rurrrr, rurrrr, rurrrr.”
“Oh,” I said. “The growling sound they make when they play fight?”
“No,” she said. “The sound they make when they’re just laying there.”
“Purring? You don’t like the sound of them purring?”
“Yeah.”
Freak.
Stanley was so bothered by the fact that we kept the guest bedroom door shut at all times that every time the door would open, he’d haul ass in there and hide under the bed. One morning, Liz didn’t want to have to hunt him down, so she left the door open while she showered. The next morning, she discovered that some of her clothes had been peed upon. It appears that TubbyThatBastard found an opportunity to sneak in there and show his displeasure, and he seized said opportunity.
I was fucking MORTIFIED. I mean to have him PEE on the clothes of a houseguest, well, I wanted to kill that little fucker. ARGH.
At least Liz thought it was funny, or pretended to.
* * *
Pet store kitty pics are
here.
* * *
Yesterday it was sunny and close to 80. This morning, it’s rainy and 35. I was wanting it to cool off a LITTLE, but not THIS much. Brrrr. I’m glad I made Fred get the fireplace pilot lit, so that all I have to do is go into the living room and flip the switch to get the heat going.
I am in the midst of a raging case of PMS. Strangely, knowing that my mood (which makes me want to write very very bad poetry (“my world is gray and i am blue and the cat, she purrs. give me chocolate.”) and throw myself down on the bed and throw a temper tantrum) is due to PMS doesn’t make it go away. I know I’ll be over it in a day or two, but it sure is hellish while it’s here, goddamnit.
And the cold fucking weather doesn’t help at ALL. ARGH.
* * *
So those lily bulbs I was supposed to plant back at the beginning of the month? Still not planted. Still in the box they arrived in. Which is located next to the boxes of daffodil bulbs.
But that’s not the point.
The point is that when the lily bulbs arrived, I took the box and set it on the
desk next to the garage door. Later that evening Stanley began sniffing around the box, and I swear to y’all, it was as if he was sniffing around a big box of catnip. He immediately started acting high as a kite, and it was funny as hell.
(NOTE: I AM AWARE THAT LILY BULBS ARE POISONOUS TO CATS. THE BOX IS A SEALED BOX AND THE BEAN COULD NOT GET TO THE ACTUAL BULBS TO EAT THEM AND THUS POISON HIMSELF.)
I finally put the box of bulbs out in the garage so that Stanley would stop reeling around like he was on the tail-end of a three-day drunk, and thought no more about it. Except that this morning when I opened the door between the garage and the house, Stanley ran like hell out into the garage as he usually does. Instead of trying to chase him down, I just left the door open so he could come back inside whenever he wanted. Ten minutes later I went out to get something out of the big freezer, and what did I see?
That’s right, Stanley lolling about on the garage floor next to the box of lily bulbs, his eyes madly twirling.
So anyway, my question is thusly: have you ever heard of a cat getting high off lily bulbs? Just curious whether this is a wide-spread phenomenon or a Stanley-only kinda thing.
* * *
I’ll be taking the spud to get her learner’s permit this Friday. You can imagine how very much I’m looking forward to this.
* * *
Da Bean.
A year ago: Ah, pms. Ain’t life grand.
Two: Huh. I didn’t get online until after 12:30 (central time!) today, and the world didn’t stop and mourn me or anything. I don’t know if I like that.
Three: Robyn’s Theory of Feet
Four: If you look closely at the picture, you’ll note that it’s very close to the color of bile.]]>
I kinda LIKED your bad poetry ! ;o)
It’s no wonder you have dead kitties all over… poisioning them and all. funny how Robyn needs a new kitten (pet store kitties) she must be running low. LOL!! hope you feel better Robyn!
