* * *
People, I just don’t get it. I don’t get how the previous owners of our new house lived in it like that. Because seriously, the paint job makes my teeth hurt. There’s a spot in the yellow bathroom where they apparently needed to do some touch-up painting, and what color paint did they use to touch up the yellow bathroom? Why, orange. OBVIOUSLY.
It was my hypothesis that the previous owners and their five (!) kids moved into the house and thought they’d be there for years, and that they could take their time to get the house looking the way they wanted. Then her mother went into a nursing home and they wanted to be closer to her, so they had to give the house a lick and a promise and hoped to sell it to people who could recognize the lovely underlying bones of the house.
Like us.
If I could point to one single room where the paint job was anything better than slapdash, I might be able to stand behind my hypothesis. However, I cannot say “The master bedroom (or the living room or the computer room or ANY room) is well-painted and the trim is neatly painted. Obviously they finished off this room and then realized they were going to have to move.”, because there ARE no rooms like that. And it isn’t like the rooms were carefully painted and it’s just the result of wear and tear that they look like they do now. On the ceiling in at least one of the rooms, the ceiling is painted pretty well, but they painted up TO the light fixture, and then there’s this whole area around the light fixture that is unpainted.
Then there’s the dirt. See, I really like the previous owners, and they seem like nice people, but the fact that I spent an hour and a half cleaning a CLOSET last night (scrubbing the floor twice to get it somewhat clean, the walls, the ceiling, the shelves) makes me wonder what was going on. He seems to work long hours and she’s a stay-at-home mom with five kids (the oldest three being college aged) and I’m sure her life is a busy one, so did she think the kids were keeping their rooms and closets clean, but they were just shoving everything in the closet and when it was time to move it was just like “Oh good lord, just pack everything up and we’ll let the new owners worry about cleaning the closet!”?
I don’t know. But I must say, it’s more gratifying to clean a filthy closet than a mostly-clean one, because you can see a huge difference when you’re done.
I was originally going to help Fred put a second coat of primer on the walls in the guest bedroom, but Fred ended up determining that one coat was enough, so after we went and registered my car, we went to Lowe’s and decided on a paint color, and when we got to the house Fred carried everything upstairs and I went upstairs to look and get my painting mojo going, but then I opened the closet and LORD.
“Oh, NOTHING’S happening in this closet ’til I clean!” I declared. And like I said, I spent the next hour and a half cleaning the closet, taking down nails and screws, and scrubbing the floor, twice.
(And I still feel like it could use a third scrubbing.)
Once the closet was done, I taped around the baseboards and doorways so Fred could do around the trim without painting it blue (a lovely smokey blue is what we decided on for the guest bedroom, by the way), and then we took a break and sat on the front porch in the dark and had a snack (I had an apple, and it was good) and we watched the cars go by.
So then he went upstairs and painted around the trim and I took the blinds and went into the other room and cleaned each and every slat of the blinds, and then I scrubbed the baseboards around what will be the spud’s bedroom, which took us past eight o’clock, so we headed for home.
Tonight, I’m cleaning the closets in what will be the spud’s bedroom (there are two!), which are even worse than the closet last night (and tonight I’m taking the camera with me to show you!), and then I have to tape around the baseboards and doorways so Fred can begin with the primering priming of the spud’s bedroom.
I feel like we’re making really good progress. Originally Fred was going to primer the entire house before he started painting, but now he’s thinking he’ll completely finish out one room at a time, instead. I can’t wait to show you pictures of the guest bedroom, once it’s finished!
* * *
Because when I have the radio going, it’s usually country music, I generally hear
Paul Harvey at least once a day. I like Paul Harvey enough, I suppose, I usually hear at least one interesting tidbit of news each time I listen to him.
But he annoys me a little, too. For one, he likes to say “Half a hundred” instead of “fifty.” Why? WHY, Paul Harvey? “Fifty” is so much more timesaving than “half a hundred” and so much less ANNOYING, too, why be pretentious? WHY?
And the other thing he does that invariably annoys me enough so that if I realize it’s coming I’ll turn the radio off or to another channel, is the bit at the end, where he tells a story that is – at the most – mildly humorous. Then he signs off the broadcast by saying “Good day!”, but he says it with this sound to his voice like he is THIS CLOSE to busting out laughing, because the story he told? SO FUNNY. SO SO SO FUNNY. Paul Harvey can barely contain his hysterical laughter at such a funny story, but because he is a PROFESSIONAL, he will contain himself, though you should know that the instant he signs off the air, he will fall over backwards and hold onto his gut and he will let forth gales of laughter.
