I thought “Huh. It kind of looks like sawdust. What the hell?” I couldn’t think of why sawdust would be all over the inside of the tub, and I pondered it while I was on the toilet, and pondered it some more while I washed my hands and put it in my contacts and then I peered closer with my contact-ed eyes, and still couldn’t figure it out. So I was going to call Fred and ask him what the hell it was, but the instant I walked from the bathroom to the bedroom, I completely forgot about it, and went to get dressed and came downstairs to exercise and eat breakfast and all that. The next time I saw the tub was a few hours later when I walked through the bathroom… on my way to the toilet (WHAT? Shut up, I drink three liters a day, so I pee a lot. You just wish your bladder was as overworked as mine.) and I looked at the tub and I thought “This is ridiculous. This will drive me crazy all day (except that I think we all know that I would have forgotten it the second I sashayed back through the door to the bedroom), I MUST FIGURE THIS OUT.” So I peed and washed my hands, and then I stood over the tub, and I pondered. Was it the remains of something the cats had found and killed? Because that Tommy likes to hang out in the tub. But then, he also likes to chase his tail while he’s in the tub, so perhaps he’s not quite together enough to kill a small creature and leave its remains all over the tub. Was Fred doing construction somewhere in the house to surprise me (perhaps a small outside enclosure where we could put the litter boxes, which he is doing an admirable job of keeping clean(ish), but which still can stink up the upstairs like you would not BELIEVE)? Probably not, because (a) he’s not really a construction kinda guy and (b) I would have heard the saws running, since I’m pretty much in the house 24 hours a day. I looked around and Sugarbutt twined back and forth between my ankles, stopping occasionally to lick the top of my (besocked) foot, because the cat will lick ANYTHING. Last night Fred had to tip the couch onto its back to look at something, and Sugarbutt jumped atop the couch and licked furiously at the fabric for no reason I could think of. Finally, I looked up by Fred’s sink, and the light dawned. When Fred takes a bath, he sits in the tub and does Sudoku puzzles. And sometimes he has to erase things, and so he sits in the tub and madly erases. And what was all over the inside of the tub was the eraser leavings he’d brushed off his Sudoku puzzles, and which apparently floated around in the water until he pulled the plug, and which gravitated to the sides and bottom of the tub. Mystery solved. Just call me Nancy Drew. It was a Ivana Milicevic kinda weekend for me. First, Friday, I caught up on the two DVR’d episodes of Love Monkey I hadn’t seen yet, and she’s in that. Then Saturday night Fred and I started to watch Slipstream (we didn’t get that far into it before we turned it off), and she’s a major character in that. Then I watched In Her Shoes, and she plays the mother in that (just in pictures). THEN I watched Just Like Heaven on Sunday, and she was in that, too. It’s been a busy year for her, I’d say. Aside from the above-mentioned movies, I also watched Elizabethtown on Sunday. It wasn’t too bad – though Kirsten Dunst gets on my nerves – but I should point out that the majority of my attention was on what I was cross-stitching rather than on the movie, so maybe that made a difference. Same with Just Like Heaven – I was cross-stitching through it, and it didn’t seem to bad to me. Whether that’s because it really isn’t a bad movie or rather because I wasn’t fully paying attention to it, I’ll let you decide. In Her Shoes was really, really good; I recommend it! * * * Heading outside (but not for long – it was COLD!) “NO, Dad! I don’t WANT the collar! Oh, PLEASE don’t put the collar on me!” Writhing around on the floor in protest of the collar. One second you’re laying on the floor, enjoying your life… And the next, you’re getting your ass kicked by your big brother. All of today’s uploaded pictures are here. ]]>

Okay, I like Madonna. I, personally, thought she was cuter back when she was all Material Girl in the ridiculous clothes, before she became scarily super-toned and in shape and started to take herself too seriously. Also, the faux-British accent gets on my nerves. But anyway, I like her. I think it’s cool that she’d had a career that’s spanned centuries and is still going strong. You go, girl! But. But. Good christ, the leotard.