Hi Robyn — I’ve never had any experience with cats and lily bulbs, however, my cat, Mouse, goes crazy for the smell of celery. If I drop a piece on the floor she lunges for it, and rolls all over it, twisting and turning and rolling herself into a little tiny ball trying to cover the celery with her entire body. Yet, she doesn’t like the taste of it. Even if I just have the smell of celery on my hands, watch out! (She goes crazy for the smell of BenGay, too – so I think she’s just a really weird, yet lovable cat) ~~Winter
My sister’s cat goes nuts for bleach. If Joy is cleaning her bathroom with Tilex, there’s Boots, sniffing for all she’s worth. Just this weekend, Joy was touching up spots on the carpeting and Boots followed her everywhere, wanting to roll on the bleached spots. Silly thing.
Peeing on a guest’s clothes – I can top that. I went to meet with a future business partner and stayed at her home. Arrived back home to find hard cat poo pellets in the bottom of my suitcase. Luckily, this has been a fruitful partnership, made more so, apparently, by the kitty blessing…
We had a cat that went nuts for BenGay too, rubbing all over it and trying to lick it off your leg or wherever you had smeared the BenGay. She also liked a particular perfume of my mom’s, and would roll all around on the carpet after my mom had sprayed it, trying to get the scent on herself. She was a strange cat, RIP Peaches.
I cannot BELIEVE the Spud is going to be driving!! Good luck with that, Robyn.
Put some strawberries out for them someday. When the berries reach room temperature, I’m betting that at least a couple of the cats are going to get very friendly with them. And it’s hilarious to watch them rolling in berries.
My cat Pumpkin went crazy over SeaBreeze. (the stuff you use to clean your face)
I had a cat who loved ground coffee. She would loll and roll and act stoned. And I have had several cats react to Lysol concentrated cleaner. They love it when I clean with it, rubbing themselves all over the bathroom floor.
Tubby. Poisonous bulbs. Hmm.
Robyn,
Have you ever tried taking Evening Primrose Oil supplements? I swear, it totally knocks the PMS issue out. Just a thought.
My dear cat, Winnie (RIP) used to insist on sniffing GRAPES if we were eating them. She never wanted to eat one or have one to play with, but she adored the scent of them. We could simply NOT sit down with a bowl of grapes and not offer her one to sniff.
Bean amazes me, he is so completely cat like and so full of beans and personality, I love him. If he ever gets scared of the Spud driving or of Tubby’s peeingness or if he worries that he might die and have his photo taken, and would like to come up for a visit, he’d be more than welcome. I can offer many old sweaters for him to make nests in. Cats need treats and I’d sure have lots for him. So, Bean, just remember, my door is always open. You little Bean, you!
My cat loves powder! if you you have just used it..she is just smelling it like she is in LOVE!!!!
Snoopy loves vaseline, of all things, and whenever she hears me take the lid off the container in the bathroom, she comes running and tries with all her might to get at it and lick it up. She also likes to lick on a sudsy bar of soap (the WalMart brand of Dove, specifically). Weirdness…. She’s acting weird anyway because, somehow, with her cat-ness, she knows I am getting ready to leave town for a few days and is being super-clingy. (And yes she’ll be taken care of while I’m gone.)
My gosh, Melanie and Jane have a point……If Tubby mysteriously passes away during the night, the authorities should check Tubby’s system for lily bulbs. And then Fred would be writing about how his Robyn was arrested and convicted by forensic evidence uncovered by C.S.I. Alabama
Richard
Drivers permit!! My son got his in September, and although he has greatly improved in his driving I still find myself clenching my fists unseen when he is driving. Oh my!
I’m loving the “cat’s favorite” stories! My oldest cat Tweak LOVES the smell of my hubby’s feet after work…is that sick and twisted or what?? He will RUB on him and WHINE until my husband takes off his shoes…then Tweak will try to STUFF himself inside the shoe and just lay there for a while. Good reason to call him Tweak the Freak eh??
Teenagers…driving…horror…
Autumn from the pet store is GORGEOUS!
And did other people notice that a year ago, Robyn wrote about PMS!
I, too, enjoy reading about what kitties love!