This reminds me of the people online who use LOL as a punctuation mark. Now, I’m not a fan of LOL, but I do realize that it’s gone from meaning “I am sitting here laughing out loud so hard I’m PEEING MY PANTS,
JANE!” to “I think that is kind of funny and it made me smile, possibly even laugh quietly to myself, so here is notification of that fact.”
At least, that’s how it SHOULD be used. But then there are people who just randomly LOL out of nowhere, for no reason. Like it’s a punctuation mark. “Dear Robyn – Hi, how are you? LOL! I was just thinking that I should email you and tell you I love cats, too. LOL I live in California, and it’s pretty nice, weather-wise, lately. LOL I was wondering, could you tell me when you had gastric bypass surgery? I can’t seem to find the exact date in your archives. LOL Sincerely, Suzie Q.
*”
Don’t get me started on ROFL.
Anyway. What was I saying? Whatever. Paul Harvey? Annoying but informative. LOL? Unnecessary and annoying.
LOVEYOUBYE!
*Fictional email, totally. But you get the idea. LOL!
**
**I couldn’t resist.
* * *
All is well in Maddy-ville. She’s getting feistier and more playful by the day. She can go up and down stairs (though that last step down makes her a little leery, since she’s going from carpeted step to wooden floor) and can climb up onto the couch. The big cats are starting to play with her, and since everywhere she goes, she goes at a run, Mister Boogers likes to chase her around like she’s a toy. Or prey, one or the other.
Bitey McBiterson strikes again.
More pictures
here.
* * *
Caren says,
Since you are crossing over (to the dog side) you have to see my dog Abby. She is yawning in the picture but I swear it looks like she is screaming “I can’t take this crazy place any longer”. She does! Or like she’s screaming “Make the lambs stop screaming…” Heh!
Bev says,
This is my kitten, Stanley. My hubby found him standing in the middle of a highway. He’s ADORABLE!! This is pretty much my favorite picture of him. EXCELLENT picture! Don’t you love it when all the stars align and you happen to have your camera handy and ready to go and get a picture like this?
Chris says,
This is my 13 year old cat named Katie. Katie is a tiny little thing but she’s got no less moxie than the biggest cat in the world. The poor thing was rescued by my husband when she was about 4 weeks old and weighed less than a pound, and we brought her in to a home with two other dogs. She held her own and is still doesn’t take any shit off of them now. She does love to snuggle with them and we swear she laughs at their antics, but don’t tell her I told you that. Anyway, I think she’s actually meowing here, but we like to think she’s laughing at another thing those damn dogs did. It looks like a yawn right?
Andria says,
You said you liked pictures of cats with their tongues out, so I thought I’d send you my favorite picture of my cat Chile, from when she was a kitten. Chile looks a LOT like Tommy did when he was a wee one, before he grew into the behemoth he is today. I love it when cats are at the rumpled stage before they grow out of their kitten-ness.
t0rie says,
Ever since your request for yawning kitty pics I’ve been trying to get a picture of our cat, Inca, yawning. Sneaky thing yawns all the time, but not in front of the camera. Finally caught one, but it’s not the greatest shot. (Hey – it’s a camera phone, whaddya expect!) But here you go. And had to attach a couple other Cute Kitty Pics of Inca, who is our rescue Burmilla from Mallorca. (Long story, but involved a long weekend in Mallorca then flying back with extra hand luggage of her at my feet on the plane!) What gorgeous green eyes! She reminds me a little of Fred’s old cat Poot, for some reason. Maybe the eyes!
Thank you Caren, Bev, Chris, Andria, and t0rie, for sharing your pictures!
* * *
Not as innocent as he looks.
* * *
Previously
2005: Annnnnnnnd that’s just a little glimpse into the dorkiness that is my life.
2004: ARRRGH.
2003: No entry.
2002: Wow. Apparently I’ve been doing the pet store thing for three years now.
2001: Day Zero.
2000: I’m back!]]>
1. When we moved out of the house we rented, we not only cleaned it, we also hired people to clean it. I cannot imagine leaving a house dirty. The house we bought was DISGUSTING and I would often have to take gag breaks when I was cleaning it.
2. I had someone who used to write me who would use LOL all the time. I liked to read her letters out loud to Andy and when I got to the LOL part I would say HAHA really loud. It made us laugh. (At her, not with her)
I just wanted to say that Mr. Boogers is my favorite of all your cats, and he is large and magnificent and fierce and handsome and . . .and who cares about some stinkin’ little kitten who is the cutest baby named Maddy ever.
