knew it, the way I know the sky is blue and Winter follows Fall. So many years of our lives were intertwined, and it seems that in every memory I have, for so many years, you were there. Years ago at the beach in the middle of summer, laying on the blanket, watching the kids play in the surf. I laid my cheek against you; you were cool and you soothed me. You were always what I needed. I thought you always would be. When it became clear to us that it was ending, that it had to end because we had no choice, I thought my heart would break. No. My heart did break. It shattered. I wondered how I would go on without you there beside me. I couldn’t stand it, to know that you were in the world and I could never again be with you. To know that you might go on to make another as happy as you spent so many years making me; I thought I would go crazy. I would lay awake at night crying, wondering where you were and what you were doing and with whom. It’s been so long now since I’ve felt you against my lips. It feels like yesterday sometimes, and at other times it feels like forever. I don’t know how this happened, but somehow I moved on. One day I woke up and told myself that I was not going to pine away for you forever. That it was time to pick up my life and put the pieces back together. And I did. I met someone else, and at first all I thought was “This is not my Beloved.” I knew that it could never work out – how could a relationship be formed when I still spent so much time with my mind on you? One tentative try became two. Two became four. For a long, long time I doubted this relationship, because I thought that it was only a fling to get me over you. But the oddest thing began happening. I began to go for a time without thinking of you, without feeling that pang in my heart, without thinking of you, out there in this world without me. At first it was only a short time – minutes. Over time, minutes became hours and days and then months. And I am in love. I have a True Love. A True Love who is not you. My True Love and I fit together in ways that you and I somehow never could. You and I simply were not right for each other, despite the times we tried and tried and tried again. There was a time I thought we’d always be together, but I was wrong. For a long time, the thought of you made me cry because you were in this world and I could not have you. And then the thought of you made me sad. Now? Now the thought of you makes me smile. We had so many wonderful times together, and I hope your memories of those times make you smile too, those times before the games began, before I tried to change you. What I thought was true love with you, I now realize was only a pale imitation. I hope with all my heart that you now have someone who loves you as much as I love my True Love. And I hope that when you think of me, it’s with a smile. On this day of giving thanks, what I am thankful for is that you were in my life. I am thankful that we were able to finally let each other go, and that my heart, which I thought would never heal, now loves more strongly than ever before. I am thankful for you, for all the time we had together. And I am thankful for my True Love and the future we have together. With love, Robyn November 27, 2000.]]>
2003-11-27
Oh Good Lord *rolling eyes*
You are such a cheeseball! You SO had me going. I was reading with intense interest. And then I click the link. Silly goose LOL
And me too, TOTALLY engaged, reading these heartfelt pleas to your One True Love.
I thought, has she gone soft in the head? This can’t be to Fred?! (sorry about the cheesy rhyme) and I thought PLEEEEEASSEE PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE Robyn And3rson, just be YOU. Why gawd Whyyyyyyy?
Then I realized that all is Right With The World, the moon still circles the earth.
Thank you for this excellent entry! And of course, Happy Thanksgiving from an ex-pat Wyoming woman!
Mary
laffing at her desk in cold cold Edmonton.
HA! I was soooo taken! Good one! Off to eat turkey in Coventry! Tomorrow I’m hittin the Providence Place Mall!!!! Armed with coupons, a protein bar and a huge bottle of water! YEAH BABAAAH~! Bring on Black Friday!!!!
HEY! This is a repeat!! See how loyal I am?
Happy T-giving. I am making Fred’s Sweet Potato Casserole! Wish me luck!
HA! My thoughts too! I knew there was no way you were saying all that about that other ex! Thanks for the smiles! Happy Thanksgiving.
I knew who you were talking about, for you and I share our One True Love. Fortunately, there is enough love for all of us.
From another admirer of your beloved, who had to –get up at the crack of dawn today, Thanksgiving, to run to Jack in the Box to get a 42 oz Diet Coke on ice, well done, I say
Hee, I’m so frightened. I knew by the first sentence exactly who/what you were talking about. You can’t fool me, oh no!
I got that one!
