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Friday evening Fred and I were watching TV, and I said, dreamily, “Just think! This time tomorrow night we’ll be sitting on our new couches, watching War of the Worlds with your parents, and I’ll be all kicked back and comfy!”
Fred turned to me, a horrified look on his face. “Bessie,” he said. “You would recline in front of company?”
“Well, GODDAMN,” I said. “NOT NOW, I won’t! I was GOING to, but now that I know you’d be sitting there all horrified about me reclining my seat in front of your parents, all worried that they’d be thinking ‘Good christ, look at her over there, so fucking LAZY she can’t expend the ENERGY to sit upright!’, I won’t! I wouldn’t DREAM of reclining on my OWN couch in my OWN home, I would HATE to embarrass you!”
By this point, Fred was guffawing so hard that it took a few minutes before he could speak again.
“That is NOT what I meant!” he said. “It just seems a little… relaxed to be reclining with company in the house. Like… like…”
“Hanging out in your pajamas?” I suggested.
“EXACTLY!” he agreed.
Saturday morning, the guys who were delivering our new couches showed up half an hour before the beginning of the three-hour window we’d been told about. I was just getting out of the shower when Fred came upstairs, all wild-eyed.
“They’re here!” he said.
“HERE?” I said.
“Yeah, they just called to let me know they’re in the subdivision, and will be right here!”
“Well, shit,” I said, and quickly got dressed and ran downstairs to help move the old couch and loveseat into the garage. The guys who were delivering the new couches actually ended up moving the old furniture into the garage in no time flat, and then they quickly brought in the new couches and put them exactly where we wanted them.
“You need to check and make sure the mechanisms in the recliners are working right,” the head delivery guy said.
And the three of us stood and watched as Fred went from recliner to recliner, sitting and extending each to its full horizontal position, looking very uncomfortable. And I LAUGHED MY ASS OFF.
Karma, it is a boomerang.
(And for the record, Fred’s father and stepmother reclined almost as soon as they sat down, immediately followed by FRED. I held out for about ten minutes, but couldn’t resist the siren call of the half-laying position for any longer than that.)
* * *
So, to give you some idea of what our old couch and loveseat looked like, I took this from the
House Tour page (which desperately needs to be redone, because nothing in the house is like it was when I did that series of pictures 4 years ago):
And with the new couches:
I am aware, for the record, that those are some hideously ugly couches – the color of baby poop, I believe I told Fred – but they are sooooo comfy, and besides, who the hell do we have to impress? That’s right, NO ONE. I was concerned that the kittens weren’t going to be able to get under the couch – they like to hang out under there – but they actually have no problem getting under there. So, we’re all happy!
* * *
Fred has been a painting fool. Thursday afternoon he had the spud help him move everything out of the guest bedroom, and Friday he spent a good part of the day painting. By Friday evening, everything was moved back into the freshly painted room.
Here’s a before picture, stolen from the House Tours page (none of the furniture in that room is still there, because it used to be Fred’s room, and then he and I switched beds, blah blah blah, but this gives you some idea of the color of the walls):
Annnnnnd, after:
When Fred first showed me the paint, I honestly wasn’t sure. Because I’d expected him to come home with a dark wine color, and this looked more to me like Pepto pink. But once it was up on the walls and dry, I decided it was more of a dark rose color (even though the name of it was “burgundy 1”), and the more I look at it, the more I like it.
And THEN, Friday night while we were watching TV, we discussed what color he might paint the dining room. It’s the only room in the house with a chair rail, and he was thinking of painting the top one color and the bottom another. We discussed many different color combinations, and I finally just told him that whatever he chose would be fine with me. Saturday morning he went to Lowe’s and then to the grocery store, and came home to show me what he’d chosen. He spent most of Saturday painting, and once again when I looked at the result, I really liked it.
Before (another picture taken from the House Tour page):
And after:
The bottom looks like it’s black, but it’s actually a very dark green – Blackened Pine, is the name. The top is White Pepper, and it’s gray, though it looks almost lavendar in the picture.
That man o’ mine, he’s got a talent for picking out paint, doesn’t he?
I think next weekend he’s going to paint the spud’s bedroom. Stay tuned for more before and after pictures!
Tom Cullen thinks it was awfully nice of The Daddy to paint the kitten room to match the kitten cubes!
* * *
Considering the amount of gas these two produce, having their heads so close to each others’ gas-output outlets doesn’t seem very safe to me.
If there was only something I could do to make him less miserable…
All of today’s uploaded pictures are
here.
* * *
Previously
2004: What If?
2003: Fred’s sister nodded. “That’s what I figured.”
2002: I forgot that teenagers are, on the whole (though yours may be different, or at least pulling the wool over your eyes) bone idle.
2001: McAfee rocks.
2000: Recent purchases.
1999: I informed him that there was no way he was getting out of taking me to the emergency room for this.]]>
Nice! All of the rooms he’s painted are very nice.