I cannot STAND the leotard. She’s wearing the freakin’ leotard EVERYWHERE. I imagine the booking agents at the talk shows are having a cow: “Yes, we’d like to book Madonna – okay, okay, MADGE. We’d like to book MADGE on Letterman for the 15th. To sing and interview, that’s correct. She’ll be the first guest. Oh, and please, for the love of all that is holy can she leave the leotard at home? Because she’s worn the fucking thing so many times it’s got to be fraying in the ass. She’s in fabulous shape, WE GET THE IDEA, please. PLEASE. No more leotard!” I don’t know if she’s wearing it with the attitude of “BOO-YAH, bitches! You said I was a has-been ten seconds after Holiday broke, and I am still HERE, and look at my fine ass in this tight overworn leotard, and I have more money than you could count in a million years, so BITE IT!”, or if it’s more “Look, you fat cow on that couch in Alabama, get OFF your ass and do sixteen hours of yoga a day and eat 1 bean – and on the wild days a scoop of protein powder directly into your mouth – and YOU can look like this too! Come on sister, get moving!” Anyway, Madonna’s cool, but I’d like to see the leotard go directly into the trash. Unless maybe it’s a magic leotard and the source of all her powers? Also, the 70s ‘do. I’m not diggin’ it, Madge. * * * A couple of days ago I was flipping through the guide for the WE channel, and came across Secret Lives of Women because I – perhaps you didn’t know this? – am a woman, and if there are lots of women out there having secret lives, perhaps this is something I need to get in on? Do I need a secret life? What kind of secret life do I need? Where would I find said secret life?, I set up to tape a couple of these Secret Lives of Women episodes, specifically the Late in Life Lesbians and Sex Trade episodes. They seemed like a good place to start, you know? (No, I am sad to say, I am not a Late in Life Lesbian. I am not a lesbian, period. I’m not nearly cool enough.) So yesterday I sat down and watched the Late in Life Lesbian episode while I cross-stitched, and it was pretty good. It featured three different women who’d been married and had kids, and came to the realization – usually in their thirties, now that I think about it – that they were gay. They all had partners, and one of the women – Jocelyn – had a partner who was a retired Marine. For the entire show, Jocelyn’s partner’s face was blurred because, you see, if it came out that she was a lesbian, her VA benefits would be at risk. Which pisses me off, really. I mean, I know if it comes out that you’re gay while you’re in the military you can be discharged, but they can TAKE AWAY YOUR BENEFITS, the benefits you’re given because you served your country, if they find out you’re gay. Seriously? That is fucking ridiculous. Anyway, I think they called her “Ellen”, and they always had her in shadow, or if they showed her with Jocelyn and Jocelyn’s daughters, they had her face blurred out. And then at the end, they showed “Ellen” standing in the foreground in her camoflauge uniform with her head down so you couldn’t see her face, and in the background were Jocelyn and her daughters, and then “Ellen” raised her head, and she said “I’m a lesbian,” took her hat off and finished “And I’m not hiding anymore.” Oh, the TEARS, how they FLOWED, because it just got me right there, y’know? I think that Secret Lives of Women might be my brand new addiction. * * * Brudderly love. “What the -? What are you -? NO, don’t TOUCH MY TAIL. I don’t CARE if it looks so soft and fluffy you’ve just gotta touch it! Good god, that’s MY TAIL! Don’t you know that you don’t TOUCH a man’s TAIL without asking first? JESUS!” I was trying to get a picture of how Miz Poo, when she sits on my lap, just HAS to put her paw on my boob, but I ended up with this one instead. She looks all cross-eyed, and I like how you can see her little row o’ teeth. All uploaded pictures for today are here. * * * Previously 2005: “Life’s too fucking short to read books that suck.” 2004: Damn you, DVR! I WANT to love you, but you’re toying with my emotions! 2003: No entry. 2002: No entry. 2001: No entry. 2000: I’m not sure what effect, if any, it had on her.]]>

Currently reading: Killing Yourself to Live, by Chuck Klosterman. Finished late last night: Bitter is the New Black, by Jen Lancaster. I liked it a lot – I laughed out loud several times – and like I said before, I can definitely see it being turned into a movie. Recommended!