Oh my lord, I was thinking to myself “NO! Robyn and Fred can’t get a divorce…they are too perfect for eachother…if they can’t keep it together than me and mine have no chance in hell!!” Then I thought maybe it was a letter to the Spud’s dad from a long time ago…but then I realized how stupid that thought was based on what you’ve said about him previously…and then…and then….I clicked the LINK! And I was SO relieved 🙂 You little trickster…you really had us all going. Nevertheless, your words were beautiful…lol. What you wrote is exactly how I feel about diet mtn. dew btw.
(Where’s my emoticon for severe eye roll?)
This will just go to show you all how upset Jon’s performace updet me last night, I actually thought Fred had, had some sort of tragic ending. Then I thought Robyn would be too distraut to write, as I kept reading I thought this has to be about the Spud’s dad, then to find out it was diet coke… Really Robyn you should be ashamed of yourself you have to know that I overreact about everything and really that wasn’t fair. (brilliant writing however) Just makes me realize how much you deserve TubbyThatBastard. Happy Thanksgiving Americans!
You know you’ve been reading Bitcypoo too long when you figured out “who” the “True Love” was after the 2nd paragraph! LOL Still love it though. Thanks for the smiles! Happy Thanksgiving!
Okay I knew it had to be food or drink related, (I was thinking, I need to write this letter to chocolate someday…) and when I read “you were cool and soothed me”, yup, Diet Coke… but what I am wondering is, who is the FORMER beloved? Who is the letter actually TO? Regular Coke? Tab?
Well, I’m glad I got at least a FEW of you! 🙂
Donna – the letter’s to regular Coke – if you click on the link for November 27, 2000 at the bottom of the page, you’ll see the previous letter I wrote to Coke.
Heehee. I think you have sung the praises of Diet Coke too many times to fool the loyal Bitchypoo crowd! 🙂
Heh, I thought you were writing about cats, silly me! LOL!
I am a complete idiot, really I am. I thought it was from a book or movie or something. I knew that it wasn’t for Fred. Robyn and he are like a hand and a gove. They are just perfect for each other. And I knew it wasn’t the Spuds biological dad, so I was like thinking cats too, but then that didn’t seem right either. Then it finally hit me- DOH !
Heh.
~Denise~ in GA ( Diet Sprite aholic )
Hmphf. I read the letter wondering who the heck you were talking about ’cause I didn’t think it could possibly be about your ex! But I have a question – why did you switch from regular Coke? Isn’t it less bad for you than Diet Coke??? (I say that while I have a nice 20 oz bottle of Diet Coke in front of me. Yummmmmm.)
I KNEW it. But I’m with ya, sister. I prefer his metrosexual cousin, the Cherry variety.
Ok, so I am not so loyal as to have read memorized every word. It is NOT a repeat, but a brilliant piece of literature. I am awed.
Robyn:
I, too, have been reading for too long because I knew who/what you were talking about by about line three.
But I have a wake up call for you for you. Your true love has been spending an awful lot of time at my house lately. And girl, I’m ready to fight!!! You may have given up regular, but I gave up froo froo coffee drinks, so whose sacrifice is bigger, huh? Whose sacrifice is bigger?
Ok, because I am a dumbass? I didn’t notice the link at the end. And I was reading the entire thing waiting for you to mention Diet Coke and smiling at the cleverness of it all and then I got to the end and you didn’t and it sounded all of a sudden like it was written for Fred and- for just a brief second- it was really, really weird. And kind of gross.
And then I started reading the comments and realized I’m not the most observant reader on the planet.
Happy Thanksgiving.
Elissa – I gave up regular Coke solely for the calorie savings – 140 calories in a can o’ Coke. Fred’s nephew was drinking Coke yesterday and he put the can down next to me. I’ll admit that I DID give it “the eye.” Maybe I’m not as over Coke as I thought? 🙂
Laurie – please. Don’t make me send the Bean after you. Because he will ping-pong around the room at 3 am and make you cryyyyyyyy.
aaaahhhh…..I, too, recognised from whence this ode came….and I, too, share the sloppy sentiment…..only for the Diet Coke!!
I went on an anti-aspartame jag for about 8 days and nearly lost my mind.
and, sorry, too….didn’t mean to step on any kitty toes when I voted for Mr. Fancypants….I just always had a softspot in my heart for him, being fancy and all….and I miss him.