Most people are afraid of using colors that dark. I love them and think they are a huge improvement 🙂
You are so right, that man’o’yoren is a painting maniac. He’s a painting pro, thats for surrrre…..That picture of Sugarbutt (the last one), cracked me up. He looks like he’s in (How do you say) HOG HEAVEN!!! nanamama 😉
If I send you pictures of my house could you have Fred suggest paint colors. I love the choices and I am happy that you will update your house tour. Every once in a while I look at it to dream a little. Did you notice that your couch has a spot on it. No I am sure it doesn’t have a spot on the fabric. It is from the camera. We get these all the time and my kids think our house is haunted and that the circles are some phenonum or ora. Not sure of the spelling of either of those words. Feel free to correct my spelling. They show up in some pictures and not in others. Sometimes it will be like 0n your head. Quite funny. On your clothing or in your lap. Just look at your other pictures and you will start noticing them. One night we stayed up all night taking pictures of our house and property outside and we were amazed at the circles and they sometimes are quite large. My son in law said it’s just dust. Ha? We had a lot of fun and laughed our asses off. I was just wondering if you tipped those delivery men for moving your furniture? Just wondering about other parts of the country? My son delivers for a very large company and usually gets some nice tips for extra services like that. When it snows people will give him a shovel and ask them not to bring in the snow. Can’t tell you what he thinks about that one, but actually ended up doing it for the old guy. That is an extra service they performed and alot of people don’t think of it. But you go to a restraunant and tip the girl ,20%, to bring you a dish of food. What the fuck is that about, and they forget to bring you an extra napkin or a much needed spoon. Oh, well, I was just wondering. I wish I lived closer so I could pick up your old furniture. I just loved it and the material. You will give it to charity. Please do, so many people are without right now. Love you guys. Mar
I totally want to paint my rooms now. How much does he charge?! 🙂
I think the new couches look much better than the old ones. I prefer solid colors on furniture.
Great job painting, Fred!
That last photo of Sugarbutt… SO cute! Must make that my new desktop background. Nuthin’ like a happy kitten.
Great job, Fred! I especially like the dark green/gray combo in the dining room.
My favorites the Dining Room. Nice Job Fred!!
LOVE the couches! Makes the room much cozier looking. Love the paint jobs! Can’t wait to visit and see them in person.
I love all the vibrant colors Fred has painted. My entire house has all sorts of different colors in every room and I like it a lot.
And Sugarbutt is just the sweetest thing there is!
Totally off topic:
1. Please do the Kitty Calendar soon because I want to give them as Christmas presents and at the same time be able to give to the shelter.
2. I couldn’t find pictures of Mia’s kittens in the cat pages. I miss Oy.
Your dining room looks great. Gives me some ideas of what color to paint mine.
Watch that you don’t close the recliner on one of the kittens. The mechanics under there can squash a cat, as my daughter found out when she first got her recliner. Now the cat won’t go anywhere near the couch.
The picture of the bed in the guest room cracked me up, it looks like a body is under the kevers… haha
That Sugarbutt is one adorable kitten!
I love all the new paint colors—Fred did a great job. That photo of Sugarbutt is priceless—poor suffering cat!!
Boy aren’t colors fun. I painted my entire condo in about 3 weeks not too long ago. It was solid “off-white”. I swear that I never will have any form of white in my home. My great room (living, dining & kitchen) is a very light gray which looks blue or purple at different times. The rest of the house is bright colors but not as bold as yours!
OBLW: I did break down and buy the Litter Robot. I heart you and your brother(??I think it was him) for mentioning it. I love it. I was worried that the 3 lovelies would not dig it so I kept all the boxes in case I had to return it. On Wednesday, I finally took the other boxes away. I watched as one cat looked and looked for an alternative before I finally got him in the dome. He’s fine now – I needed to add a step for him. He, of course, totally leaps over the step that activates the invention, but it still gets cleaned out when the others use it. It’s an expensive keeper! Now I want another. . . Kitten not Robot Ha ha!
Send Fred over NOW!
are you going to keep Sugarbutt?
Marion: Fred says he won’t choose colors for other people ’cause he’s afraid they won’t like the results and blame him! 🙂 No, we didn’t tip the delivery guys, ’cause it didn’t occur to us!
Fabooboo: I’m working on getting the pictures together for the calendars; I sure do take a LOT of pictures! 🙂 For the time being, you can see pictures of Oy here. I haven’t had a chance to get a page up for Mia’s babies yet, but I do intend to!
Peggy: We’re careful, because I’d hate to end up with a Sugarbutt pancake!
Val: You know, in the 4 years we’ve lived here, and the 3 years we lived in the other house, it just never occurred to me to paint the walls a different color. I chalk it up to the fact that I grew up in base housing, and the walls couldn’t be painted (or had to be painted white again when you moved out), so I’m very used to white walls. I’m enjoying seeing some color on the walls! I’m glad the Litter Robot’s working well for you!
Jonica: Yes.
i love sugarbutt more than words can say.
LOVE the colors. Especially the dining room. Almost makes me want to get off my ass and starting painting our apartment…since we’ve had the paint for a few months already!!
Dear Fred…I’d like to hire you. You see, three years ago we chose a very AWFUL color for our kitchen AND it took us three days to tape off and paint. Apparently you have the knack for good color choice and speedy painting. Just what is your secret?