It’s Veteran’s Day, Americans. Take a moment to remember and thank those who are willing to serve and protect this country as well as those who died doing so.
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I had sushi rolls – California rolls – for breakfast this morning, and they were mighty fucking fine. Certainly beats my usual scrambled-eggs-and-fruit by a mile.
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I have 120 daffodil bulbs and about 60 lily bulbs to plant. I should be out there doing it right now, but I don’t wanna. Tomorrow’s supposed to be somewhat warm, with thunder showers in the afternoon, followed by a cold front. I’m guessing that my ass will be outside digging a bed to plant the bulbs tomorrow morning, is what I’m guessing. Hmm. If I’d planned better, we could have had BitchyCon this week, and the price of attendance would have been digging in the back yard.
That’s what I get for never planning ahead.
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There are a bunch of car places that I pass on the way to and from the pet store. Last week as I was driving to the pet store, I saw a gorgeous little yellow car, and naturally became interested.
Until I saw the price on the windshield. $35,999. Yikes! I promise y’all, even if the day comes that I have $35,999 laying around, I will never own a car worth that much money. I might splurge on a $15,000 car and spend the rest on books, but I’d just be scared to drive a car worth that much money around. I mean, what if I got a scratch on it? They’d probably charge thousands and thousands of dollars to fix it, right?
I’d be much happier in a yellow Beetle, I’m sure. Coincidentally, there’s a yellow Beetle for sale (WITH a sunroof!) on the road I drive down to get to the post office. It seems to be in excellent shape and can’t be more than a few years old. And it has a sunroof!
Wouldn’t that be an excellent Christmas present? You should go mention that to Fred, really you should.
(Not holding my breath – but a girl can dream!)
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When bitching about Christmas shopping and all that yesterday, I probably should have mentioned that last year I went shopping the day after Christmas and bought some serious bargains for several people on the spud’s Christmas list – her father’s parents and sister. I’ve also started making my list (though I didn’t check it twice) so that when November 28th comes along, I’ll be ready to start shopping.
Or at least ordering things online.
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If you’re in the process – or ever will be in the process – of looking for a bank through which to get your mortgage, here’s some advice for you. Do NOT go with the “small, friendly” bank, because within two months the motherfuckers will sell your fucking mortgage to a huge bank like Chase Manhattan, and what will Chase Manhattan do? Why, Chase Manhattan will decide they’re certainly not getting enough money from you, and Chase Manhattan will include a fucking advertisement with every mortgage statement, telling you that for A SMALL MONTHLY FEE, they could transfer half your mortgage payment AUTOMATICALLY every two weeks, and over the life of the loan, you’ll save THOUSANDS. And yet, when you point out that you could easily just WRITE a check every two weeks for half your mortgage payment and mail it to Chase Manhattan for a SMALL FEE of 37 cents each time, which adds up roughly to 74 cents every four weeks (not including the cost of the envelope, the cost of your time to write out the check and lick the envelope, and also let’s NOT forget about the time-intensive addressing of the envelope), and that doing that yourself rather than letting Chase Manhattan do it and charge you for having done it will save you THOUSANDS over time, they have no response.
Also, those Chase Manhattan motherfuckers, who have your home phone number, because you had to give it to them when you filled out the paperwork, because they don’t want cell phones, oh no, those fuckers will call you on the average once a week to offer you some new hair-brained money-saving bargain. And believe you me, once those fuckers start talking, they don’t stop to take a breath, and so you have to just interrupt them and say “SO SORRY, NOT INTERESTED, CHASE MANHATTAN CAN BITE MY ASS, BUH-BYE!” and then hang up.
Never once did I ever get a single call from AmSouth when they had our mortgage when we lived in the other house, is what I’m saying.
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No new cat pictures, so here are some oldies but goodies:
This is when Tubby was a svelte young thing.
Spot, the Washington Journal reporter.
Baby Spanky!
This picture of Miz Poo cracks me up, because a) it was not long after her surgery last year, when she had a bit of her lip cut out and tested for cancer (it tested negative) and b) the sticker over her head, which reads “Aren’t we just a ray of fucking sunshine”.
I sure do miss that evil, fancy bastard.
Not an old picture, but it cracks me up.
A year ago: “… after doing the laundry, I had sex on the kitchen floor with Fred once again. Floor continues to be TOO FUCKING COLD…”
Four: Smile and nod, and she’ll go on forever.]]>
Robyn! Where’s our movie of the week?! I need some Stanely Beannieness or some Tubby Bitchiness or some Spanky Chattiness on the stairs. Pleeeeeeeease.
I got an update Robyn, so please ignore the e-mail I sent late last night :o) The pic story was side splitting !!