Is it working?
Dear Monsieur Boogair,
You rock!! LOL!
Maybe the previous home owners had a tape in to Extreme Makeover – Home Edition and were just waiting for Ty and the gang to shred the house and start over. And when that didn’t happen, they decided to sell instead of work on cleaning it up!
The previous owners of our house didn’t finish any household projects either. Run out of fake hardwood flooring? Just put furniture over it. too lazy to take down wallpaper? Paint over it. Broken window? curtain. They actually removed a 24*24 inch piece of wall to access some plumbing, then screwed the wall back in. I guess they didn’t think we’d notice the wallpaper didn’t line up anymore. They put the wall in UPSIDE-DOWN. No puddy, just 2 screws.
Ugly wallpaper in every room, ceiling fans black with dirt. (how on earth can they get that dirty?) we pulled 57 nails out of the walls in the 2 kids bedrooms.
Anyways, you are miles ahead of us. We also closed on friday, but haven’t started any demolition yet. 🙂
Monsieur Boogairs,
I love you. Don’t worry – the stinkin’ kitten will be gone soon enough and you’ll be King Kat again.
I’m so lucky – the person who owned my condo was an absolute clean freak. I commented about how happy I was that the condo was very clean at the closing and the wife mentioned that she and her MIL went through the house after they moved out and cleaned it thoroughly. Of course, they took out the nails and spackle the holes, but took a 6″ diameter of spackle to cover one tiny nail hole. I had to paint the whole place – so moral is – It’s never just right!
Why are you so mean to me? I do have cats (LOL), I do live in Ca (LOL) and you used the correct spelling of my (real) first name (LOL). And you say this email is “fictional”? That being said, I do not use LOL though, therefore it must be ANOTHER SuzieQ. Phew. (LOL)
Monsieur Boogair you are one kick ass cat….
And your Mom is one cleaning machine……
I wonder if “half a hundred” drives you half as crazy as all the “primering” Fred has to do drives me! LOL!
(Sorry, but I had to — it’s just “priming” or “he needs to prime.” The material itself is called primer.) But I was seriously wondering, does he have to do every room? You really only need primer if you’re putting oil based paint on top of latex or vice versa, or covering a really deep color. And there you have my unasked-for home improvement/grammar advice. Moseying along, now.
The former owners of our house were pigs as well. I could’ve spent months trying to clean. I had to hire a crew because I didn’t have time. I don’t know how anyone can leave a house like that for someone who bought it.
As for Mr. Boogers… you always have been & will always be my favorite. We don’t need no stinkin’ kitten!!
And Robyn..my biggest peeve is not just LOL, but folks who LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. Makes me want to punch them in the teeth.
Monsieur Boogairs just has to be the long lost brother of Michel, the French-accented desk clerk from the Gilmore Girls. I could SO hear Michel’s voice reading Monsieur Boogairs letter to us all. Same attitude too. Yes, brothers for sure. Maybe even twins!
Thanks for making me literally ELL OH ELL this afternoon!
I think the “half-a-hundred” thing is mainly a southern syntax. I’m a native Texan, and my family says stuff like that all the time. It ranks right up there with “quarter-til-six” (or whatever hour). Just say 5:45, okay? Otherwise I have to do mental math, which does not make me a happy camper. Oy, my head hurts now.
lol…..ol
Oh, shit. I LOL’d you today (or yesterday) I think. Or maybe that was Jane. Goddammit, way to give me a complex! But Mr. Boogers loves me – Yay. Except he’s not going to love me when I finds out that I really sent that down there for ALL the cats. He ain’t THAT special. Or at least not as special as you are in that one picture that Fred has of you (the tractor) – LOL! snort.
Dear Monsieur Boogair,
I’m sorry you feel neglected because of that new thing they call Maddy Mack Mack. I’m writing now to tell you how handsome you are. You look just like my Grandma’s cat she named Frank. He was a great cat. So handsome and loving, and a ferocious hunter to boot! I’m sure you are, too, just from looking at your pictures. Your pictures show you’re a cat to be reckoned with and due the respect you demand.
Most sincerely,
Sandy, Mommy to Sunny, Ollie and Rascal
PS to your Mama: I love all the cat pictures and stories on your blog, it’s why I continue to visit. I know Sunny wants his own page on the www but Mommy is too lazy. Ollie is so photogenic she might overtake Sunny and his big fat cat orange greatness. But Rascal would give Mr. Monsieur Boogair a run for his money on nasty looks 😛 I’m lucky if I do a photoshoot once or twice a month. Until then, I’ll continue to enjoy your blog and cat photos 🙂
1. I say “quarter to six” and it is an entirely different thing than “5:45.” At 5:45 you’re talking about how long it’s been since it was 5; at quarter to six you’re talking about how long it will be until it’s six. HMPH. In fact, around here if you ask what time it is, people will spit out their chewing tobacky, squint at their watches and comment, “Why, it’s quarter to.” You have to figure out the hour by your damn self.