* * * So I watched an episode of Oprah yesterday, the one with Faith Hill and Tim McGraw, and I’ve gotta say, they’re a pretty cute couple. Tim must be half monkey, because he kept grooming Faith – once he brushed lint off her pants, and another time he saw a hair on her face and brushed it off. My favorite part was when they were cooking chicken and dumplings in their kitchen, and he was kneading the dough for the dumplings (“dumplins”, I guess I should say. Note for the northerners: dumplins down here are noodle-like rather than the type we’re accustomed to up there) and he said “You have to be careful, because if you knead too much, it’ll get stiff and hard”, and then he had to stop to giggle, and she got mad at him and told him to “Keep it clean.” Giggling like that is EXACTLY something Fred would do. * * * Yeah, can you tell I’m really reaching for topics today? I think today’s another day where I’ll slap up cat pictures and call it an entry. Fred, covered by cats. The funniest part about this picture isn’t the Booger yawning – though that’s a pretty good yawn – but Sugarbutt in the background, looking up at the ceiling. “Bleh. What the hell have I been rolling around in?” “Bob! Damnit! Bring me some ‘nip! I’m going into withdrawal!” “Bitch, you flash that thing at me one more time, I’ma cut you. You get me?” An even better illustration of the lack of hair around Tommy’s mouth. It’s not quite as bare as it looks in the picture, but there’s not a whole lot of hair there. All of today’s uploaded pictures are here. * * * Previously 2005: Taking the day off. 2004: I don’t believe I mentioned that the Bean has tapeworms. 2003: No entry. 2002: No entry. 2001: And I yelled “Any fucking thing else?!”, addressing, I guess, God. 2000: Okay, so I don’t have much to say today.]]>

* * * If you ever give photo albums (with pictures) to someone as a gift, you know what would be a good addition to that gift? A disc with all the pictures that are in the album, in digital form. Isn’t that a good idea? I think I’m going to start putting together a photo album for the spud of all her pictures from when she was a baby to now. If I start now, maybe I’ll have it done by the time she graduates from high school in 2007!

So, they never were able to find anything wrong with my car. I don’t know if it was just some water in the gas line or what, but Fred drove it home yesterday and said it was running just fine. And then he told the spud that at the dealership they’d told him a teenager must be driving the car. Heh. * * * There’s just nothin’ going on ’round these parts. I’m going to put up a bunch of cat pictures and call it an entry. This picture is to illustrate how sparse the hair around Tommy’s mouth is. I’m not sure why that is. Also, every time he flops down, you can always see that one nipple. I don’t know if it’s a particularly prominent nipple or there’s just less hair around it, but it always catches my eye. Miz Poo on my lap. Spot would like you all to just calm down and be quiet, please. He needs a nap. The “purse carry”, as we call it. Sugarbutt and Mister Boogers like to be carried like this. Brudders quarrel. Brudderly love. All of today’s uploaded pictures, here. * * * Previously 2005: I’ll take my anonymous life, thank you. 2004: No entry. 2003: No entry. 2002: “What?” he said. “I WASN’T geeky!” 2001: No entry. 2000: Tomorrow, I’m going to go see Dr. Judy for my ear, out of which I still cannot hear anything but constant white noise. ]]>

reading: Bitter is the New Black, by Jen Lancaster. I’m only about a quarter of the way into it, and it’s hilarious! I’m enjoying it a lot. I can totally see this book being made into a movie. Recently finished: The Twelfth Card, by Jeffery Deaver. I adore Lincoln Rhyme and Amelia Sachs. I have a hard time thinking of Rhyme as a white guy, though, since Denzel Washington played him in The Bone Collector. Anyway, an excellent book, with a lovely surprise at the end.

* * * I had to get up early again this morning to take Fred to work, since my car’s still in the shop. They couldn’t seem to find anything wrong with it yesterday, so they decided to let it sit overnight and see if starting it cold this morning would make the problem show up. For the record, it’s running rough and kind of sluggish. My car’s a pain in the ass sometimes, but I still love the little guy. * * * You know how there are cell phones out now that double as mp3 players? I think that the next thing Apple should create is a cell phone/ iPod player. Because I suspect that the current line of phones/ mp3 players leave a little to be desired – surely the music is tinny and not up to iPod standards – and Apple could capture a whole ‘nother market. Actually, I think a cell phone/ iPod/ word processor in one tiny little package would be cool. You’re about to tell me that they already make those, aren’t you? * * * I watched Singles yesterday, because Netflix sent it to me (uh, because it was in my queue, not because they randomly sent it to me) and I wanted to get it watched and sent back so I could start on the first disc of Veronica Mars, season one. Did you know Cameron Crowe made that movie? I had no idea. Anyway, Kyra Sedgwick is in the movie, and it kept nagging at me that she looked like someone, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it, and then it struck me… Kyra Sedgwick. Corey Feldman. It’s mostly around the eyes that they resemble each other, but I’m telling you – they could totally play brother and sister in a movie. If Corey Feldman wasn’t a self-important has-been asshole, that is.

