Help send Lanna Lee to Kansas!
When Fred runs errands in town, he uses my car. His car is better on gas than mine, but my car is bigger and will hold more bags of pig and chicken feed and stuff like that. When he uses my car, he leaves the seat all the way back (RUDE) and leaves the radio on the station he likes to listen to (also RUDE). Lately, he’s been listening to a radio station that plays old country songs.
He explained to me that he likes that station because “Back then, songs told a story and these days, songs really don’t.”
(Tell me more about the olden days, Methuselah!)
So I’ve been subjected to old country songs lately, because unless there’s a blithering idiot of a morning team on my radio, I don’t tend to notice what station it’s on unless there’s a particularly annoying song playing, whereupon I change the station. The old country songs station doesn’t have an annoying, unfunny morning team, just a DJ who mostly keeps his yap shut and plays music.
I was running errands last week, and half paying attention to the song on the radio, and then my brain kicked in, and I thought “Wait, what? What’s this song saying?”
My brain seemed to be under the impression that the plot of the song could be summarized like such: I got a letter from an old girlfriend who’s still hung up on me. She was all “Blah de blah” and asked me lots of questions, and then she said, all casual-like “Call me sometime, and oh by the way, are you still drinking these days? JUST CURIOUS!” So I called her up and managed to stumble over my words, but eventually told her that no, I wasn’t drinking any more. Then we hung up the phone and I was all “Grrr! I’m such a LIAR! How am I gonna tell her the truth? She DESERVES to know the truth for some reason!” I pondered and thought and pondered some more, and then I was all EUREKA! So I sent her wine-colored roses so she’d know I’m still on the sauce! So I did! And I guess she did! But this story has no follow-through, so it shall be left to the listener! I assume she was all “Roses, he loves me! But they’re WINE-COLORED! He’s still throwin’ ’em back! Le sob!” The end.
The more I thought about it, the more I was like “That is an utterly ridiculous – seriously? She gets wine-colored roses and is supposed to extrapolate from that that he’s still drinking? I think you heard that incorrectly, dummy, because you were only half-listening since the other half your brain was thinking about KITTENS. You got it wrong, I’m sure.”
Then I forgot about it for a few days, and one night at bedtime, Fred and I were talking about something, and I remembered and told him the plot as I remembered it. He laughed, and then after he went to bed, I searched for the lyrics (I remembered the “Wine-colored roses” part of the song), and voila.
Is it just me, or is George Jones being juuuuuust a little too subtle with the message-sending-through-rose-delivery? Because I feel that the old girlfriend could very likely be utterly THRILLED to find herself the recipient of roses, and the color (which some of we ignorant types might just refer to as “reddish-purple”) might go right over her head. She might be all “Roses! He DOES still love me back!” and then start planning their wedding. So he’s all “Hmm. She knows I’m drinking, and she’s A-OK with it!”, and she’s all “He’s not drinking any more (he told me so!), AND he sends me roses to show me that he loves me!”
Maybe once she discovers that he likes to send messages via rose color, she’ll learn to respond in kind. What color rose indicates “I’m leaving you for a richer (nondrinking) man”? Green?
No, wait. I think green indicates “You gave me herpes.”
By the by, if you’re ever looking for a country song that is EXCELLENT for singing along to, one that’s SUPER twangy and country, you can’t do better than D-I-V-O-R-C-E. I discovered that I know every damn word to that song, and sang it at the top of my lungs in the shower the other morning. Gotta love Tammy.
DEE-AH-VEE-OH-ARRR-SEE-EEEEEEEEEEEE BECAME FAHNAL TODAYYYYYYYYY! ME AN’ LIT-TUHL JAY-OH-EEEEE WEEL BEEE GO-IN’ A-WAYYYYY!
PS: This is just a little Peyton Place and you’re all Harper Valley hypocrites.
PPS: Someone needs to remake that one and tell the Harper Valley PTA to go fuck themselves.
Previously
2011: I swear to god it’s about time to turn on the closed captioning when I watch TV.
2010: Oh skimmers, why can’t I quit you?
2009: No entry.
2008: No entry.