2. I will stand right here and state that I have left two houses dirty when I moved out of them. And I would do it again. I will never see those people again, and I had a new house to clean in each case. After all the selling and the inspecting and the fixing miniscule shit that their dumbass inspector tagged and giving them a new roof or garage door or back window or they’d RESCIND THEIR OFFER and the moving and the HELL OF IT ALL, I said FUCK THIS–let these goddamned buyers clean up, it ain’t my house anymore.
3. Dear Mr. Boogers: I hate you too.
4. Robyn, if any more “I peed!” people come to my comment section because of this, I shall LOL you to death.
I could just hear Mr. Boogers talking in an Inspector Cleausau (sp?) french accent. It was HILARIOUS, but I was NOT rofl. 🙂
Thanks for adding my picture of Chile, it was so fun to see her in your journal. She and her sister like to watch your movies of Maddy, they look all around the monitor to figure out where the kitty noises are coming from! I think this must mean they are ready for younger siblings.
I love you Monsieur Boogairs! I think you are indeed a King amongst cats, and very handsome.
We moved house last year and my Mum helped us clean it for 3 days before we had to move our furniture in, thank God. We bought it off some older people who had lived there 30 years. It took Some Doing.
May I just say that you are way less lazy than I am? The scrubbing, the taping, the painting, the going to Lowe’s, AAAARGH! Where’s the sitting around time?
Also, I can’t wait to see the blue that you picked out. Blue is my favorite bedroom color.
Its appalling what people leave behind when they move. Whe also cleaned the house we moved out of top to bottom and re-painted every stinking room before we left. Actually the week after we moved out. But we are generally clean people so it wasnt like we had to scrub away years of grime and dirt.
The house we bought had two brand new additions on it which was a big selling point. In the 7 years we have lived there we have had to have every aspect of those additions re-done because the previous owners did everything half assed! You can tell they were in a hurry to get the work done so they could sell it and nothing was done right-wiring, plumbing, windows, doors, floors. What a mess!
We had to clean our home that we moved it to. They were big smokers and there was a film on all the windows. It amazes me the way some people live.
That is the very reason I do not like to do pot lucks at work.
Growing up in southern WVA we always said, “fifteen minutes till six”
WE LOVE YOU, MONSIEUR BOOGAIRS!!
(Granted, the girls all love Miz Poo the best, but, well…)
Bonjour Msr. Boogairs –
I have four cats that live with me that hate me, so I can handle your hatred too. Of course, I do think you are quite a dashing and handsome kitty-fellow.
-Stephanie, Meowmy to Peppermint, Platinum, Pumpkin and Patches
When we bought our house the owners did clean almost everything – they vaccumed, dusted and mopped the floors, which is all well and good. They did not, however, clean the toilets, and the toilet in the bathroom their sons used – was covered in little boy urine and had shit streaks in the bowl. I would MUCH rather have vacuumed, mopped, etc myself, than clean some strangers shit and piss off toilets. I did enough of that when I worked at McDonalds as a teenager.
I know that when I move into a new place, I scrub everything from top to bottom. Serious scrubbing. After all, it’s not MY dirt. It’s THEIR dirt. And THEIR dirt is so much dirtier than MY dirt.
It’s very possible that the previous owners just didn’t SEE most of their dirt. If it’s against the side of the stove…. *blind*, baseboards? *blind* When you live in a house long enough (well, when I live in a house long enough) I stop seeing dirt unless it is right out in front of me. Clutter piles, carpet that needs vacuuming or the layer of dust on the bookshelves (I don’t dust… unless I get new pretty books to go into said bookshelves!)
I’m thinking that they probably honestly just didn’t see some of the dirt. Then again, I haven’t seen photographic evidence either… but I know that I don’t ever scrub the walls of my closet… someone is definitely I’m going to think I’m a messy marvin when I move out of this place!!
(Btw, Robyn, you have mad cleaning skillz. Those bathrooms were gleaming!! Tell me it was the cleaners and not the hours upon hours of work it took you to clean the bathrooms. Can’t I just spray on some presto-cleano on my bathroom and have it shine that way too??)
{{{hugs}}} Take care!