~Denise~ in Georgia
Hiya Robyn-
Just a note to say thank you for posting your daily ruminations during the week. I look forward to reading your posts when I am sitting at work on dull, dull, dull, dull boring days here like today. Life is a whole lot less boring when I can look at kitty pictures and snicker at your complaints about the mortgage company calling you trying to wheel and deal. I hate that too. It’s like, “if I wanted to change anything with my account, I’d fucking call and tell you! Don’t call ME, I’ll call YOU!” Bastards. 😉
Cheers,
Lisa
Michelle – tomorrow, I promise! 🙂
Denise – then ignore all that unsubscribing and resubscribing I did, trying to get it to work. Heh! 🙂
Lisa – anything to help make the work day a little more bearable! 🙂
oh my hell Spanky was a fucking cute kitten….I love that pic!! Were all your cats kittens when you adopted? If so you must post kitten pics of all five…that would make us all real happy. Or at least me 🙂
I need a new cat video … It’s like crack … I need a new video … PLEASEEEEEE
I always thought Miz Poo sort of looked like she had a hairlip but then I thought maybe it was her coloring/markings cause I’ve never seen a hairlip cat. But after her surgery – she really looked like a hairlipped kitty. Not to be making fun of the hairlipped or anything. I’m hair over the lip so – I think I can say that. Again, no offense I love me some Miz Poo pictures.
Robyn, do you watch Average Joe and if so, what did you think of last night’s episode? Also, who do you think The Bachelor is going to choose? My bets on Kelly Jo.
Who is the “evil fancy bastard”? And what happened to him?
New lurker here…
Robyn,
I have to agree with Lisa, who did a comment early, and I must say, I do enjoy reading your blog, and sitting here on my ass everyday at work, I do need some humour in it. Thanks a bunch for making a Colorado girl smile !!! BTW- We have Chase for our house also, and that are a pain in the behind.
Ami
Robyn, I had to come back and read last year’s entry. The whole box thing had me laughing out loud. There were tears and everything! I can just hear Spanky singing that little song to himself. And it’s so amusing to think that Miz Poo gets her princess self in a tizzy because someone else has the GALL to sit in the box. Hee hee!
I had to chime in I was LMAO at last years entry and linked to the “nekkid Fred” story. I had forgot about that one! Sounds like something that would happen to me.
Been there done that with Chase. You have to TELL them to take them off their list. Then they will do a little verification and voila you will not be called anymore. You have to specifically say something like ” How do I get on your do not call list'”
Good luck!
How much do you want for that nekkid pic of Fred ??
Lisa – most of them were kittens. I’ll dig through my cat pictures to see what I can find for you!
Shannon – tomorrow, I promise!
Joni – her lip used to be swollen, thus causing the harelip look, and then once they took a chunk out to test it for cancer, it made a rather permanent harelip look. I know she looks funny, but she’s my favorite kitty (shhh, don’t tell the other kitties!) and thus still beautiful in my eyes. Heh.
Amy – I do watch Average Joe, but we haven’t watched last night’s episode yet; we’re going to watch it tonight. As for The Bachelor, I think that Kelly Jo’s going to be the one who ends up with Bob in the end – I love her!
Pandora – the evil fancy bastard is Mr. Fancypants. He was the only one of our cats who was able to jump over the fence, and he would do just that, but he always came home at night. One night he didn’t come home – this was at the beginning of this past summer – and he hasn’t come home since. We still hope he’ll wander home one of these days. I think he and Stanley would get along like a house on fire. 🙂
Rugbypet – I only wish I still had it! 🙂
Trust me I know the feeling about Chase Manhatten. I had the run around with them and they “don’t accept half payments.” Theya re getting a chunk of my check so they better take what they are getting:)
Hi robyn
I dont think i’ve ever emailed you before but i’ve been reading it for almost 2 years now and also read freds. I also once won a book from you once long time ago slightly single and to prove how much of a procrastinator I am i’ve yet to read it lol…love your site miss fancypants too 🙁
ps
im addicted to bitchypoo i chk daily even weekends hoping you’d post even though you rarely do. a girl can hope right?
NO, ROBYN!!!!!!
NOT MIZ POO AGAIN, THOSE EYES!!!SHES THE DEVIL I SAY!! THE PICTURES YOU ARE POSTING OF MIZ DEVIL ARE EVIL!!!! THE EYES ARE CALLING TO ME.
WHAT MIZ POO.
YOU SAY FOR ME TO RUN OUT TO TACO BELL AND BUY SOME BEEF SUPREME CHALUPAS AND A MEXICAN PIZZA. NO!!!!!!!!
Unfortunately, the bitch princess attitude isn’t confined to girls, as I’m discovering with my own 14-year-old bitch prince. :-\
BitchyCon sounds like fun, despite the backyard digging. Can we swap bitchy stories about children who refuse to clean up after themselves? I’m there!