Someone pointed out when I went in for surgery last week that I was a big tease, because last year I wrote an entry hinting at the fact that I’d made a big decision and was following through on it – it was this entry, and I was doing a meme, and it said What was your biggest achievement of the year? Finally coming to a decision and starting to follow through on it (she said cryptically). and Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2004. Never say never. And then several months later when she wondered what I’d been talking about, I completely acted like I didn’t know what she was talking about. I did know what she was talking about, I just wasn’t ready to reveal The! Big! Secret! Sorry about that, reader; I’m sure you understand! Also, if you look in the comments to that entry, you’ll note that at least one reader guessed weight loss surgery. And that I didn’t respond to that at ALL. What’s funny is that one of the first commenters guessed weight loss surgery and I freaked out and deleted the comment. Heh. I’m a dork. * * * “I… do not know how this happened to me. I jumped up for a belly rub, and suddenly I was in this convoluted position. It’s surprisingly comfortable.” Brudderly love. All of today’s uploaded pictures can be seen here. * * * Previously 2005: Yes, I use the same kind of lotion as my CAT. 2004: No entry. 2003: Anyway. Enough about my underwear. 2002: You’ve been warned, skank hos out there who would swoop down upon my husband in his grief and get him to marry you. 2001: Yeah, that’s me, not giving a shit if they can see me or not… 2000: Really, what other journaller will thrill you with pictures from the litter box?]]>

Someone asked in my comments last week whether I’ll be updating about the whole weight loss surgery just at OneFatBitchypoo, or would I cross-post the entries. I think I’m going to just post them over at OFB, and anyone who wants to read them can go over there. I did a lot of writing over there this weekend, and you can read the three entries I just posted, beginning with my recap of the day of surgery, here, and just hit the “next” links at the bottom of each page. There’ll probably be another entry up tomorrow, and possibly another the day after that as well. If you ever need to get there from here, there’s a link to OneFatBitchypoo in the sidebar.

* * * I’ve been watching a lot of TV lately. I DVR’d a lot of stuff before I had my surgery – kind of “stocking up”, if you will – and I’m starting to get caught up. I finally got around to watching Love Monkey, just the first episode, and I’ve gotta say – so far, I like it a lot. I liked Tom Cavanaugh a lot in his guest appearances on Scrubs (I’ve never seen Ed, but it’s on my Netflix queue) and he’s really a likeable kinda guy, isn’t he? Also, it’s a good cast – Larenz Tate, Judy Greer (love her!), and Jason Priestly! Brandon Walsh, all grown up with a wife and kid on the way! Anyway, I recommend it. Also, speaking of television, I clicked over to Discovery Health one day last week for some reason or another, and when I did, Runway Moms was playing. I watched it for a few minutes and ended up setting up to tape it every day. It’s a total guilty pleasure, but I can’t help it – I love it! These gorgeous women with their gorgeous skin and their gorgeous pregnant bellies. I can’t look away. I watched If Only over the weekend (I DVR’d it a couple of weeks ago), the ABC Family movie with Jennifer Love Hewitt. Y’all just shut up, I think Jennifer Love Hewitt is as adorable as she can be, and I’ve loved her since she was on Party of Five. I even watched the awful POF spin-off, Time of Your Life. The movie wasn’t great, but it was good enough to spend two hours watching, at least in my opinion. And Fred and I watched several movies over the weekend: Half Light: Demi Moore plays a writer who loses her son and months later moves to a small Scottish village to get over her writer’s block. There are ghosts. Not a bad movie, especially considering I’d never heard of it before. Equilibrium: Christian Bale as an anti-sense enforcer. He takes his shirt off. Hubba hubba! Pretty good movie, for another one I’d never heard of. The Skeleton Key: Kate Hudson (cute as a button), hoodoo. I liked it more than I’d expected to. I also figured out the twist a split second before it happened, which I am sure gains me entry in some elite society somewhere. Perhaps the Brotherhood of Assholes Who Shout Out the Ending and Ruins it for Everyone? Lord of War: The Suck. We turned it off after about 15 minutes, but not before Jared Leto took his shirt off once or twice. Hubba hubba! (Yeah, I know he’s rumored to be a self-important asshole in real life, but he sure is purty to look at). * * * This is the outfit I’ve been wearing almost non-stop since I moved from my nightgown into “real” clothes: My sister sent me those pajama bottoms for Christmas last year, and they’re so oversized and comfy on me that they don’t hurt my belly button (the only part of me that hurts still). Of course I wash them every couple of days, ’cause I’m not THAT nasty. Also, the sweatshirt I wear with them is probably my favorite sweatshirt, so they make a good pair. * * * I got lots of flowers this past week; it was awesome! All my favorite flowers showed up, from daffodils to gladiolus to roses. Did I get pictures? Why, of course! From my parents, sister, and Brian. The glads have started to bloom, and they are GORGEOUS. From Jane and Nance. Don’t they rock? Daffodils, my favorite flower! Sugarbutt’s too, apparently. From Fred’s mom and stepfather. It’s actually a plant garden with a few flowers stuck in. Pretty, no? (Sugarbutt agrees) * * * My WordCloud Note that “fuck” isn’t on there anywhere. I think that means it’s not a true WordCloud. * * * Survivor spoiler; skip it if you didn’t see the first episode of Survivor: Exile Island. We taped Survivor on the CBS High Definition channel last week, and when we went to watch it, found that there were several very long patches of time where there was no freakin’ sound at all – I’d say at least half the show was without sound, if not more. That seems to happen a lot on CBSHD for some reason, and I guess in the future we’re going to have to tape it on the non-HD CBS. It ticks me off because the HD picture is so much better, but I’d rather have some idea of what’s going on than see a pretty picture. I was rooting for the “older” women until they voted off the only one who had any clue how to do anything at all. Dumbasses. * * * Sugarbutt enjoys some red beans and rice. The boy will eat ANYTHING. Tommy and his daddy bond over half-nekkid pictures of Jessica Simpson. A boy and his mouse look forlornly out at all the yummy birds. All of today’s uploaded pictures (those above, and a bunch more) are here. * * * Previously 2005: No entry. 2004: And then Fictional Woman and Fictional Child share an Isn’t he DISGUSTING? look, and bid each other goodnight. 2003: Taking a nap looks like a good idea. 2002: I decide who’s King Shit of Turd Mountain, y’all, and don’t forget it. 2001: Everyone enjoys a good fart story! 2000: No entry.]]>