2007: No, my number one concern is that a woman, somewhere in Alabama, might have purchased a device to ensure that she’s able to get off.
2006: The stinkin’ kitten is not so cute!
2005: Annnnnnnnd that’s just a little glimpse into the dorkiness that is my life.
2004: ARRRGH.
2003: No entry.
2002: Wow. Apparently I’ve been doing the pet store thing for three years now.
2001: Day Zero.
2000: I’m back!
Now don’t get me wrong, I like me some old country music, but George Jones is hilariously awful.
Tell Fred to go listen to Jason Isbell. Stories, seriously. The Here We Rest album is particularly good. (He’s from your neck of the woods, I believe.)
The old time ‘beer drinking, tear jerking’ kind of music is the best. “here’s a quarter,call someone who cares”~~~”tonight the bottle let me down”,~~ “ugly girls are prettier at closing time,” ~~ “there’s a tear in my beer”, I have my memories.
I am LOLing (in a friendly, polite way!) at the thought of these being considered “old time” country. (Tear on my Beer would count if Hank Sr had recorded it when he wrote it, back in the 50’s or 60’s IIRC, but as far as I know he never did.)
Tom T Hall is one of my favorite singer/songwriters, bc of his knack for telling stories that aren’t particularly thrilling in and of themselves, but leave a lasting impression anyway. Give “Trip to Hyden,” “It Sure Does Get Cold in Des Moines,” or “The Man Who Shot Himself” a listen if you’re interested. Other personal picks for story-songs are Johnny Horton (and lots of incredibly, horribly racist crap gets wrongfully attributed to him) and Jimmy Dean. Donna Fargo had some good sing-along stuff, but even better than Tammy (imo) is Loretta Lynn – “Fist City” gets stuck in my head every so often & is great for belting out at top volume.
I like country well enough in general, but it’s been steadily losing appeal for me since the late 70s… and I was only born in 68!! I still love all the old stuff but even the GOOD newcomers just can’t hold a candle to the oldtimers.
ah, those white go-go boots.
Harper Valley PTA always reminds me of this, which came out 2 years earlier:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZt5Q-u4crc
I like a couple of newer country artists. For instance, I think Alison Kraus has the most beautiful voice EVER!! If you want a story song, I dare you to listen to Jacob’s Dream. Look it up on youtube and I dare you to not cry your eyes out for at least 30 minutes. Listen to the words and the guitar playing is awesome. OMG!! I almost died when I heard that song. I will kill the songwriters if I ever find them. LOL Let me know what you think in your next post. (that’s your homework)
I like the old country music better too. My mom is a huge country fan and prefers the old stuff. I remember Harper Valley PTA and D-I-V-O-R-C-E too. I loved to belt out the latter when I was a kid. I don’t remember the one you are talking about. Burgundy roses would be considered red, wouldn’t they? Red roses mean love. There is a meaning to the different colors. I know yellow is friendship. Anyway if a man sent me red/burgundy roses I would think it was true love. George Jones was a crazy abusive drunk. Wasn’t he married to Tammy Wynette and abusive to her? She died way too young. My sister and her 18 year old son love the new country music. I like Alyson Kraus too. I think of her as Bluegrass though. That’s my husband’s favorite music and he’s her seen at several Bluegrass Festivals.
Harper Valley PTA was my Mom’s theme song back in the 70’s. It fit her to a T.
I love singing (with the radio) to Harper Valley PTA! Also, an easy one to sing to is The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia. Hey, Robyn, let’s go do karaoke some time!
I totally played my daughter the Harper Valley PTA song yesterday. She totally got into it and was going off on the PTA. LOLZ
I only like the old country artists, too…George Jones, Johnny Cash, Tammy, Loretta and Dolly. They all get played when I’ve got a project to do that I’m feeling sorry for myself about.
I read a great bio about Tammy Wynette earlier this year and, man, what a bad ending for such a great talent.
Wow. I’m in Australia and where I grew up country music was virtually non existent. D-I-V-O-R-C-E was the FIRST ever country song I ever heard and I loved it. The second country song I ever hear was Paper Roses and I loved that too