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::::::: Hi, all! Thank you so much for your nice comments and emails. I haven’t been much for responding to emails this week, but I promise I’ll get to it in the next few days! Today, I think I might actually start to feel human in the near future. I spent all of Tuesday (after we got home from the hospital) and Wednesday zoning out on the couch, getting up to move around a little and sipping broth, jello (if one can sip jello!) and apple juice. Not to mention the water. I had to be at the hospital at 6:30 on Monday, and they didn’t take me back for surgery until close to 10:00. I swear, I was so nervous, I was ready to run out the door by the time they finally came. My surgeon told Fred that it was a picture-perfect operation, that my liver looked fine, and that they didn’t look at my gall bladder, because it was behind scar tissue (from my c-section). He said “It couldn’t have gone better”, in fact! Except for the nausea I had all day Monday (after the surgery) and Tuesday, I’ve been having some gas pains in my gut, and my abdomen itself has been sore right across the middle – especially my belly button – but it’s been nothing the hydrocodone hasn’t been able to knock out. The only thing I hate about the hydrocodone is the dopey feeling it gives me, so I’ve been cutting back, which is probably why I feel semi-human today. Speaking of the nausea, I had three bouts of violent retching, two at the hospital and one not long after I got home Tuesday, which scared the hell out of Fred. It finally went away – THANK GOD – because I hadn’t been expecting the nausea, even though one of the prescriptions they gave me at the surgeon’s office was anti-nausea medicine. I was able to sleep laying down last night, and it was HEAVEN – it made me very, very happy to be able to sleep on my side and not in a reclining position, and I slept pretty well. So, that’s the state of things with me. I haven’t stepped on a scale yet, and in fact I don’t think I will until I see my surgeon at my 2 week appointment, because I can tell I’m still bloated up with liquids – at least, my fingers feel swollen – and if I step on that scale and see a gain, even if I know it’s not a “real” gain – I might have to get out the rifle and shoot the damn thing. I promise I’ll write a more detailed account of the day of surgery – and the night after – in the next few days, but I thought I’d get something posted here to let y’all know how I was doing. Thanks again for your comments and emails. You guys rock! Spanky cracks me up, with his big pink lips. Tom Cullen, stowing away in the bag I took to the hospital.]]>